Way Off the Wall (Life in Xiamen Fujian China)

David Brainard Woodward

2011-09-06T00:48:00.000+08:00

In Loving Memory Sept. 2011


Dr. David and Betty Woodward

Happy Chinese Mid-Autumn Festival! We’ve much news thismonth, but we will save it for later because we'd like to celebrate the life of Dr. David Woodward (1918-2011),who married Sue and I in 1981 in Taiwan. Even today, 30 years wlater, he continues to influence our lives, andmany others, especially through one of those strange ‘coincidences’ that seem to pop up in ourlives…

Coincidences or Father’s Hand? In early 2011, twoChinese reporters interviewed me aboutthe amazing “coincidences” that have helped me pull together the history of theAmoy Mission (I was able to show them emails and other materials to documentthem).

Scientists have long tried to explainthese uncanny coincidences. In the 1920s,Carl Jung dubbed it synchronicity. EvenEinstein spoke of how his insights came not from logic but from unexplainedinspiration. Some call it the Force (rather like Star Wars!).But Isee it as our Father’s hand. He weavesthe tapestry of our lives so deftly and gentlythat we usually go about our lives completely unaware of just how much we takefor granted. But sometimes we entangle ourselves so much that He reaches into straighten out a knot or two—such as he did right after our honeymoon, andlater did with a gift from Dr. Woodward...

The Magic ZhengWhile in Taiwan for our wedding, Suebought a Chinese zheng for my wedding present. I had wanted one for years, and was delighted—and then I left it on apublic bus in San Francisco while transferring to another airport. I wasdevastated, and halfheartedly threw up a hopeless prayer—more of a complaintthan a plea for help, blaming my Father for allowing his child to be socareless. I had zero hope of ever seeingthe zheng again because neither the instrument nor the case had any ID. It was not, I felt, an auspicious way tostart married life—losing my wedding present before I even got it home.

A full month later, back in LosAngeles at grad school, I was called out of class to the office—and on thedean’s desk was my zheng—no note, no explanation! The bus company must have spent a month ofdetective work tracking down the owner of an instrument with no ID on it or init. For me, it was a special deliverystraight from heaven.

I thanked our Father for the returnedzheng—and apologized both for losing it and for blaming Him for my loss,because the incident drove home two valuable lessons. One—we, not our Father, are responsible tosteward what He entrusts to us. But two,and more encouraging to me, our Father really is there to help hischildren. And He continues to drive homethis lesson even today in ways so amazing that some have made it into theChinese newspapers! But one of mygreatest lessons came through the book “Detour from Tibet,” which Dr. Woodwardgave to us at our wedding....

Dr. Woodward, a grad of Princeton andFuller T.S. (my alma mater), set off on horseback in 1945 for Tibet, and thenserved for decades with Betty in India, Hong Kong and Taiwan, where Sue knewthe Woodwards while she was growing up (Sue’s parents were in Taiwan 30 years with TEAM,and she was born and raised there).

Marital Counseling—or Cautioning? Sue was thrilled thatDr. Woodward agreed to marry us at Taipei’s Christ Chapel, but I was nervouswhen he said he had to first counsel me. My ears were still burning from the marital counseling of Chuck Saunders, my friend from Taiwan days. (Read more about the Saunders at: www.amoymagic.com/AM_Saunders.htm)

Chuck Saunders

Don’t Do It, Willy! I met Sue at Chuck and Donna’s house in Pasadena on Easter Sunday, 1981,and after watching our love blossom, Chuck took me to a Mexican lunch anddispensed these words of wisdom: “Don’tdo it, Willy!” (Only Chuck, and ArtVelasquez, ever called me Willy—precisely because they knew I hated Willy).

Chuck was concerned not for me butfor Sue. He knew me from Air Force daysin Taiwan, and my time as a special agent in the U.S. and the Middle East, andhe was worried Sue would not be able to handle the kind of life I was likely tolive in mainland China. I of coursegreatly respected Chuck and his advice. He and Donna influenced me oneverything from attending Fuller T.S. to going into business, and then leavingbusiness to go to China. But when itcame to Susan Marie, I was deaf! Happilyfor us, once they realized we were determined to marry, they embraced us like 2^ndparents, and Chuck was the first to visit and encourage us in China right afterwe arrived in 1988.

Marriage Counseling—the Sequel After Chuck’s insightson marriage, I certainly did not want a second round of marital counseling fromDr. Woodward. But Dr. Woodward did notdissuade me, perhaps because the wedding was only 4 days away (and Sue’s dadhad my plane tickets and wouldn’t let me leave the island without his daughterin tow). But Dr. Woodward did advise meon how to keep the wife happy, and given that he was married to Betty for 66years, I figured he must know what he was talking about, and I listened!

The Magic BookAs we prepared for the wedding, Dr. Woodward delighted us with tall but truetales of entering Tibet on horseback, and he gave us a signed copy of his book“Detour from Tibet.” I treasured thatbook, which I read several times, and was one of the few books I took to China.So imagine my frustration when Sue loaned it to a Chinese student, who loanedit to another student, who lost it. Idid not say much about it, but inwardly I stewed at losing yet another weddingpresent. And unlike the zither, I never saw that book again, but our Fatherused it to teach us a great lesson!

A year after losing my treasuredbook, we heard that some of our university’s Chinese students had volunteeredto work in Tibet so they could also share their new Life there (Chinesetentmakers). And a year after that news,we had one of those “coincidences” that even today gives me goosebumps to thinkabout.

In 1994, Sue, the boys and I drove40,000 km. for 3 months around China, up the coast, through the Gobi Desert, toTibet and back. I was exhausted by thetime we reached Lhasa,(Tibet) but the second day both body and spirit werecharged when a young Chinese said to us, “Are you Bill Brown? I’m a believer from Xiamen Univ. whovolunteered to serve in Tibet. I was movedto do that because of your book, “Detour from Tibet!”

A year lesson, Dr. Woodward wasdelighted to hear that he was still touching the hearts of Tibetans half acentury after he left the place. Andhappily for me, he gave us another signed copy of his book. I do hope to hold on to this copy, but I alsopray that I’ll never again put books, or anything else, above people.

On August 23, 2011, Dr. Woodwardended his brief 93 year sojourn on this planet. And now, for the first time, hecan view the magnificent tapestry of life—not from the knotty and tangledbackside but from the beautiful perspective of the Master Weaver, for whom eventhe smallest thread has both beauty and purpose.

Ping'an, Dr. David Woodward!

Bill Brown
Xiamen University www.amoymagic.com

For Unto Us a Charlie's Born

2011-09-03T01:35:00.000+08:00

Early this morning I got word that Johanna and Chaz Bulbuk, grandson of John Bulbuk and Chuck & Donna Saunders, (whom I knew while I was in the Air Force in Taiwan, and who introduced Sue and I in Pasadena), finally had baby Charlie. About time! We thought he was coming ten days ago. Below is a poem to celebrate...
(Click pics of Charlie for larger images!)

For Unto us a Charlie's Born

September 2, 2011

Upon this brightand cheery morn,

an angel on aHarley,

Said, "To usall a child is born

And he shall becalled Charlie."

And how thischild has come to be,

Is a tale thatmust be told,

So here's thestory straight from me,

If I may be sobold.

Old Eden had itsendless fruits,

Israelis hadtheir manna,

David had hisbread and wine,

And Chaz? He hasJohanna!

And from thatmarriage made above,

And the union oftheir hearts,

We see the fruitof faith and love,

As today aJourney starts.

We waited longfor the little guy,

And Johanna grewyet rounder.

The doctorchecked, and heaved a sigh,

"He'sprobably a 20 pounder!"

But at long last,the doctor saw

a small head fullof hair.

That child lookedround in awe and said,

"I've beenlong enough in there."

8 pounds and 7ounces,

The kid was bornhalf grown,

And like a lionpounces,

Charlie struckout on his own.

20 inches full oflife,

And hungry fromthe get-go.

He headedstraight for mom's sweet breast,

And still hehasn't let go.

Now some may saythat we've evolved,

That life ischance or luck,

But we know thatour life's a gift,

Especially when aBulbuk!

So here's toCharlie, parents too,

And for you threeI pray,

That every dayour Lord renew

That love we seetoday.

With love &

thanksgiving,

Uncle Bill

Bill Brown Xiamen University www.amoymagic.com
Click Here to learn more about Chuck and Donna Saunders of the Asia Evangelical Mission

Davey Crockett in China?

2011-09-02T11:41:00.000+08:00

Well... Davey Crockett didn't make it to China--but his descendant did! I've long regretted knowing so little about my ancestry. I know Chinese who can trace their roots back over 35 generations, but until 5 years ago, I did not know my own roots further than two generations. So imagine my surprise to learn I'm descended from the man who once owned most of Washington D.C. before it was the capital, and a 16th century Jewish immigrant, a man from Glasgow Scotland (1500s), Asa Candler (who started Coca-Cola, from which I've inherited nothing!)...and Davey Crockett! (this by his second wife).

So I humbly represent Davey Crockett in China. But why not? I've accomplished what even Christopher Columbus failed to achieve. When he set sail, he was seeking not a New World but a short cut to an ancient one--to India and China, to be exact. And his destination in China was the famous port of Quanzhou, known by the Arabs as Zaiton (source of our word "satin"), and said to be a haven for Sinbad himself. Quanzhou is only 60 km. north of Xiamen. Columbus never made it to Quanzhou--but I've been there dozens of times, and even written a book about it. Eat your heart out, Chris!

Below is an email just forwarded to me by a fellow writing about our mutual descent from Davey Crockett (I was born William Neil Edmunson, by the way).

Yes I am aware of our connection of to Davey Crockett. His second wife was Elizabeth Patton of Buncombe County, NC. She was the sister to Margaret Patton who is my great-great-great grandmother, so I am the 3rd great grandnephew of Elizabeth and kin to Davey by their marriage. There are Crocketts all over Gibson County and a replica of his cabin (with some of the original timbers) is located just outside Rutherford. Davey's mother Rebecca Hawkins Crockett is buried there. Davey was a Colonel and Commander of the Lawrence County Malitia , a Justice of the Peace and a member of the Tennessee State Legislature and successful businessman while in Lawrence County. He owned a Distillery, Grist Mill and Gun Powder Mill untill a flash flood destroyed them and forced Davey and Elizabeth into bankruptsey. They sold what they had left and moved to what became Gibson County in West Tennessee where there was 1000 acres of land owned by Elizabeth's father, Robert Patton, who received it for service in the Revolutionary War. He devided this land into 200 acre lots to be divided it among his children. Davey was elected to US congress for 3 terms. When he lost his 4th bid for his congressional seat, he went to Texas and joined their fight for independance from Mexico. He was killed at the Alamo and his body burned by order of Santa Anna. In 1852 Elizabeth and some or the family moved to Texas to take up land awarded to Davey by the Republic of Texas. She and the families that went with her died and were buried there and relatives live there to this day. This and is on my web site on RootsWeb.

Virtus

Bill Brown Xiamen University www.amoymagic.com

Peter Pan in China?

2011-08-02T22:54:00.004+08:00

Pastor Gabe Orea of our Xiamen International Fellowship, or XICF, just sent me the link to an article about the newly opened Union Church on Gulangyu Islet, with before and after photos. The Union Church article is here: http://www.whatsonxiamen.com/news20453.html

By the way, in the article it mentions I’d given the church hundreds of old photos, but calls me William Pan. My Chinese name is Pan 潘维廉（often misspelled by Chinese as 潘威廉), so when they translate my name to English, it often comes out William Pan--but it could be worse. A year ago a well-dressed business lady stopped me in Xiamen (former "Amoy") and said, “You’re Professor Pan, right?” She thought a bit, then said, “Peter Pan?”

Well--close enough! I just turned 55 but still feel 15 (Sue says 5!).

On a similar note... When Sue and I were married in Taipei, Taiwan in December, 1981, we booked a room at the YMCA and paid in advance just in case we missed our Hong Kong--Taipei flight. Flights were indeed flighty back then (35 hours from L.A. to Taipei!). Sure enough, we missed the flight, but the people at the Kowloon YMCA said they had no reservation for us. We argued that we'd confirmed it and even paid for it, but it was no use.

We set out to find another place to stay but it was late at night, and everything else was too expensive, so we returned to the YMCA about midnight, dejected. The man behind the YMCA desk saw us sitting forlornly on a couch and said, "Oh, you're back. I have a question. Is William Brown the same as Bill Brown?" And we got our room.

Enjoy Amoy!

Bill

Bill Brown
Xiamen University
www.amoymagic.com

Foreign Income but no W2 -- what to do on your 1040

2011-07-29T09:56:00.002+08:00

Where do you put foreign income on the IRS Form 1040 when you file your tax return if you work overseas, as I do in China, and do not have a W2? I just spent half an hour on the phone with a very patient and helpful IRS expert on foreign income--and learned that the income goes on the 1040 Form Line 7, just like U.S. wages and salaries--even if you do not have the W2 to attach.

This was a relief to have confirmed, because the past week I've been facing an issue with U.S. finances, where I was told by experts that I had to provide a W2 for foreign income on Line 7--even though they admitted W2s are only provided in the U.S. But as the IRS man explained, wages and salaries are reported on Line 7, regardless of where they are earned, and if no W2, it goes there anyway (I had put it under "other income" a few years, which he said was clearly wrong--though thankfully they did not take me to task for it).

I know many others have had this problem, and hope this clears it up. If still doubtful, refer to the Form 1040 Instructions, Page 19 (for 2010 at least), which explains it quite clearly.

Thanks to the IRS for explaining that (and, I have to add, I've phoned them several times from China to ask about tricky issues, and they've always been quite helpful).

Enjoy Amoy!

Bill

Bill Brown Xiamen University www.amoymagic.com

Healthx24.com Croatian Attack

2010-09-14T06:54:00.001+08:00

Lost Face Book, Blogger, Croatian Attacks, etc.

Blogger is still blocked in China, as is Face Book (maybe China can start their own, called "Lost Face" Book) and Twitter. Personally, I don't miss Facebook (or Lostface Book) or Twitter, but do miss the blog.

But I used a VPN to make a serious warning. A friend's email address book was hijacked and messages sent to all friends with links to www.healthx24.com DO NOT click this! It is based in Croatia, and will open you up to who knows what (in face, not even who knows what yet).

Happy Mooncake Game, for those of you celebrating the Mid-Autumn Festival in Xiamen (Amoy). This is, by far, our liveliest time of the year, even more so than Chinese New Year, because of the unique "cake gambling game", which was supposedly invented (or at least perfected) by Koxinga almost 350 years ago to keep his homesick troops preoccupied.

Read about the Mooncake Gambling Game in my book Magic Xiamen (formerly Amoy Magic), or click here for a brief overview (scroll down the page though):
http://www.amoymagic.com/custom.htm
Enjoy Amoy!

Bill

Just a quick note, folks!

Bill Brown Xiamen University www.amoymagic.com

Manager Job Opening in Xiamen

2009-08-18T22:55:00.001+08:00

Bill Brown ... Xiamen University
I just received a note that a Xiamen firm seeks an expat (or Taiwan or Hong Kong resident) manager, age 30 to 40.
The link is at the bottom of this blog entry.
Note that the English requirements say "Kill and Experience Required." I think they meant to add an "S" in front of Kill (unless they're looking for a 007-type manager?).
Bill
(Job Responsibilities & Requirements)： JOB TITLE: QS/Tender Manager
REPORTING TO:City General Manager
LOCATION: Xiamen City

1.PRINCIPAL ACCOUNTABILITIES:

a.Project Cost Estimate Preparation or Review
b.Preparation of Cost Ledger
c.Sourcing, Assessment, Prequalification / Screening of Contractors ＆ Suppliers
d.Preparation or Review of Bid Documents
e.Administration of Bidding / Tendering Process
f.Preparation or Review of Contract Documents
g.Regular Project Budget Monitoring / Preparation of Cash Flow Projections
h.Payment Evaluation / Recommendation
i.Change Order Evaluation
j.Preparation or Review of Final Accounting of Construction Project

2.KILL AND EXPERIENCE REQUIRED:
Knowledge: Quantity Surveying / Cost Estimation, Project Construction
Education: Engineering degree （Civil）
Skills:organizing / management skills, negotiation skills, written and oral language skills （English and/or Chinese）, computer literacy, construction contract writing / reviewing
Experience: Quantity Surveying / Contracts or Tender Management / Construction Management
E-mail Mr. Emerson Chan, HR Supervisor, at: zhifu.chen@dfre.com.cn

Tel:0592-5859591*206
0592-5826089
Fax:0592-5859589
Website:www.dfre.com.cn

厦门顶峰房地产开发有限公

Click Here for Full Info

招聘期限： 2009-08-18 2009-09-07 16:14
招聘部门：预算部
联系人：陈先生(人事主管)
联系电话： (合则约见、谢绝来电)
通信地址：厦门市厦禾路885号厦门顶峰房地产开发有限公司(361004)(合则约见、非请勿访)

职位基本要求

学历要求：本科以上	性别要求：不限
职位性质：全职	招聘对象：七年工作经验以上
外语要求：英语水平要求精通	年龄要求： 30岁至40岁
工作地点：厦门市

Click Here for full Job info

www.amoymagic.com

Millennium Harbourview Hotel -- 5-Star Angels?

2009-08-06T01:34:00.000+08:00

Bill Brown ... Xiamen University
Xiamen's Best Hotels

I've often said that the best hotel in Xiamen is the Millennium Harbourview Hotel Xiamen because of the great location, excellent cuisines (best Italian in town), and excellent service. So today I was happy to come across this Yahoo review about the Millennium (the Millennium even found his lost luggage and helped him buy new clothes!). The review noted it had 5-star service and amenities. It's ironic, because Xiamen websites list it as 4-star, but many of the so-called 5-star hotels in Xiamen have 4-star or even 3-star. In my eyes, Millennium is the star.

Incredible Service!
By A Yahoo! Contributor, 06/29/09
This was my favorite stay on my business trips over this past month. The location was amazing, right in the downtown but within view of Gulangyu Island. When my luggage was lost by the airlines, the hotel's Concierge called the airlines continuously and got my luggage delivered straight to me. Meanwhile I had no clothes aside from what I was wearing, since they were all in my lost luggage, but a charming angel at Guest Relations walked with me to the nearby Trustmart and helped me buy a set of clothes.

The room was comfortable, all the standard 5 star amenities, and the breakfast was great. The hotel is priceless and I will be returning every time on my following visits. Thank you Millennium Harbourview for the amazing experience!!!
http://travel.yahoo.com/p-travelguide-482571-xiamen_vacations-i

www.amoymagic.com

Xiamen Rent a Car

2009-08-02T01:50:00.000+08:00

Bill Brown ... Xiamen University

It is now possible to rent a car in Xiamen, with a driver or to drive yourself--but caution is in order!

First, driving a car in China is totally unlike driving back home. It is automotive warfare, survival of the fastest. Don't believe me? Read "Darwinian Driving--Survival of the Fastest." While it is humorous, it is also 100% true (as even Chinese friends have admitted).

Still want to rent a car in Xiamen? There are various websites, but as far as I can find, they are all in Chinese. But if you can't read Chinese, you'll have problems anyway. Many cities have signs full of Chinese writing warning against this or that on this street or in that area. I've only had 3 tickets in my 30+ years of driving in the U.S., but I had 3 in China within 30 days of getting my license back in 1993.

Still, if you're careful, you'll find that driving in China is not only survivable but even enjoyable (in China, who needs Nintendo or Wii or Play Station if you have a car, and streets full of cars and pedestrians to dodge--or, on occasion, hit). Driving really frees you up, and we've put 200,000 km. on our two cars, even driving 40,000 km. to Tibet and Back, in 1994 (through the Gobi Desert no less, in our 2-wheel drive Toy Ota).

Try this website for cars ranging from 250 Yuan to 1200 Yuan a day:
http://www.xm-lease.net/

And do read about Darwinian Driving in China!

Also check out Tibet in 80 Days

Enjoy Amoy!

Dr. Bill

www.amoymagic.com

Free legal software to remove DRM from audio files

2009-08-02T00:32:00.000+08:00

Bill Brown ... Xiamen University

I was frustrated to find that the album I bought online was DRM protected WMA files. While the site had claimed they could be played on MP3 players, they could not. They worked on my computer, but not on my iPod shuffle (a dinosaur-version, given to me by my sister years ago), or my Philips MP3 player. Itunes would not play them because it said they were protected and could not be converted.

I spent hours searching for ways to remove the DRM (after all, I did not illegally download these, but paid for them from a reputable site; I should be able to play them). The internet is chock full of links to Free DRM removal software and DRM free software and every combination you can think of--all throwing in the word FREE to get you to click. But almost everyone ended up charging $30 or $40 or more to convert more than 30 seconds or so. But I found a FREE Solution!

First...if the files are DRM Free (no DRM protection), you can convert WMA to MP3 easily, quickly, and for free with a FREEWARE program (not a trial--really free), called Switch Audio Converter. While they do urge you to pay for the upgraded version, their free WMA to MP3 conversion software works fine. I just used it--and it works for both Windows and MAC. (And, by the way, I receive no commission for referring you; I just hope you can avoid the hours of fruitless searching that I spend downloading, installing, and then uninstalling and deleting a dozen programs that claimed to be free but were not).

The next part-- removing DRM for free-- is trickier. The only easy to use Freeware that I could find was AnalogWhole. Actually, I'd think that removing DRM would be illegal, but Analog gets around this by playing the file on your computer and recording it as an unprotected copy. This is real time, so it takes 30 minutes to convert a 30 minute audio file. Slow--but it is 100% free DRM removal software. The other disadvantage, though, is that as it records the file being played, it picks up ambient noise (taps on the computer, movement, etc.). The background noise was distracting. You have to adjust the microphones just right (it helps you do this), because too low and you can't hear the DRM free copy, but too high and you get distortion, and it picks up everything from computer noise to your intestines digesting the previous night's pizza. Still...for free, who can complain.

The Best Solution for Converting DRM protected files? Don't buy them in the first place, if you can possibly avoid it. I understand the reasoning behind them, but it penalizes those of us who do buy legal copies, for our own personal Fair Use. But if, like me last night, you pay good money for files that you can't play on your MP3 player, then the above is the only really free solution that I could find.

If you know of better free solutions to removing DRM protection, please share them.

In closing--I am assuming that anyone reading this is seeking a way to remove DRM encoding from audio or video files that were obtained legally, and are being used legally--not shared!

Enjoy Amoy!

Bill

www.amoymagic.com

Xiamen Olympic Museum

2009-08-01T04:15:00.000+08:00

Bill Brown ... Xiamen niversity

The Xiamen Olympic Museum, the only one of its kind in China approved by both the Chinese Olympic Committee and the International Olympic committee, now has a nice English Web Site.

Visit the museum, and nearby, on the Island Ring Road, note the 99 slightly larger than life bronze statues of marathon runners. The winner is, as happens every year, an African runner. Last in place is a "runner" in a wheelchair, being pushed by a friend (a nice touch, as Xiamen has numerous programs to encourage physically challenged locals to get involved in sports, which is why the Fresno-based "Break the Barriers" program received record media attention when they performed in Xiamen).

See "Break the Barriers Proves Anti-Gravity in Xiamen."

Also check out our beautiful 6km. (actually, 5.9 km). Xiamen Boardwalk.

www.amoymagic.com

World's Largest Organ Museum

2009-08-01T02:55:00.000+08:00

Bill Brown

Hu Youyi, the Gulangyu-born piano collector who now resides in Australia and founded Gulangyu's Piano Museum (the largest in Asia, and the only one in China), has also built the world's largest organ museum on Gulangyu (no, it is not a museum for the world's largest organ, but the largest museum for organs; I just know someone would grab hold of that).

The museum has more than 100 organs, including over 30 varieties of reed organs, accordions, pianicas and three large-scale pipe organs.

It is in the Bagua Lou (Eight Diagram Building--the prominent domed building that resembles a consulate).

Xiamen University
www.amoymagic.com

Medical Prescriptions in Xiamen

2009-08-01T00:24:00.000+08:00

Bill Brown       Xiamen University

30 July 2009, Ms. K.S. wrote:
HI there,

I am moving to Xiamen from New York City in a few weeks. I take some prescribed medications. I am hoping you can tell me whether or not I will be able to get them in Xiamen as well. I regularly take Adderall. Do you have this medicine there? Is it easily available? Is it expensive? Who do I need to get a prescription from in China, a physician or psychiatrist? Should I bring a letter from my doctor here?

I hope you can help! I am desperate to find out as it may affect my trip.

Thank you for your time.

All the best,

K,S,

My reply: I think you need not worry, especially with the opening of the Chenggang Hospital (check our site's Xiamen Hospitals page). Many prescription meds are available over the counter. Those that aren't, you can get prescriptions at hospitals (we prefer Chenggang). But meds such as sleeping meds are generally doled out only half a dozen pills at a time, meaning a trip once or twice a week to the hospital, which is a pain, so you might want to bring a supply of those.
        Enjoy Xiamen!
        Bill
www.amoymagic.com

Lose 100 Pounds in 6 Months Guaranteed!

2009-07-19T10:16:00.000+08:00

Bill Brown   ... Xiamen University

According to recent research, six foods will keep you so full and satisfied that, in theory, you would have negative weight in weeks.
   No less an authority than Liz Vaccariello, Editor-in-Chief, PREVENTION, wrote on Sat Jun 27, 2009: (I edit it down considerably):

   Eggs quell hunger. Women on low-fat diets who ate 2 eggs for breakfast at least 5 days a week lost 65% more weight and averaged 83% greater reduction in waist size (substitute low-fat yogurt for eggs if you're vegan).

   Almonds: are full of healthy monounsaturated fatty acids. Studies "prove" that after six months, dieters who eat almonds lost 63% more weight, 50% more body fat, and shrunk waistlines 55% more than those on high carb diets (though careful--they're high calorie).

   Avocados: loaded with healthy monounsaturated fats, vitamins and minerals, and satisfying.

   Apples: people who eat apples with every meal lose 40% more than those who do not (I guess it doesn't matter what you do or do not eat in addition to apples).

   Oatmeal: slows digestion, keeps you full for hours,and people who eat oatmeal for every breakfast and walk 15 to 20 minutes a day lose 10 pounds in 12 weeks.

    Peanut butter: research proves dieters who eat it lose more weight than those who don't (but didn't say how much weight, or how much peanut butter to eat).

   Do the math! Just eat eggs, almonds, avocados, apples, oatmeal and peanut butter, and in six months you'll weigh less than when you were born and you can be a fashion model in Shanghai, Paris, or Los Angeles' Hill Street.

www.amoymagic.com

4th of July in Xiamen --1921!

2009-07-05T09:04:00.004+08:00

Bill Brown ... Xiamen University

Some folks from the U.S. Consulate in Guangzhou, and visitors from the U.S., had some sort of get together in Xiamen (former Amoy), a week before July 4th. That was the closest, perhaps, to having an "official" 4th of July celebration in Xiamen for over 60 years. But I have accounts from journals and diaries of pretty big July 4th celebrations in Xiamen dating back to the mid 1850s, and below is a photo of Americans in Amoy celebrating the U.S.' birthday in 1921. (I'm certainly glad we don't have to brave Xiamen summers in those kinds of clothes today).

By the way, while we're celebrating the 4th, let's give thanks to Xiamen, because no Xiamen, no U.S.A.! After all, it was Anxi tea (from Quanzhou) shipped from Xiamen by a Xiamen ship that was dumped overboard during the Boston Tea Party of 1773. So were it not for Xiamen, there would be no 4th of July, our lawyers would still be wearing powdered white wigs (like the guys in HK still wear), and we'd be eating our french fries with malt vinegar instead of ketchup. So.... thank you Xiamen!
Happy 4th!
Bill
Click the image for a larger view:

www.amoymagic.com

The Great Firewall

2009-07-01T18:36:00.001+08:00

Bill Brown
Around April, 2009, the Great Firewall of China blocked many servers, including Blogger, which hosts my blogs--so I can no longer easily update them unless I use a Proxy, which is not secure. So...no more posts for awhile.
Oh well. Life is Off the Wall.... especially when it's behind the Great Firewall.

Xiamen University
www.amoymagic.com

How to Unanswer E-mails!

2009-05-11T14:55:00.001+08:00

Bill Brown ... Xiamen University
Ever struggled about whether you should reply to that e-mail or letter, or wait a bit--or toss it? In "The Wisdom of America," Lin Yutang quoted a delightful essay On Unanswering Letters, published back in 1928, long before people were deluged with daily letters, e-mail, and SPAM.

Ironically, the fellow in the essay who wrote the unanswered letter was named "Bill." Do you think that was a hint for me. If so, jot me a line and I'll get back to you--about Thanksgiving or Christmas.

On Unanswering Letters,
by Christopher Morley, from Essays, 1928, J.B. Lippincott Company
(Quoted in The Wisdom of America, pp. 250-253)

There are a great many people who really believe in answering letters the day they are received, just as there are people who go to the movies at nine o clock in the morning; but these people are stunted and queer.

It is a great mistake. Such crass and breathless promptness takes away a great deal of the pleasure of correspondence.

The psychological didoes involved in receiving letters and making up one s mind to answer them are very complex. If the tangled process could be clearly analyzed and its component involutions isolated for inspection we might reach a clearer comprehension of that curious bag of tricks, the efficient Masculine Mind.

Take Bill F., for instance, a man so delightful that even to contem plate his existence puts us in good humor and makes us think well of a world that can exhibit an individual equally comely in mind, body and estate. Every now and then we get a letter from Bill, and immediately we pass into a kind of trance, in which our mind rapidly enunciates the ideas, thoughts, surmises and contradictions that we would like to write to him in reply. We think what fun it would be to sit right down and churn the ink-well, spreading speculation and cynicism over a number of sheets of foolscap to be wafted Billward.

Sternly we repress the impulse for we know that the shock to Bill of getting so immediate a retort would surely unhinge the well-fitted panels of his intellect.

We add his letter to the large delta of unanswered mail on our desk, taking occasion to turn the mass over once or twice and run through it in a brisk, smiling mood, thinking of all the jolly letters we shall write some day.

After Bill's letter has lain on the pile for a fortnight or so it has been gently silted over by about twenty other pleasantly postponed manuscripts. Coming upon it by chance, we reflect that any specific problems raised by Bill in that manifesto will by. this time have settled themselves. And his random speculations upon household management and human destiny will probably have taken a new slant by now, so that to answer his letter in its own tune will not be congruent with his present fevers. We had better bide a wee until we really have some thing o circumstance to impart.

We wait a week.

By this time a certain sense of shame has begun to invade the privacy of our brain. We feel that to answer that letter now would be an indelicacy. Better to pretend that we never got it. By and bye Bill will write again and then we will answer promptly. We put the letter back in the middle of the heap and think what a fine chap Bill is. But he knows we love him, so it doesn t really matter whether we write or not.

Another week passes by, and no further communication from Bill. We wonder whether he does love us as much as we thought. Still we are too proud to write and ask.

A few days later a new thought strikes us. Perhaps Bill thinks we have died and he is annoyed because he wasn*t invited to the funeral, Ought we to wire him? No, because after all we are not dead, and even if he thinks we are, his subsequent relief at hearing the good news of our survival will outweigh his bitterness during the interval. One of these days we will write him a letter that will really express our heart, filled with all the grindings and gear-work of our mind, rich in affection and fallacy. But we had better let it ripen and mellow for a while. Letters, like wines, accumulate bright fumes and bubblings if kept under cork.

Presently we turn over that pile of letters again. We find in the lees of the heap two or three that have gone for six months and can safely be destroyed. Bill is still on our mind, but in a pleasant, dreamy kind of way* He does not ache or twinge us as he did a month ago. It is fine to have old friends like that and keep in touch with them. We wonder how he is and whether he has two children or three. Splendid old Bill!

By this time we have written Bill several letters in imagination and enjoyed doing so, but the matter of sending him an actual letter has begun to pall. The thought no longer has the savour and vivid sparkle it had once. When one feels like that it is unwise to write. Letters should be spontaneous outpourings: they should never be undertaken merely from a sense of duty. We know that Bill wouldn t want to get a letter that was dictated by a feeling of obligation.

Another fortnight or so elapsing, it occurs to us that we have entirely forgotten what Bill said to us in that letter. We take it out and con it over. Delightful fellow! It is full of his own felicitous kinks of whim, though some of it sounds a little old-fashioned by now- It seems a bit stale, has lost some of its freshness and surprise. Better not answer it just yet, for Christmas will soon be here and we shall have to write then anyway. We wonder, can Bill hold out until Christmas without a letter?

We have been rereading some of those imaginary letters to Bill that have been dancing in our head. They are full of all sorts of fine stuff. If Bill ever gets them he will know how we love him. To use O. Henry s immortal joke, we have days of Damon and Knights of Pythias writing those uninked letters to Bill A curious thought has come to us. Perhaps it would be better if we never saw Bill again. It is very difficult to talk to a man when you Eke him so much. It is much easier to write in the sweet fantastic strain. We are so inarticulate when face to face. If Bill comes to town, we will leave word that we have gone away. Good old Bill! He will always be a precious memory.

A few days later a sudden frenzy sweeps over us, and though we have many pressing matters on hand, we mobilize pen and paper and literary shock troops and prepare to hurl several battalions at BilL But, strangely enough, our utterance seems stilted and stiff. We have nothing to say. My dear Bill, we begin, it seems a long time since we heard from you. Why don t you write? We still love you, in spite of all your shortcomings.

That doesn t seem very cordial. We muse over the pen and nothing comes. Bursting with affection, we are unable to say a word.

Just then the phone rings. "Hello?"we say.

It is Bill, come to town unexpectedly.

"Good old fish!" we cry, ecstatic. "Meet you at the corner of Tenth and Chestnut in five minutes."

We tear up the unfinished letter. Bill will never know how much we love him. Perhaps it is just as well. It is very embarrassing to have your friends know how you feel about them. When we meet him we will be a little bit on our guard. It would not be well to be betrayed into any extravagance of cordiality.

And perhaps a not altogether false little story could be written about a man who never visited those most dear to him, because it hurt him so to say good-bye when he had to leave.

www.amoymagic.com

The Mother of Mother's Day

2009-05-10T18:25:00.002+08:00

Bill Brown ... Xiamen University
Happy Mother's Day from Amoy!
I wrote this article for Common Talk in 2006.

When Anna May Jarvis's mother died on the second Sunday of May 1906, Anna May wished she had heeded the warning to, “Lavish your flowers on the living, not the dead.” Driven by remorse, the gentle, easy going Anna May became obsessed with the desire to see her mother and motherhood honored throughout the world.

After a year’s planning, the first Mother's Day was celebrated on the second anniversary of her mother’s death, May 10, 1908, at St. Andrew’s Methodist Church in Grafton, West Virginia, where Anna’s mother had taught Sunday School. A year later, Philadelphia became the first city to proclaim an official Mother’s Day. Three years later, in 1914, President Woodrow Wilson signed Public Resolution 25, establishing the second Sunday of each May as Mother's Day. And then, to everyone’s surprise, Anna May retired and spent the remaining 34 years of her life, and her fortune of over 100,000 dollars, fighting against Mother’s Day!

The problem was that from day one, Mother’s Day had become a great commercial extravaganza to boost the incomes of card and candy makers, and a salve to soothe the consciences of those who each May made mother a “queen for the day” but neglected her the other 364 days.

Anna May complained, “Mother’s Day has nothing to do with candy. Candy is junk. A maudlin, insincere printed card or a ready-made telegram means nothing except that you’re too lazy to write to the woman who has done more for you than anyone else in the world. You ought to go home and see your mother on Mother’s Day. You ought to take her out and paint the town red...You ought to give her something useful, something permanent...Is she sleeping warm at night? Could she use an eiderdown? Maybe the stairs in her home need fixing...”

For 30 years, Anna May fought for the integrity of Mother’s Day. She finally died in a sanitarium — old, tired, deaf, blind, penniless, and having never married nor been a mother herself!

Sixty years later, mothers may be more neglected than ever. Statistics show one half of Americans, which of course includes one half of our mothers, live in poverty. Where are the children? More than ever, mothers deserve more than cards and candy one day a year and anonymity the other 364.

My appreciation of motherhood only began as I watched my wife, Susan Marie, in both sickness and health, unselfishly spend herself on her two sons (and her husband as well!). I also slowly came to better appreciate my own mother, and though she’s 12,000 miles away, I am now careful to not only send her the obligatory Mother’s Day card and flowers but also to regularly write and phone her.

Fortunately, most Common Talk readers are not 12,000 miles away from home! So as Mother's Day catches on in China, let us seek to make Mother’s Day not a card-and-candy substitute for well-deserved love but the crown and pinnacle of a full year’s expression of love and appreciation for the one who gave us life: our mother.
www.amoymagic.com

Princeton Premier Business Leaders and Professionals Honors Edition

2009-05-07T21:50:00.000+08:00

Bill Brown ... Xiamen University
For years I've been getting invitations for "Who's Who in -- Fill in the Blanks," and countless Chinese versions of such "honors," but today I received this one from "Princeton." Pretty impressive--except as far as I can tell it really has nothing to do with Princeton. It is just a scam to get you to spend $100 nonrefundable to be included. But some Chinese colleagues are so excited about these frauds and think they're the ticket to fame and fortune abroad.

As Groucho Marx said in his oft-repeated quip, "I would not join any organization that would take me as a member."

Below is the entire letter, but for the record--I think none of these are worth the money they charge you, even if they're legitimate. In High School I paid for the "Who's Who" volume with me in it, and the "Outstanding American High School Students", and a couple others. My parents were very excited about them and did not want to miss the chance to get them. But what prospective employer or school really cares? These "directories" go by information you send them, and as far as I know do not verify anything. If I were a university or a prospective employer, I'd go by a resume that I could verify rather than a commercial "honors" directory.

Don't waste your money!

Dear Bill,
It is my pleasure to inform you that you are being considered for inclusion into the 2009-2010 Princeton Premier Business Leaders and Professionals Honors Edition section of the registry.
The 2009-2010 edition of the registry will include biographies of the world's most accomplished individuals. Recognition of this kind is an honor shared by thousands of executives and professionals throughout the world each year. Inclusion is considered by many as the single highest mark of achievement.
You may access our application form using the following link:
http://www.formdesk.com/pgn6/New
Upon final confirmation, you will be listed among other accomplished individuals in the Princeton Premier Registry.

For accuracy and publication deadlines, please complete your application form and return it to us within five business days.
There is no cost to be included in the registry.
If you've already received this email from us, there is no need to respond again.
This email serves as our final invitation to potential members who have not yet responded.
On behalf of the Executive Publisher, we wish you continued success.
Sincerely,
Jason Harris
Managing Director
Princeton Premier

Princeton Premier
23-35A Steinway St - Astoria, NY 11105 - USA

We only support ethical email marketing. To remove yourself from future mailings, please visit here to use our automated removal system. You will be removed from our mailing database within seven (7) days. 7505

www.amoymagic.com

Chinese vs. American Culture

2009-05-02T22:42:00.007+08:00

Bill Brown ... Xiamen University
I've been asked to lecture at a Chinese high school in Xiamen about the differences between Chinese and American culture, so below, and in a few following blogs, will be some rough drafts of my thoughts so far.
Any suggestions or additions? Please add them in the comments! I have a week to pull this together...

Differences between Chinese & American Culture

The longer I live in China, the more I realize that the difference between Chinese culture and American culture is—everything! From use of color to how we cook, from body language to body space, we are not just separate cultures but different planets. But fortunately, most of this is on the social level. Individually, we are very similar indeed, with the same needs, hopes, and fears as any other peoples on the planet. So I believe that the day will come when East does meet West—though it may not be in my lifetime.

There are so many issues in which we differ, so for this talk I will focus on just a few that many of us would assume are universal, such as views on body space and privacy, importance of family and patriotism, value of education and view of teachers, use of time and history, use of color, cooking and dining, and a little about Chinese and American humor. Of course, I may not be the right one to write this. My wife Susan Marie says I have no culture whatsoever. She’s probably right—but at least I have class. In fact, I have 12 hours of class a week in the MBA Program. Personally, I never expected to have so many classes in a classless society.

Part 1. Chinese & American Cooking & Dining
“With English cooking you boil the chicken, throw away the water and eat the chicken. With Chinese cooking you boil the chicken, throw away the carcass and drink the soup.” Anonymous

“One should eat to live, not live to eat.” Moliere

“Moliere never ate Chinese food.”
Bill Brown

I once joked that Adam and Eve could not have been Chinese because if they’d been Chinese, Eve would have tossed the apple and eaten the snake. But an Overseas Chinese friend said, “Not true! If she’d been Chinese, she’d have sold the apple, and then eaten the snake.”

Chinese seem to live for food, and spend much of their day preparing or eating dishes that are a feast for both palate and eyes—and things I never could have imagined people would eat. I eventually learned that Chinese eat anything edible, and if it isn’t edible, they call it medicine and ingest it anyway.

In N.W. Fujian they boast about noodles made from the flour of a very poisonous tuber. “Takes 18 steps to make it safe,” my host told me. I asked him how many people died on steps 1 to 17.

And birds nests! Just who thought of crawling up the side of a cliff into a cave to steal bird’s nest made of solidified swallow spit—and then cooking it? And in China I think I’ve eaten every part of a chicken, cow or pig except the meat itself. Chinese will fuss over a tiny morsel of meat that’s smaller than some of the bits I fish out of my mouth with a toothpick after the meal. If they do give you meat, it’s chopped up small—and chock full of sharp little bones. Personally, I think it’s all a front, carried out on a national level, and after foreign guests leave the room, the Chinese bring out the steaks and chops (and probably knives and forks as well).

The hardest thing to get used to is how long Chinese take to eat. At one of our first three-hour 20-course meals in China, my oldest son, who was only five, said, “This is certainly not fast food—it’s slow food.” For Chinese, meals are a social event. For Americans, meals are a pitstop for refueling. Quite often, we just swallow our meal whole and then chew it later.

www.amoymagic.com

Lin Yutang on the Futility of Force

2009-05-02T17:06:00.005+08:00

Bill Brown ... Xiamen University
In 1943, in his book "Between Tears and Laughter," Lin Yutang angered friends and foes alike by candidly laying bare the true motives behind the wars and the political machinations going on around the planet. And by the simple expediency of analyzing what the "Powers" had been doing, Lin was able to predict exactly what those same Powers would be doing half a century later.

Though Christ said, "Blessed are the peacemakers," I am skeptical of the motives of some who cry peace, peace (Herr Hitler cried peace even as he sharpened his swords]. But like Lin Yutang, I also do not feel it is unpatriotic or unChristian to question the motives of those resorting to war for the cause of peace.

The following excerpt from Lin Yutang's Between Tears and Laughter is, I think, even more poignant today, over 60 years after it was written. Download the entire book at Internet Archives, and as you read it, note the parallels with much of what we see today. In particular--note how Lin predicted we would rebuild Japan, and why.

Lin Yutang on the Futility of Force

Who will make plain to the world the law of the spirit, and demonstrate that Force generates Coercion, Coercion generates Fear, and Fear generates Hatred, as definitely and as accurately as one billiard ball sends another rolling? Who will write a philosophy and psychology of Force and its reactions and determine their characteristics ? Who will be the consummate fatalist to tell the world in plain, convincing, forceful terms that actions generate emotions and emotions in turn generate actions, that the fruit of Force is Fear and Hatred, that thoroughgoing Force generates Fear and Hatred and unthoroughgoing Force generates Hatred without Fear? Who will say, even as in a classroom in physics, that the greater the Force, the greater the Hatred, and that the greatest Force is the most hated of all?

And who will say, as clearly as the prophets of the sky say that a thunderclap presages a storm, that Force is inevitably followed by Hatred, and Hatred is followed by Revenge? For Hatred divides, and the structure of power must sooner or later fall.

In ignorance of such simple and self-evident moral laws, Pericles alternately threatened by force and cajoled by oratory the other Greek states. And after his death, Cleon the leather merchant, Eucrates the rope-seller, and Hyperbolus the lampmaker babbled. They were all good democrats and Cleon was a good general It was left only for the insolent public idol, Alcibiades, to complete the suicide of Greece.

But such laws, being the laws of God, are manifest to the mind of the simple man, requiring no proof. Therefore, he who would be strong within must guard against the use of power, for only then is he safe from corruption within and hatred without. And only he who is free from corruption within and hatred without can be strong eternally. Laotse says, "For love is victorious in attack and invulnerable in defense. Heaven arms with love those it would not see destroyed." Therefore he says:

Of all things, soldiers are instruments of evil, Hated by men. Therefore the religious man avoids them. Soldiers are weapons of evil; They are not the weapons of the gentleman. When the use of soldiers cannot be helped, The best policy is calm restraint. Even in victory, there is no beauty, And who calls it beautiful Is one who delights in slaughter. He who delights in slaughter Will not succeed in his ambition to rule the world. The slaying of multitudes should be mourned with sorrow. A victory should be celebrated with the Funeral Rite. Those who love America and England and wish them to be strong forever must read Laotse again and again, for they will gain thereby the secret of immortal strength, exempt from corruption within and invulnerable from attack without. Let America be great, even as the great river of life: The Great Tao flows everywhere, (Like a flood) it may go left or right The myriad things derive their life from it, And it does not deny them. When its work is accomplished, It does not take possession. It clothes and feeds the myriad things, Yet does not claim them as its own... Because to the end it does not claim greatness, Its greatness is achieved. How did the great rivers and seas become the Lords of the Ravines ? By being good at keeping low. That was how they became the Lords of the Ravines. Therefore in order to be the chief among the people, One must speak like their inferiors. In order to be foremost among the people, One must walk behind them. Thus it is that the sage stays above, And the people do not feel his weight; Walks in front, And the people do not wish him harm. Then the people of the world are glad to uphold him forever. Because he does not contend, No one in the world can contend against him. I am not worried lest America may not be able to assert a leadership of force and power; I am worried lest she may. I am concerned to see America assume a moral leadership, a leadership of humility, so that the world may pay her glad homage and uphold her forever. Like the great river that nourishes life along its valley, she shall by the exuberance and richness of her life be a blessing upon the peoples of the earth. She shall stay above, and the world shall not feel her weight; she shall walk in front and no one will wish her harm. For she shall then lead in kindness and unselfishness and justice and by that secret of unused power bring a new era of brotherhood to mankind. No one can dethrone her because of her power for goodness, and no one can take away from her, because she does not take possession, She shall not contend, and no one in the world can contend against her, and because she takes no credit, the credit can never be taken away from her. This is my Dream America. Will it come true? Man has done it before. Abraham Lincoln did it. George Washington did it. In a world of evil chaos, great men have stood up and with the strength of their goodness and their simplicity and the innocence of youth proclaimed that the good in men can outweigh the evil, and they have acted upon that assumption.

Note: Lin did note, interestingly, that there were occasions where war was unavoidable:
"Civil wars are necessary in a nation until an equilibrium is restored. Revolts against empires are necessary until the invader is driven out. The only stable equilibrium in the world is the equilibrium of equality. Only when such equilibrium is reached can we have peace. Small countries have the right to fight, perhaps to settle an old boundary dispute. Big countries have no right to fight, ever, because when they fight they involve the whole world.

Lin Yutang on "Big Neighbors":

...Of all the fifty or sixty nations in the world, only three or four big powers are upsetting the peace of the world. These powers have run over this earth, kicking down people's fences in bad temper and worse manners, robbing them of their liberty and independence, and taking possession of their goods and have then
fought wars among themselves for these goods. First they fought among themselves, and then they called upon the entire world to fight for them to keep what they have. This makes little sense, and it makes still less sense to say that we can have peace only by giving greater power to the big powers and disarming the small powers, on the plea that the small powers may combine to attack them!

Big Powers, at least behave as if you were not scared! But now we suddenly hear about policing the world, as if the Greenlanders and Samoans and Formosans and Burmese were threatening the world peace, while the big powers don their uniforms, strutting about to club the small powers on their heads with a baton if they do not behave. It would seem that we could well police the big powers for a while and leave the poor Samoans and Balinese and Eskimos alone. But, no, we cannot disarm the big powers, because the big powers will not be disarmed, after having so heroically fought and triumphed in this war. Very well, then, let's have wars eternally. The first thing we know the police will start shooting among themselves and scare us poor humble neighbors out of our wits.www.amoymagic.com

Proof: U.S. Government is Taoist!

2009-04-29T15:31:00.009+08:00

Bill Brown ... Xiamen University
At long last I have discovered the secret behind how the U.S. government works: both Democrats and Republicans alike are Taoists. Need proof? Just consider the following passage from Lao Tse's "Tao Dejing" (Taoist Scripture). Though written five centuries before Christ, the following passage sounds just like a manual for modern government:

"The ancients who showed their skill in practicing the Tao did so, not to enlighten the people, but rather to make them simple and ignorant.
The difficulty in governing the people arises from their having much knowledge. He who (tries to) govern a state by his wisdom is a scourge to it; while he who does not (try to) do so is a blessing." 65 道德经:古之善为道者，非以明民，将以愚之。民之难治，以其智多。故以智治国，国之贼；不以智治国，国之福。

If people ruled by leaders without wisdom are blessed, we are very fortunate in this day and age! But seriously, Old Lao Tzu did have some shrewd insights on good government. Consider verse 57:

"In the kingdom the more prohibitions, the poorer the people become...the more laws, the more thieves and robbers there are." 57道德经:天下多忌讳，而民弥贫...法令滋彰，盗贼多有。

No wonder Mark Twain said we had so many cons in Congress.

Not that I'm complaining--at least much. For all America's faults, at least we are allowed to complain about them--a freedom that in itself covers a multitude of sins. If dissent is allowed, change is possible--at least in theory.

Lao Tse's Three Treasures Lao Tse, by the way, had some priorities that it might do for our modern rulers to adopt. He said his three treasures were gentleness, frugality, and not putting himself first. He explained, "Gentleness lets me be bold, frugality enables me to be liberal, not putting myself above others allows me to take the place of highest honor. " He then said, "Now-a-days [2500 years ago!], they give up gentleness for boldness, frugality for liberality, and the hindmost place to be foremost--all ending in death."

Maybe Lao Tse knew what he was talking about after all!

In closing, here is Lao Tse on Over-Government:
"The people starve because overtaxed by officials. This causes famine. The people are hard to govern because they are governed too much. This makes them ungovernable." 75 道德经:民之饥，以其上食税之多，是以饥。民之难治，以其上之有为，是以难治

Well, I hear the bells of nearby Nanputuo Temple ringing; Congress must be back in session. Ommmmmmm.

Reference: Lao Tse's 3 Treasures: 道德经: 我有三宝，持而保之。一曰慈，二曰俭，三曰不敢为天下先。慈故能勇；俭故能广；不敢为天下先，故能成器长。今舍慈且勇；舍俭且广；舍后且先；死矣！
www.amoymagic.com

This Folder is Shared with Other People [ cannot move error]

2009-04-28T17:25:00.005+08:00

Bill Brown .. Xiamen University
This blog entry is not related to Xiamen...but then it again, it is, since we all use computers, and someone out there may be able to help! (By the way, when I came to Xiamen University in 1988, we had no computers in the MBA Center's office, and the Foreign Affair's first computer was one that I put together with parts that I brought in from Hong Kong. How times have changed!).

Here's the problem. With Microsoft Vista, quite often it gives me an error message when I try to moved a folder. A box pops up with the warning "This folder is shared with other people. If you move this folder, it will no longer be shared." It then gives me the option to continue or cancel. If I cancel, it freezes, and if I try to then cancel, I cannot. But a few minutes later (sometime 15 minutes later), I get a message
"Buffer overrun detected! Program:...PowerCinema for TOSHIBA\KERNEL|CLML\CLMLSvc.exe A buffer overrun has been detected which has corrupted the program's internal state. The program cannot safely continue execution and must now be terminated."

One, my folders are NOT shared with anyone else, and I've even closed the Power Cinema Program, which appears to be a Power Problem. But nothing helps. I've even completely disabled the Cyberlink PowerCinema and rebooted; no use. Does anyone have any idea what to do--other than to chuck the computer and send a letter to Osama Bin Laden asking him to pay a visit to Microsoft? Thanks.
Enjoy Amoy-- anyway!
Dr. Bill
www.amoymagic.com

20 Ounces or 12?

2009-04-28T12:11:00.002+08:00

Bill Brown ... Xiamen University
Dr. Tom sent this about stress. Of course, Dr. Tom is one of those folks who forwards several things a day--but this one has some very choice quotes, and deserves to be shared. I especially liked the very last quote--perhaps because I'm always getting sidetracked--but sidetrack or main track, I enjoy the ride! Enjoy.

A lecturer, when explaining stress management to an audience, raised a glass of water and asked, 'How heavy is this glass of water?' Answers called out ranged from 8oz. to 20oz.

The lecturer replied, 'The absolute weight doesn't matter. It depends on how long you try to hold it. If I hold it for a minute, that's not a problem. If I hold it for an hour, I'll have an ache in my right arm. If I hold it for a day, you'll have to call an ambulance.'

'In each case it's the same weight, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes.' He continued, 'And that's the way it is with stress management. If we carry our burdens all the time, sooner or later, as the burden becomes increasingly heavy, we won't be able to carry on.'

'As with the glass of water, you have to put it down for a while and rest before holding it again, when we're refreshed, we can carry on with the burden.'

'So, before you return home tonight, put the burden of work or life down. Don't carry it home. You can pick it up tomorrow. Whatever burdens you're carrying now, let them down for a moment if you can. Relax; pick them up later after you've rested.

‘Life is short. Enjoy!’ And then he shared some ways of dealing with the burden of life:

* Accept that some days you're the pigeon, and some days you're the statue

* Always keep your words soft and sweet, just in case you have to eat them.

* Always read stuff that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it.

* Drive carefully. It's not only cars that can be recalled by their Maker.

* If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.

* If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably worth it.

* It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.

* Never buy a car you can't push.

* Never put both feet in your mouth at the same time, because then you won't have a leg to stand on.

* Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance.

* Since it's the early worm that gets eaten by the bird, sleep late.

* The second mouse gets the cheese.

* When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.

* Birthdays are good for you. The more you have, the longer you live.

* You may be only one person in the world, but you may also be the world to one person.

* Some mistakes are too much fun to only make once.

* We could learn a lot from crayons. Some are sharp, some are pretty and some are dull. Some have weird names and all are different colors, but they all have to live in the same box.

* A truly happy person is one who can enjoy the scenery on a detour.
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Ambassador von Royen in Xiamen!

2009-04-28T10:09:00.003+08:00

Bill Brown .. Xiamen University

Last week, I was very honored to spend two days guiding a team of Dutch tourists around Gulangyu and Xiamen, and one of them was the well-known former Dutch Ambassador to Indonesia, Jan Herman von Royen (accompanied by his wife Caroline). Von Royen was most instrumental in engineering the agreements that gave birth to Indonesian Independence. Below is an article about him.

By the way, von Royen loved Xiamen, but had never heard of it. But when he bought a copy of my book Discover Gulangyu and asked me to sign it, he was shocked to learn that Xiamen was the same as Amoy! Western history books are full of stories about exotic Amoy; there is nothing in Western history about Xiamen. Chinese complain that "Amoy" is a foreign name, but in fact, it is what almost all Overseas Chinese call Xiamen. So if we are to attract the attention of the world, we should use the name Amoy, as well as Xiamen. [Click here for "Why Amoy?"]
Enjoy Amoy!

TIME, Nov.14, 1949: BIRTH OF A NATION
Source is Here
A few hours before dawn, a bleary-eyed night porter at The Hague's stuffy Hotel des Indes (named for The Netherlands' once vast and profitable colonies) opened the heavy oaken door for a weary guest, who went promptly to his room, and to sleep. He was slim, patient Jan Herman van Royen, able career diplomat and chief Dutch troubleshooter at The Hague Round Table Conference, which had been called to settle the differences between Indonesia and The Netherlands (TIME, Sept. 5). Van Royen had just wound up a crucial committee meeting which seemed to assure the conference's success. The way was clear for the birth of a new nation.

Nationalists in Indonesia sputtered that they did not like the agreement which Van Royen and the Indonesian representatives had worked out. Nevertheless, after four years of bitter fighting and endless negotiations, it looked as though Indonesia would get the freedom it fiercely wanted, and yet would retain some of the economic ties with The Netherlands which are necessary for the survival of both countries.

During its ten weary weeks, The Hague conference had often seemed close to failure. The Indonesians had wanted as much independence as possible, the Dutch had wanted to retain as much sovereignty as possible. But eventually the Dutch and the Indonesian delegates grew to trust and understand each other. One weekend motor trip to Namur, in Belgium, helped to break the ice; Indonesia's Premier Mohammed Hatta and the Dutch Minister for Overseas Territories, Johan van Maarseveen, reached some important decisions chatting in their car. Explained Van Royen: "It doesn't pay to try to be too clever. The only way to gain confidence is to treat people as normal equals. The fortunate thing is that our interests run parallel. They can't do without us, nor we without them."

One of the thorniest problems of the conference was the public debt incurred by the Dutch administration in Indonesia, which the new republic would have to take over. The Dutch had originally set the figure at 6.3 billion guilders ($1.7 billion), but the U.N. Commission on Indonesia, which hovered anxiously over The Hague talks, helped persuade the Dutch to scale down their demands to 4.3 billion ($1.1 billion). Another tough nut was the future of New Guinea, a large part of which is still held by Dutch troops. Under the compromise which Van Royen had engineered, both parties agreed to defer a decision on New Guinea for a year.
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Xiamen Vacation!

2009-04-26T00:41:00.000+08:00

Bill Brown ... Xiamen University
A few years ago, Sue and I decided that since we are always encouraging people to visit Xiamen, we should visit it ourselves! Of course, we've lived here since 1988 so we should know our own town well, especially since I've written so many books about it. But like most people, we tend to take our own home for granted, so we set out to experience Xiamen like a tourist, and we came away with an even greater appreciation of this magic little island.

Off Season Specials During the off seasons, many local Xiamen hotels with low occupancy rates are delighted to give a discount rate to locals who want to explore their own home, and Sue and I checked into a hotel by Yuandang Lagoon on Friday afternoon, and spent until Sunday exploring the beauty of the Night Lights on the lake, and the scenery, classic colonial architecture, and shops on Gulangyu Island. We rode a tandem bicycle to enjoy the unmatched scenery of the Island Ring Road, and walked along our beautiful Xiamen Board Walk. Xiamen also of course has dozens of fine parks and gardens, the finest being the 10,000 Rock Botanical Garden, which has more rocks than our Xiamen University cafeteria rice. We explored the old back streets of downtown Xiamen, in some ways unchanged for centuries, but in others (the chic shops, for instance) so different from the town I knew a mere decade ago.

We also enjoyed sampling the many great restaurants. Though I moved to China only because Chinese food was too expensive in America, I also enjoy sampling the other cuisines from dozens of nations—Vietnamese, French, Italian, American (if there is such a thing as American cuisine).

Sue and I had such a great time that we have made it our goal to vacation in Xiamen at least once every three months!

It just goes to prove… there’s no place like home!

My Favorite! Xiamen Millennium Harbourview Hotel

Millennium Hotel's Official Website
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Dutch Retake Xiamen & Tigers

2009-04-26T00:01:00.005+08:00

Bill Brown ... Xiamen University

The Dutch Recapture Amoy!
Well, I've found my new career--Tour Guide! I've been asked many times over the years to guide groups, especially on Gulangyu, but I've never done it, except for family and friends (and the U.S. Ambassador a couple years ago). But Mr. Olivier Sieuw, in Beijing, asked me several times to lead a group of 11 Dutch folk on a tour of historic Gulangyu colonial architecture--and it turned out to be a lot of fun. What was really surprising was that one of the guests, who was a former Dutch Ambassador, had no idea that Xiamen used to be Amoy until I signed his copy of "Discover Gulangyu" with "Enjoy Amoy."

The group fell in love with Xiamen, once they came to understand our rich history, and centuries of relations with Europe. And the former Dutch Ambassador told me that he saw in an antique market in Holland a beautiful large oil painting of Amoy harbor in the 19th century, with foreign ships flying their flags of many nations! He'll try to get a photo of it for me, and permission to use it in my upcoming book "Old Xiamen in Foreigners' Eyes."

The Dutch group were surprised to learn that the Netherlands and Amoy have a history together of almost 500 years, and that the Chinese-European Art Center at Xiamen University was started by a lady from Holland, Mrs. Ineke Gudmundsson.

But one thing the Dutch had a hard time believing was that Xiamen had tigers right on Xiamen island and Gulangyu Island! I told them the story of little Nancy Theobold finding the tiger in her backyard on Gulangyu. And below are a couple of tidbits about Amoy Tigers (or South China Tiger, but called Amoy Tiger because this is the area they roamed). By the way....a friend of mine had an aunt killed by a man--eating tiger not far from Xiamen--in the 1960s.

TAME CHINESE TIGER in AMOY!
(by Miss D’Almeida, 1863, p. 285)
A gentleman took us to see a young tiger, between six and seven months old, which was so tame that it followed him about like a dog, and seemed quite pleased when we patted his head. The gentleman told us he paid ten dollars for him when he was first caught, a few months prior to the time we saw him, and that he had now sold him to the English Consul for a hundred pounds. I believe it is intended for the Zoological Gardens in London, where it will figure as the first from China ever seen there, and where we may some day renew our acquaintance with the tiger of Amoy.

“Mr. H. R. Bruce brought into Amoy the largest tiger that had ever been seen in that place, measuring over nine feet from nose to tip of tail.”
September 20th, 1888. Diary of Events in the Far East, Chinese Recorder, Vol. 19, Nov., 1888, p. 540

"Two things in Fukien impressed Marco Polo: the beauty of the women and the size of its tigers." Mackenzie-Grieves, 1959, p. 69

Chinese Vampires in Old Xiamen! (Think tigers are bad? Check out the true story of these horrible creatures!).
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Napoleon of Nanputuo Temple! (Xiamen)

2009-04-24T18:20:00.009+08:00

Bill Brown .. Xiamen University

Napoleon seemed to think he was god--and evidently so did the Chinese--at least here in old Amoy (former name for Xiamen). In the succinctly entitled book published in 1853, "An Aide-De-Camp's Recollections of Service in China, A Residence in Hong-Kong, and Visits to Other Islands in the Chinese Seas," by Colonel Arthur Augustus Thurlow Cunynghame,

"There is still one very superb temple, [Nanputuo Temple] by far the best specimen I had yet met with. This, as usual, was filled with gods and demons of all denominations and attributes. The entree of these figures does not appear to be exclusively restricted to Chinese deities, a clay statue of Napoleon having been found in one of their temples at Amoy, in his cocked-hat and boots; how he got there, it would be difficult to determine." "(p.115)

I've not seen the Napoleon idol, but Nanputuo Temple has literally thousands of idols. It may well have been spirited off by some idle British soldier during their occupation of our fair isle of Amoy. I'll still have a go at looking for it, but I suspect it could well be in the British Museum in London, which has millions of artifacts from all over the world, hundreds of which were honestly acquired.

Who knows--maybe it was the Amoy folks' worship of Napoleon that led to the idea of the People's Liberation Army Temple in Quanzhou's walled city of Chongwu--a very unique temple with little green statues of --no, not leprechauns--27 PLA soldiers, replete in green uniforms, and surrounded by incense, fresh fruit and dried fruits and candies, and offerings of booze, soft drinks, cigarettes, and even cell phones and toy plastic tanks, helicopters, battleships and aircraft carriers (Just saw on the news yesterday China wants to build a real aircraft carrier).

But if you find the Napoleon of Nanputuo Temple, please let me know!

Dr. Bill
Some Fujian Temples
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I Wanna Hold Your Hand!

2009-04-23T21:20:00.003+08:00

Bill Brown ...
Adapted from "Magic Xiamen--Guide to Xiamen"
Copyright Bill Brown

I nearly fell off my trusty rusty Forever Brand bike when I saw a gate guard sitting in another’s lap, arms about him, eyes locked intimately.

Chinese men are very intimate -- unlike us Westerners who religiously defend our inviolable body space (about 30 inches, according to space cases who study such stuff).

Chinese view privacy and body space differently because with 1.3 billion people there isn’t a lot of room for either one. Men have no qualms holding hands, arms, or bodies, which is all well and good for Chinese who know the ropes, but not for foreigners.

Consider the simple handshake. Americans grab, squeeze, pump for oil 3 times, and escape, but Chinese may grab your hand and hold it intimately in theirs, even stroking it throughout the entire conversation. It still unnerves me, even after 12 years.

I eventually gave a lecture on how not to shake hands or other body parts with unsuspecting Laowai. And the very next day, I ran into Foreign Affair’s Lao Huang, (Lao means “old” or “venerable”), one of my sons' favorite Chinese grandfathers, and handholder par excellence.

Lao Huang grasped my hand and caressed it for a good 15 minutes while he chatted away. He eventually asked, “Xiao Pan” (which means “Little Pan,” not “Unvenerable Pan”), “Do you feel awkward holding my hand?”

“A tad,” I confessed.

He roared with laughter, threw his arms about me (that I could handle), and confessed, “I heard about your hand-holding lecture yesterday!”

And ever since then, the old rascal has greeted me with an American pumping-for-oil handshake—and a sly chuckle.
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100 Mayors TV

2009-04-17T22:42:00.007+08:00

Bill Brown ... Xiamen University
This afternoon, I was one of 3 guests on a TV special, "100 Wenming City Mayors," 《百位市长》， with Mayor Liu Cigui. I've never figured out a good way to translate "wenming." Civilized? Cultured? Since I helped Xiamen win the international Livcom Award in 2002 in Stuttgart, Germany, the city has gone on to win numerous other international honors, including the coveted U.N. Habitat award (I was impressed too, once it was explained to me; I had thought habitats were what you put hamsters in).

I'm surprised at all of the changes in Xiamen even over the past year. I didn't know we had almost 100,000 Taiwan residents in Xiamen now! Makes sense, though; 3/4 of Taiwanese are from S. Fujian anyway.

I also saw a middle school student who wrote a letter of complaint to the mayor about environment problems in relatively remote Xiang An (where the undersea tunnel will end up; Xiamen University is building an extension there, and Xiamen YMCA was talking about building some kind of retreat center out there).

But back to the student who complained...she was shocked when Mayor Liu gave her a handwritten response, and then showed up at her home to see first hand what she had complained about. She said, "What we can do for ourselves, we should do for ourselves--but if we can't handle it, the government should." And, I suppose, they did!

I gave a short talk, and was glad they can edit it. I forgot the very first paragraph and after stumbling, grabbed my notes out of my pocket, reviewed them, and then went on--fairly smoothly from there. Even after 21 years here, I'm still not a "natural" at doing TV in Chinese--though this time I did the first few lines in the Amoy Dialect, which was fun. And that's probably why I forgot the rest of the lines. It's still my dream to take some time to study the dialect for a year or two. Maybe when I retire?

I enclose my talk below. I only have it in Chinese, but basically I say we love Xiamen, it's changed a lot in 20 years, I've been to over 100 cities in over 30 countries and lived in a dozen, but Xiamen is one of the most special--and more and more foreigners thinks so as well, and want to move here from Shanghai, Guangzhou, etc. because they not only want business success but a good living environment for their family--and Xiamen gives us that. I also threw in for free that our sons love Xiamen as well, and that Shannon, who works at the Xiamen Millennium Harbourview Hotel, just married a beautiful local Xiamen girl (and showed a photo of Shannon and our beautiful new daughter), and I said that I hope they get busy and give us some Sino-Chinese grandkids soon. And that was about it. Except for taking a couple of breaths here and there.

The photo, by the way, is of them making me up for the program. Someone said, "He doesn't need make-up. He's white enough!" Chinese, as you know, think the whiter the better. But the make-up girl said, "We're making him darker, not lighter."

我爱厦门（普通话），我是厦门人（闽南话）。我们全家是1988年来到厦门的，从来到这里的第一天起，我们就有一种感觉。我曾经走访了30多国家的数百个城市，并且在其中的十几个城市居住过，但我感觉厦门市世界上最好的城市之一。
实际上，许多在这里的外国人也赞同这个观点。十几年前，很少有外国人会待在厦门超过一两年。现在，厦门变得如此美好，很多人都不愿意离开了。

每周我都要受到好几封电子邮件，咨询来厦门访问的事。现在的厦门，在城市建设与发展上不亚于欧美一些先进城市，甚至在某些方面比美国，欧洲的一些知名城市还要好。

现在，不仅是我和妻子决定在厦门过一辈子，我们的两个儿子也有同样打算。我的大儿子娶了厦门姑娘做老婆，现在在厦门千禧海景酒店工作。我还要介绍更多的外国人来厦门参观访问。我经常收到读过我的书或者访问我介绍厦门网站的外国人给我来的信，他们希望移居厦门。他们中的许多人已经在中国的上海或广州生活过，并希望留在中国。同时，他们也想在商业上有发展，给他们的家庭提供一个良好环境，正如厦门提供给我的环境一样。

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Xiamen-Hotel California of China (1860s)

2009-03-20T11:52:00.003+08:00

Bill Brown ... Xiamen University
Our family expected to spend a year or two in Xiamen and we're still here 21 years later, but Xiamen has been the "Hotel California of China" since at least the 1860s. You can check out any time you want, but you can never leave--and probably won't want to!
Enjoy Amoy!
Dr. Bill

Why Seven Becomes Fourteen!
From Boehm, Lise, “China Coast Tales,” Kelly and Walsh Limited, Shanghai, 1897. “In the Sixties,” Part 1, page 1-3 pp. 7,8

As everyone in China knows, at the end of his first seven years of service a Customs Assistant may apply for two years' leave on half-pay, which period he may spend anywhere usually "at home," viz. Europe his return passage to China being paid for him. But of those Assistants who may take their leave, under such favourable conditions, there are a great many who do not find themselves in a position to do so, and this in spite of having received regular and excellent pay during their period of service. At the end of his first seven years in China a man has often saved nothing, his brain having been turned by the mere possession of money, seemingly inexhaustible to one who has perhaps been brought up in narrow circumstances. Or, he has been bitten rabidly by what is known as "Sinology," and lives, speaks, thinks, and dreams of nothing but the Chinese language and literature. Or, he has been drawn into the ring of speculators, and has risked, even if he has not lost, all his savings in strange and wonderful mines and companies. Or, he is drinking himself into an untimely grave. And as it is far easier to live on nothing at all, and to die leaving your family to your friends, or to be a Chinese student, or to be a speculator, or to be a hard drinker, in the East than in the West, the man of seven years generally stays out fourteen.

note from Bill...
There you have it, folks! Even 150 years ago, Xiamen was the Hotel California of China! But what a delightful place to be stuck.
Enjoy Amoy!
www.amoymagic.com

Spring Cleaning in Xiamen, 1860s

2009-03-20T11:48:00.003+08:00

Bill Brown ... Xiamen University
While working on my "Old Xiamen in Foreigners' Eyes" book, I came across Lise Boehm's delightful account of Spring Cleaning in Amoy in the 1860s....
Enjoy Amoy!

Boehm, Lise, “China Coast Tales,” Kelly and Walsh Limited, Shanghai, 1897. “In the Sixties,” Part 1, page 1-3
…a grand cleaning, scrubbing and dusting had been going on for a fortnight in the house of the Commissioner of Imperial Maritime Customs, Amoy, South China.

Now the Commissioner was a man who usually left his servants to do just as much, or as little, as they chose to do. His was precisely the establishment a Chinaman delights in, where there is no troublesome "missisy" to demand monthly, weekly, or even daily accounts, to compare expenses with some experienced friend, and to generally make herself obnoxious. Provided his meals were served punctually, Mr. Watkins was fairly indifferent as to what he was made to swallow. Provided his own particular armchair held together, he did not care if the rest of his furniture was allowed to crumble away through neglect or white ants.

Such was the normal state of Mr. Watkins and of Mr. Watkins' household for eleven months in every year.

But when the twelfth month, marked in the calendar as May, came round, the aspect of the great dreary house on the top of the hill changed. Every available coolie, both in Mr. Watkins' house and in his office, every Customs boatman, every watchman, every odd man, was pressed into the work of cleaning.

The odour of carbolic fluids, of patent soaps and insect-destroying powders pervaded the whole compound, and made the house smell like the disinfecting ward of a hospital. Scrubbing cloths and dusting brushes, sufficient to last an ordinary Chinese household for a generation, were recklessly given out. Mosquito-nets were repaired, centipedes and lizards were terrified from their resting places, boxes of stores arrived from Hongkong, the official servants received fresh uniforms, and Mr. Watkins himself spent a whole day picking out white trousers, and coats which were neither frayed at the cuffs, nor shaky about the buttonholes, nor badly ironmoulded. For Mrs. Ratcliff was expected for her yearly visit.

Everybody in China knew Mrs. Ratcliff, or at any rate knew all about her…. (read the book to find out just what everyone knew about her, and why her annual pilgrimage to Mr. Watkin's home in Amoy so titillated the foreign community...
And, again, Enjoy Amoy!

www.amoymagic.com

Xiamen 4th of July, 1891

2009-03-17T17:40:00.003+08:00

Bill Brown ... Xiamen University
With the U.S.'s increased presence in Xiamen (former Amoy), and 4th of July only a few months away, I was startled this afternoon, while working on my book about Xiamen history, to come across this article about a 4th of July celebration in Xiamen in 1891. What is really amazing are the Fujian governor's prescient remarks about the role of the U.S. and China in the coming 20th century. With a little revision, they still hold true--as do the hopes for our two countries peaceful cooperation. Bill

Amoy 4th of July, 1891--a Toast to America & China
[Chinese Recorder, Vol. 23, January, 1892 p. 18]
"China's Power.—At the celebration of the Fourth of July at Amoy, China, by the Americans, the governor of the province was invited to the banquet, and made a remarkable speech, which shows his intelligence, and suggests some things worthy of consideration.

"Tsin Chin-chung was called upon to respond to the toast, 'The Emperor of China.' In part he said: 'China, having followed its own principles of advancement during more than 5000 years, is now compelled to change and move along European channels. It has begun to own steamships and railways. Its telegraph now covers every province. It has mills, forges and foundries like those of Essen, of Sheffield and of Pittsburgh. China is to-day learning that lesson in education which Europe has obliged her to learn,—the art of killing, the science of armies and navies. Woe, then, to the world if the scholar, profiting by her lesson, should apply it in turn. With its freedom from debt, its inexhaustible resources and its teeming millions, this empire might be the menace, if not the destroyer, of Christendom. No matter what happens, it needs no prophetic gift to know that the 20th century will see at the forefront of the nations of the world,—China in the East and America in the West. Well may we pray that, for the welfare of humanity, their purposes will be as peaceful and upright as to-day.'"
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Western Food in Xiamen (1856)

2009-02-26T11:58:00.002+08:00

Bill Brown ... Xiamen University
There are endless varieties of cuisine now available in Xiamen restaurants--everything from Mexican at Coyote Cafe to my favorite Western (and healthiest), the AFD Cafe, which is run by Hungarian-Australian Alex and wife Fuji, and offers tasty (and very healthy) dishes such as pasta, fish, Hungarian goulash, pizzas, beef and veggy burgers--and the best and most authentic Australian meat pies in town. But 150 years ago the foreigners here in Amoy also lived pretty high on the hog, as we can see from these accounts of Western dining in Xiamen in 1856:

Western Food in Xiamen (1856!)

Monday, Oct. 8^th, “You may like to know if foreigners get enough to eat in this part of the world, and so I will tell you what we had on the dinner-table this evening. We had first soup, fish baked, roast goose, boiled mutton, stewed beef, and several kinds of vegetables; then we had puddings, marmalade, cheese and beer, plantains, five kinds of nuts, persimmons, guavas, pumaloes, four kinds of preserves, etc., and the various wines, and lastly we had coffee. It was seven in the evening when we sat down to dinner. Mr. L and I drank to the Queen, and then to the President of the United States, etc. … When I left, which was half past twelve, the moon shone brightly overhead, lighting up the whole interior of the court. Attracted by its silvery appearance, the cool air, and the quiet and deathlike stillness, I took a seat on the stone steps, and enjoyed the tranquility of the place alone. Completely shut out from the street.—for the doors at the bottom of the court were closed—the buildings seemed like a kind of palace. I am told that it was formerly the residence of the Chinese governor of this province, and everything is laid out, handsomely arranged, befitting his station.

Sat. Oct. 12^th, Dined at Rev. Mr. Young’s, and made, I believe, the most of my meal on plum-pudding and plum-cake, which much reminded me of home.

Friday, Oct. 19^th, “A few mornings since, at the breakfast table, Mr. T made some amusement by his explanation of a peculiarity in the Chinese mode of cooking. He had helped me to a dish which I had never before seen. While partaking of it with good appetite, he asked me how I liked the “beef scallop.

To this I answered, “Very well.”

It seemed to consist of beef-steak cut and pounded up very fine, without potatoes or seasoning, and it had little positive taste of any kind. He said, “I presume you know how the cook prepares this dish?”

I answered honestly that “I did not know.”

He continued with a plausible air, “Well, I can tell you. The Chinese cooks have no chopping knives, and, as a substitute, they chew the food fine, in their own mouths.”

I partook of it afterwards, adding vinegar, but I must say that my appetite for the dish was diminished. Still I was determined not to be induced by my imagination to give it up. Mr. B., I noticed, ate and swallowed with some difficulty, and probably I did myself. After a painful suspense of some minutes, Mr. T. observed, by way of climax, “Gentlemen, don’t be afraid of it; I never allow my cooks to use tobacco whatever!”

We laid down our knives and forks, and Mr. T enjoyed a good laugh while we gave our plates to the servants to be changed, and passed to the next dish. After that I did not taste of the beef scallop—at least for several days.”

At dinner one day we had some tripe served up in a new style, according to the Chinese method; and the looks and odor of it were more disagreeable than our imaginations pictured the scallop, or any other article of food I have yet seen. Some quite amusing remarks were elicited by the presence of this dish. Ball, 1856

Ball, Benjamin Lincoln, “Rambles in Eastern Asia: Including China and Manila, During Several Years Residence,” James French and Company, Boston, 1856

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Famished at the Feast

2009-02-26T11:09:00.004+08:00

Bill Brown ... Xiamen University Copyright 1999-2009
Adapted from "Magic Xiamen--Guide to Xiamen and Fujian"
Also see Strange Creature Cuisin (1880s)

Famished at the Feast. While many foreigners like eating rice with their meat and vegetables, Chinese eating out often don’t want rice at all. They order only what they don’t get at home—like jellyfish and seaworms, pickled piggy toes, and stewed duck webs. These exotic delicacies may well tantalize the taste buds but they don’t stick to the ribs, and you can easily find yourself famished at the end of a 20 course feast unless you can top it off with a plate or two of rice or noodles. And herein lays the problem.

Unless you hound the waitresses, they won’t serve the rice until the very end, and plain, white rice is not the most appealing way to top off a meal (except for our youngest son Matthew, who has been in China since he was six months old and therefore has taken leave of some critical faculties).

You must beg the waiter, “Please bring the rice first!” (Qǐng Bǎ Mǐfàn Xiān Shàng! (请把米饭先上!). They will happily reply, “Hǎole! Hǎole!” (好了,好了! Okay!), but their brains in no way hear what their lips are saying. Chinese don’t order rice and so they cannot believe you would either, so you must hound them for it, and even then you’ll probably still end up getting rice only as your just desserts.

A waitress in Xiàmén’s finest foreign-run hotel (you guess which one) agreed three times to bring the rice and we still did not get it until after we’d paid. Then she had the nerve to suggest a doggy bag for the rice.

We’ve entreated the Xiàmén University restaurant waitresses, several times a week, for years, to bring the rice first. Only in the last few months have they given in. In fact, now they often plop bowls of white rice in front of us even before they take our order—and then we get to stare at white rice until the entrees arrive half an hour later. But cold rice is better than no rice.

Stranger Creature Cuisine (1880s)

2009-02-26T10:58:00.004+08:00

Bill Brown ... Xiamen University
Major Henry Knolly's, who wrote "English Life in China," (1885) was obviously not fond of China or Chinese. I would blush to share some of the disparaging things he wrote of both. Still, he was very descriptive in his writings, and I've attended enough of 3-hour culinary marathons over the years, in which we're fed every part of an animal but the meat itself, that I can appreciate his account of a Chinese banquet--and especially his closing statement of having eaten his fill and still being hungry. I wrote about being "Famished at the Feast" in the booki, Magic Xiamen--Guide to Xiamen & Fujian".

Major Knolly's Chinese Banquet:
In course of time relays of hot dishes are brought steaming from the kitchen, and set down in the centre of the table. Bird's-nest soup, of course an expensive luxury which is never wanting in really recherché dinners. It is not a mass of twigs, moss, and feathers, but a clean, clear fluid with a yellow tinge, a slightly gelatinous consistency, and about as insipid to the palate as dissolved isinglass. Nothing except in thought to disgust one here, and as we are supplied with little scoops like porcelain medicine spoons, I am not behindhand in the swallowing race. Shark's fins humph! pulpy and viscous, one need be hungry to enjoy them. Toadstools— they look spotted and deadly poisonous, but Sir James Paget assures me that they are nutritious as beef steak. Fishes' maws, that is, the lower lips stewed into a snail-looking broth. Ugh! all this mixture of unwonted food in however small quantities, together with the heat, the charged atmosphere, and the 'bouquet de Chinois,' is beginning to make me feel thoroughly squeamish. Still the women, who by the way annoy me by hawking, hemming, and expectorating as incessantly as a forty-year-old Frenchwoman, in keen amusement ply their chopsticks in my behalf. Shark-fin, toadstool, fish's maw. 'Stop, please' (half choking), 'I cannot eat any more.' But as I open my mouth in enunciation of despairing remonstrance, one last tit-bit is thrust in a pigeon's egg, and a pigeon's egg which, according to Chinese ideas of dainty dishes, had acquired a peculiar relish by having been preserved for twenty years. I hesitate no longer….

But to think how our repast made us not one whit ill the next day.' The secret of this was that about half a mouthful of each dish more than satisfied our appetites, and that thus the aggregate of food consumed was so small that practically we went to bed dinnerless. The whole experience was one to be eagerly sought out for once, but to be resolutely avoided on a second occasion.

Knollys, Major Henry, “English Life in China,” Smith, Elder & Company, London, 1885, pp. 289,290

www.amoymagic.com

U.S. Guangzhou Consulate Move to Xiamen?

2009-02-24T22:03:00.004+08:00

Bill Brown ... Xiamen University
Well, I'm afraid the Guangzhou U.S. Consulate is not, as of yet, moving to Xiamen--but they should! What a beautiful location they had on our Gulangyu Islet, and I just read that our illustrious U.S. Consul, le Gendre, wrote way back in 1871 that the U.S. Consul for not just Fujian but Guangzhou and Taiwan as well should be located in Xiamen, the "doorway to Fookien." (See quote & source below). So send in your e-mails to the U.S. Consulate. I'm sure those poor folks down there would Enjoy Amoy much better than smoggy Guangzhou. And in the meantime, visit the official America in Xiamen web page.

“Amoy, the door to the Fookien Province, as its name in Chinese indicates, would be the proper residence for a Consul whose jurisdiction would extend over agents of Swatow [Shantou] and Vice Consuls for the Formosa ports.”

Carles, William Le Gendre, U.S. Consul in Amoy, “How to Deal with China. A Letter to de B. Rand. Kiem, Esquire, Agent of the United States, Amoy, 1871, p. 118

www.amoymagic.com

Xiamen Typhoon (1920s)

2009-02-24T18:18:00.002+08:00

Bill Brown ... Xiamen University
In 1999, a newly arrived American family with Kodak asked me worriedly if the coming typhoon would be bad. "No," I said. "Never a problem. Taiwan always blocks us from them. Besides, locals say the statue of Koxinga on Gulangyu Islet protects us. And so of course Typhoon Dan was the worst typhoon since the 1950s, and devastated the island. It took me 4 hours just to cut my way out of our apartment up on the hillside, which took the brunt.

Ann Mackenzie-Grieves, who lived on Gulangyu in the 1920s, wrote this vivid description of an Amoy typhoon ("Race of Green Ginger," pp. 137-139):

The black ball on the signal station was so familiar a punctuation of our summer horizon that it almost ceased to signify. Typhoons there were, but they passed on up the Formosa Strait. 'The great wind will not pass us today'; our old gardener paused, straddling under the weight of a potted camellia he was carrying under the house....

The sea stretched like lead from waveless edges, the air was motionless. I wanted to hurry into the water, but I was weighed down, pouring with sweat. It had never been quite like this before. A puff of wind lifted the bamboo leaves leaning over the French Consulate wall. Almost at once they fell back into immobility. Stillness and silence were fused; even the cicadas had stopped boring into it. 'Come on, if you're coming.' I saw Cyril's head and shoulders against an empty roadstead. Far out, a few ships were making for open water. Uneasiness invaded me.

'Swim to the raft and back, and then let's go home.'

Just as we reached the garden gate, the trees shook in another spasm like a woman in labour, but the silence swallowed the wind. Lee stood on the bare and battened veranda looking anxious.

'Come quickly.' A second gust swept away his words, but still with a sort of ominous gentleness. Then, quite suddenly, we were shouting as the wind attacked with a roar composed of its own impetus through the trees, the ripping and rending of branches, the clatter ofairborne debris.

'Suddenly the wild horses were galloping madly, compelling six fish-hawks to fly backwards.'

'What on earth ... ?' To me, watching a crack spreading in the sitting-room ceiling, Cyril sounded slightly demented.

'Su Tung-p'o. Quoting the classics as usual-Kung Yang-kao, I think, but I'll just check it.' He fetched a copy of the Fu and began looking for the typhoon essay. The cracks above us were travelling like snakes across the ceiling.

'Why backwards?' But it was the cracks I was thinking of. The rain was hissing in the wind as it pounded the shutters. The house heaved and shook. We sat beleaguered.

'1 say, just listen to this, it's fascinating,' Cyril shouted, holding SU Tung-p'0 close to his face for the electric light had gone out. '"My guest said: this is only the beginning of the typhoon. In a short time it was beating open doors and crashing against the windows, bringing down the tiles in pieces and belabouring the house." What's so amazing about these chaps is that they don't date. . . .' Then the whole of the middle of the ceiling falling on us, cut classical comparisons short.

In the evening we went out to a stripped, skeletal island, lying under a clear indifferent sky. Not a leaf on the bamboos, bare banyan branches, bare roof timbers, flattened walls, mounds and drifts of matting, of tiles, of the most unexpected household objects. In the charming sunlit bay wreckage littered the shore: spars, oars, pieces of fish baskets, brilliant, fragile flower heads, and among them, like a Dali picture, a human foot. In the city lay acres of match-wood, and among it junks, carried incongruously there on wind and flood, leaned horribly this way and that. 'It is even worse than an army passing,' Lee said.
www.amoymagic.com

International Settlements in China?

2009-02-24T11:07:00.004+08:00

Bill Brown ... Xiamen University
International Settlements, such as that on our own Gulangyu Islet a century ago, were indeed self-governed foreign enclaves, where both foreigners and rich Chinese could live above the Chinese law. But the idea for these settlements initially came from the Chinese, not the foreigners--though foreigners carried it much further than Chinese intended, basically setting themselves above the law anywhere in China. Even when our family arrived in Xiamen in 1988, foreigners were not allowed to live with Chinese. We were housed in the "Holiday Village", which was chained and padlocked every night from 11 PM to 7 AM--from the outside (for our safety, we were told). I asked what happened in case of fire and was told that they'd unlock it. We'd have never imagined back then how completely Xiamen would change, and open up, over the next 20 years.

As far as we know, our family was the first in Xiamen to be allowed to live in "Chinese" housing, but today it is the norm. Foreign teachers at Xiamen University are given a housing allowance and allowed to rent any place they desire. Some foreigners even purchase apartments or villas. The only requirement is that they register their address with the local police (the same requirement made of Chinese).

What a change from 20 years ago--or 80 years ago, when Ann Mackenzie-Grieves wrote about international settlements in her book "A Race of Green Ginger" (she lived on Gulangyu in the 1920s):

To hear the students one would have thought that the foreign settlements had been a wicked invention of the Western traders and imperialists. Actually, since the Portuguese began trading with the southern Chinese in the sixteenth century, Chinese relationship with the foreigners had been entirely governed by China's own system of administrative responsibility. The foreigners proved far easier to control in a settlement of their own, under their own headman, who, like a Chinese civil governor, could be held entirely responsible for their behaviour. During the next two centuries the arrangement worked well. There were times when both Chinese and Westerners behaved badly: unlettered Manchu successors of the Ming scholar-officials were arbitrary and obstinate; hectoring British traders abused privileges, flouted the custom and courtesy so vital to Chinese relationships; tough sea-captains resorted to violence. On the whole, however, it was to the advantage of both sides to abide by the rules. But the immunity of extra-territoriality accorded to the foreigners in their own enclaves began to be extended to, and claimed by, Chinese living in the concessions and, with the increasing corruption and misgovernment of nineteenth-century China, Chinese ships found it safer to sail under foreign flags. Smugglers, both foreign and local, sailed profitably under any flag they could buy, and strengthened their alliance with the pirates….
Mackenzie-Grieves, 1959, pp. 101,102.

www.amoymagic.com

Chang Gung Hospital 厦门长庚医院

2009-02-20T22:36:00.007+08:00

Bill Brown ... Xiamen University
Xiamen Chang Gung Hospital (厦门长庚医院)--#1!
Over 20+ years in Xiamen our biggest concerns as a family have been education and quality medical care. We home-schooled the boys (though Xiamen now has the excellent Xiamen International School ), but for medical care we were generally at a loss as to what to do. Basically, we avoided the hospitals unless we were really sick--but if we were really sick we then didn't dare go to the hospital. Sort of a catch-22 there. But happily, we now have the excellent Taiwan-run Chang Gung Hospital in Haicang, Xiamen! My wife has been there many times, had excellent care, and taken a half dozen friends. Click Here to learn more. And below is a letter I just received from one of our fellow Xiamen laowai.

Dr, Bill

Thank you for the information regarding the new Hospital in Haican.g I had to go there today to visit a specialist for a brief check up and a for a couple of minors health issues. I had some problems with the Xiamen bus to Haichan but once there everybody spoke a little English and were extremely pleasant. My young doctor also was very thorough and explained everything in good English. Total cost for a visit, ultrasounds, urine test. blood pressure weekly medication plus free return bus to my door in Xiamen was less than 100 rmb. Well, you were quite correct in praising this establishment. Well done Chang Gun Hospital
J.C.

Read these great Ancient Chinese Doctor Jokes!
Click for Xiamen Hospitals

Click for Xiamen Dentists and Dental Care
(厦门国际学校)

Xiamen International School

www.amoymagic.com

中国——我们的红娘 - 潘维廉博士（美）

2009-02-20T06:21:00.007+08:00

潘维廉博士。。。。厦门大学工商管理中心
（Copyright2006-2009， Bill Brown）
刘海燕译 —— (英文)
Click for English of "China--our Matchmaker"

（若不是出于对中国共同的兴趣，我可能永远也不会遇到我那金发碧眼，美丽动人的台湾太太。故事是这样的……）

小学五年级的时候，我被逼得在合唱队里女声部唱歌，因为我那清脆如银铃般的“女高音”是全校最高亢的。男同学都开我的玩笑，“比尔是个女孩！”。那时，我是多么盼望青春期的到来啊，我就可以拥有一副男人味实足的嗓音了。

我的愿望实现地太快了。悦耳的银铃碎了，取而代之的是沙哑的，变声期嗓音。而现在，青春期像报复我似的离我远去了。我也不讨厌那些拥有银铃般嗓音的日子了。我声嘶力竭地想把那些原来易如反掌的高音唱上去，但白费功夫。高八度是没有希望了，我就这样随随便便地被逐出了伊甸园。

很久以前，婚姻都是父母做主的。男孩儿根本不用发愁怎么约会女孩儿。现在就不同了，要是她不同意怎么办。就算她同意了也未必是好事，接下来又该怎么办呢？是请她吃饭、看电影、看球赛，还是去滑冰？是牵手好呢，还是不牵好？要不要亲她一下，亲的话，哪儿好呢，嘴巴还是脸颊？下定决心要在约会结束的时候吻别一下，但是最终还是犹豫了，竟以握手告终，搞得就和商人谈成一笔生意似的，太窘了！

就是单单和女生坐在一起，对大力神赫拉克勒斯也是个挑战，别说是一般人。你鼓起勇气慢慢地，装作漫不经心地把你的手臂搭在她的肩上，从侧面察言观色。如果她微微一笑，那你胜券在握，但要是她皱眉头，你得马上把你那“不听话”的手抽回来，紧张地搓搓潮湿的手掌，望着天空，赶紧说：“今天，天气不错哦！”。若是，她对你的行为表示鼓励呢，接下来怎么办呐？

25岁那年，受够了女人的我，我决心“戒掉”女人。我以钢铁般的意志，“两眼不见如花女，一心只读教科书”。我整天就穿梭于宿舍、教室、图书馆、食堂四个地方。但是，这决心就只坚持了两个星期。1981年的复活节，我在台湾结识的一对夫妇邀请我和另外几个年轻人去家中做客。从此，我走向了自己未知的命运。

刚跨进他们家大门，我的目光就定在一位年轻的美女身上，再也移不开了。这位美女有着碧蓝深邃的眸子，一头亚麻色的秀发如倾泻的瀑布一般，落在她白蓝相间的滑雪衫上。我像是被催眠了，故作镇定地从她身边走过，但是她的一颦一笑，一举一动却深深地印在我的心间。虽然，装的和没事儿人一样，但我还是差点撞到了墙上。

我特想和她说话，但整个下午她周围都有群大胆的家伙。眼看就到了晚上，她看都没看我一眼，直到我朋友跟在场的人们讲，前一天晚上县里的救生员想把我从 300米高悬崖的半山腰救出，他们的手电却没电了，反而是我救了一个队员一命。我的女神好奇地望着我，我暗自庆幸：“太好了，现在她知道，我是条硬汉。”

接着这家的主人说：“苏，你知道么，比尔曾在台湾待过，还想去中国大陆呢？”

“是么？”她很惊讶。“你是什么时候去台湾的？”

我突然觉得口干舌燥，着急上火。比尔，别搞砸，慢慢来。扮指头算算有几年，手指头不够就上脚么。“哦，是从1978年6月到1976年6月，”我说。“不不，是从76年到78年。你去过台湾么？”

“我就生长在台湾啊！”她笑着说。“可惜，76年6月到78年6月这段时间我在美国，我们刚好错过！”

这是我们之间意义深刻的“破冰对话”，从此以后我就一头栽进对她的爱恋中，再也无法自拔。

说起我们共同的爱好——中国，我们一谈就是好几个小时。当苏说她打算圣诞节去看她的父母，我立刻就编了一条也要去台湾的理由。“那我们一起吧。”后来，我无意中听到她的车坏了，我毫不犹豫地就把我的车借给了她。虽然，我穿着旱冰鞋滑到学校，但是这样一来，我就又有借口和她再见面了2。其实，我是不用担心啦，她答应了周五晚上和我一起看免费的校园音乐会。

那五天的等待对我来说比一个世纪还要漫长，但当那个“历史时刻”最终来临的时候，我们却好似已相识多年。但是，告别的时候，我迟疑了，害羞地给了她一个朋友的拥抱；而她回吻了我，那一吻，幸福得让我觉得天旋地转。

我们中间的那层窗户纸终于被捅破了。从那天起，直到我们10个月后在台湾结婚，我们每天都见面。

第二天晚上，我们参加了非洲毕业生的免费晚宴，但是免费约会不是长久之计啊。迟早我都得自己为心上人花钱。我们第三次约会的时候，我请苏吃饭。那天她穿了一件非常漂亮的晚礼服，还穿了高跟鞋，还以为我会像他的前男友约翰那样请他去一家高级餐厅。约翰是个穿着讲究入时的绅士，给她送花，帮她开车门，带她去高消费的餐厅。和约翰这样的完美绅士相比，我一无是处。

过了几年时时处处强调一致的军队生活之后，我倒喜欢穿的随便一些，像个学生。我留着参差不齐的胡子，穿的也很穷酸。如今，花大价钱把新衣服搞旧已成为时尚。殊不知十年前，我就穿到处是洞的乞丐装了，那是我当兵剩下的衣服。

幸运的是，苏并不介意我的不修边幅。我没有带她去高级餐馆，而是吃了便宜的快餐，，苏也并不在意我是不是很穷。约翰请她吃饭时花的停车费比我请的晚饭还贵。

哦，我可怜的约翰，第二周的周末我在苏的教堂看到了我的这位“前任”。虽然，他已经交了新的女朋友，但是我搭在苏肩头的手臂还是让他妒火中烧。我和他对视，我们的目光像两把剑一样锋利，此时，苏面对约翰热情的拥抱显得非常尴尬。如果目光能杀人，那么教堂的过道上早经是血流成河了

令苏气愤的是，约翰开始频繁的在她公寓逛荡。当苏最终把他赶走的时候，我松了一口气。直到那时，我才意识到我们已经离不开对方。我退缩了。

我当然很清楚苏是我最理想的另一半。这世上还真有生在台湾，长在台湾，热爱中国的美国女孩。而且，竟然还被我遇上了。苏真的是我喜欢的类型，但是我直言不讳地告诉她，我想她无法适应我们到中国后可能要面对的简朴生活。

她却再三的表示，我做什么，她就做什么。

但是我仍不确信。一天晚上，在宿舍停车场，我罗列了一堆我们不能结婚的理由。她静静地听着，睫毛上挂着泪水，我当时恨不得打自己一顿。突然，我不假思索的说：“十二月我们要去台湾，在那儿结婚怎么样？”

时至今日，我也不知道当时脑子里怎么冒出这样一句一点也不浪漫的求婚词，还脱口而出。苏只是笑了笑，“你是开玩笑的，是吧？”

说实话，我自己的吃惊程度也不比她小，但是看到她在笑，我不能也笑啊，所以，我马上说：“不，我是认真的。”

她睁大双眼，“好的，我答应你！”

苏的很多同学都参加了我们1981年12月份在台北基督学院举办的婚礼,但是婚礼的细节我有些记不清了。我当时非常紧张，若不是苏的父亲拿走了我的机票，我可能真会把苏一个人丢在礼堂。这种疑问在婚礼举行很久以后都还没消失，但是几年之后我们终于克服了它，而我们的婚姻也越来越稳定。

如今，太多的婚姻都建立在愚蠢、狂热的激情之上，通通失败了，因为它们缺乏成长，承诺，以及一个有点过时的词——牺牲。这是我妻子最令人敬佩的美德：她勇于牺牲。

坚守着她不论贫穷或富有的结婚誓言，苏从来没有抱怨过我简朴的生活方式。当我的小公司发达之后，六位数的收入让她过上了比嫁给我时预想的好得多的生活，我非常骄傲。但是我的心仍在中国，当我们逐渐实现了所谓的“美国梦”，我更担心了，“苏舍得丢下这一切去中国么？我能么？”

1987年，我踌躇了很久，终于问她，“我们结束这里的生意，搬去中国，你觉得怎么样？”我问的时机不对，苏当时要照顾我们的孩子，而且马上另一个孩子也要出生了。但是，她表现的却很有信心，说：“如果你觉得可以，我们就走。”

第二年，我们破釜沉舟，带上我们两个年幼的儿子移居厦门。这变化让人觉得压力不小，但我们从没有后悔过。在中国的生活也比我原想的要精彩的多。

回首往事，小学五年级到结婚真是一段辛苦的耕耘，但是却是值得的，也收获颇丰！我无法想象，如果没有我这位“台湾制造”的太太，如果不在中国，生活会是什么样子！

包办婚姻真的有些好处，比如说可以省去我们这些保守男人约会之苦。但是究竟是谁包办了我们这段看似不可能的姻缘的呢？这样的婚姻，不是谁能包办的了的，我们是天作之合啊。

是我们对中国共同的兴趣让我们走到了一起，所以，或许可以说，中国是我们的红娘！

谢谢你，中国！

1 See Changting Stories. XMU males used the same strategy—with notebooks!
2 注释1：请看“长汀故事”一章。厦大的男生现在也常用这一招，不过把车换成笔记本而已。
www.amoymagic.com （魅力厦门网站）

Xiamen University's Many Firsts

2009-02-20T06:16:00.000+08:00

潘维廉博士 ... 厦门大学工商管理中心

China's only key university founded by an Overseas Chinese
中国唯一一所由海外华侨创办的重点大学
China's only key university in a Special Economic Zone
中国经济特区中唯一一所重点大学
China's most beautiful campus (only Wuhan University comes close).
中国最美丽的校园（只有武汉大学能媲美）
China's largest university auditorium (overlooking the sea)
中国最大的大学礼堂（眺望大海）
A "Cradle of modern aviation"
"现代航空学的摇篮"
A "Cradle of modern Chinese oceanography" (1st PhD in Oceanography)
"现代中国海洋学的摇篮"（培养了海洋学的第一个博士）
China's 1st to award the MBA degree
中国首次授予MBA学位的大学
China's 1st EMBA to enroll students (4th most popular E-MBA today)
中国第一次招收EMBA学生的大学（目前是第四大热门的EMBA学校）
China's largest number of enrolled EMBA students
中国招收最多EMBA学生的大学
China's leading chemistry department
中国leading的化学系
China's 1st Institute of and degrees in Higher Education Research
中国第一个高等教育研究所和高等教育学位
China's first modern college for foreigners (OEC)
中国为外国学生设立的第一所现代大学
China's pioneer in correspondence education (since 1950s!)
中国函授教育的先锋（从20世纪50年代始）
China's leading mathematicians, including talents like Chen Jingrun.
中国著名的数学家，包括陈景润等天才
China's closest university ties with Taiwan.
中国离台湾最近的大学
China's 1st Taiwan Research Center
中国第一个台湾研究所
China's 1st Taiwan research quarterly)
中国第一份台湾研究刊物
China's 1st institute of S.E. Asian and Overseas Chinese Studies
中国第一个中南亚及海外华侨研究机构

China's 1st Anthropology Museum
中国第一个人类博物馆
One of China's 1st universities to teach International Law
中国最早教授国际法的大学之一
One of China's Leaders in Political Affairs Research
中国主要的政治事件研究点之一
China's only Public Economics Dept. designated as a "National Key Branch of Learning"
被中国公共经济部指定的唯一一个"国家重点研究branch"
One of China's 1st Dept. of Economics and Trade
中国最早的经贸学院之一
China's leading economics college (China's 1st economics journal, in 1959)
中国主要的经济学院（中国第一份经济刊物，1959年）
China's #1 State Key Laboratory in Physical Chemistry of Solid Surfaces
中国固体表面物化国家1号重点实验室
China's only Key Laboratory in Analytical Sciences (the Materials and Life Chemistry)
中国唯一的分析科学重点实验室（数学和生命化学）
Inter-university ties with at least 89 foreign institutes
至少与89个外国学院建立校际联系
And the list goes on...
此列表将继续添加......
www.amoymagic.com

是如何来到这里的或天堂之...

2009-02-20T06:06:00.003+08:00

潘维廉博士 ... 厦门大学（Copyright2006-2009， Bill Brown）
英文"How I Got Here"
中国--我们的红娘
英文"China-Our Matchmaker"

很多人问我为什么在1988年选择来厦大时，他们都期待一个深沉的、意味深长的回答。但我的回答很简单：厦大是中国当时唯一允许外国学生带家属来的学校。一个更有意思的问题是"究竟为什么要来中国？"答案是――上帝的感召！

在我20岁之前，我从来没有想过我会见到一个中国人，也没有想过会吃中国菜。我记得我20岁的时候有人告诉我，世界上四分之一的人口是中国人，我说，"不可能！我们家有四口人，但没有一个是中国人！"但很快我就去了东方，美国空军1976年派我到台湾工作2年。而此后十年发生的一系列事情最后使我来到了厦大。

天上的感召作为一个年轻的美国空军导弹系统专家，我在中国大陆唯一的兴趣就象个军事目标。后来我知道，感谢20世纪70年代之前，台湾和apocalyptic Yellow Peril之间没有打仗，而是对话。

一个明媚的春天早晨，我所在的空军基地上空飘下一团大陆来的传单，就象彩色的雪片。我不懂中文，这些传单一点都没有引起我的注意――直到一个台湾警察告诉我们，"你们要是碰一下这些传单，就会被抓起来！"人们总是对被禁止的东西充满好奇心，我把这些违法宣传单塞进口袋，跑回家，关起窗帘，偷偷地研究起来。我不相信大陆会象照片中拍的那么rosy（应该是红色，而不是rosy），这引起了我的好奇心，于是我就开始阅读中国历史和文化方面的书。

我爱上了台湾岛和岛上的人们，当我知道四分之三的台湾人来自福建的时候，我决定哪天我一定要去大陆看看。我从来没有想过，十年后，我不仅去了福建，还成了福建省的第一个外国永久居民。

听说过厦门吗？1988年4月，就在我的二儿子马太出生后不久，台湾的一个完全陌生的人给我打电话，他说，"我听说你想到中国学中文。你听说过厦门吗？那里的大学可以给学生家属提供宿舍......"

"不，我从没想过要去，"我说，"我妻子刚生孩子，这两年我们哪都不能去。不过还是要谢谢你。"

正好一星期之后，一个加利福尼亚Orange的人给我打电话说，"听说你想到中国学习。听说过厦门吗？"

"听说过，"我说，"就在上星期！"后来我跟他见了面，5个月后，我和妻子带者两个幼子，来到了厦门大学！

只要英语老师！ 1988年，我是管理学博士，来到厦大，6个"China Hands"说中国除了英语老师什么都不要。他们建议我回美国考取一个TESL学位。可以想像，当我听到厦大开始设立中国第一批MBA program，他们也有了一个外国老师时，我又惊又喜。幸运的是（对我来说是幸运的，）那个美国老师由于家里出了点事就回国了。院长问我是否愿意接替他的工作，我说，"让我考虑一下吧。"大约考虑了三十多秒后，我说"好"，从那时起我们就留在厦大。

恰当的时间，恰当的地点，作为这个团队的一分子让我感到很骄傲。两年后我们学院颁发了中国第一个MBA学位（比南开大学早6天）。但在1988年，厦大和厦门远远没有我们今天所见到的这个校园、这座城市漂亮，那么让人愉悦。

一个贫穷的特区厦大是中国经济特区内唯一的一所全国重点大学，但中国还是一个相当贫困的国家，刚从几十年经济困难中恢复过来。厦门大学的生活条件很不尽人意。一周内有好几天要停水停电（有一次连续4天停水，我只好用提桶从山上提水下来）。装上自来水了，可水管里流出的水是褐色的，象茶一样的颜色。空气也不干净，尽是煤灰，我咳得象是个老烟鬼。

街道也很破，以前只有三条汽车干道，汽车很旧。黑色气体穿出汽车的木地板缝，有时下车时我看起来就象是个吟游诗人。

厦大校园的小路大多都很脏，下雨的时候，整个校园就成了一片沼泽，学校大门前车辆在泥里抛了锚，就会阻碍交通。排水系统很差，虽然厦门是一块小岛，校园还是被淹了。一次台风过后，外国事务办公室（现在的ICE）把文件摊开在太阳下的草地上晒干。（我很想知道这些文件里是否有关于我的什么信息，但我不敢偷看一眼。）

如果说外国老师的生活条件很差，那么中国的著名教授和领导的生活条件就更差了。我经常看到我们MBA学院院长刘鹏，身穿长袍，从公共浴室走好长一段路回家。纪玉华，现在是国内知名的"大胡子伯伯"，同许多其他教师住在一个房间里，同他们一样，他在公共走廊上用纸板做成了个厨房（用纸板做的门上......）。

从内部开始改变我们在1988年时从没想象过，仅仅十年后厦大会变成今天这个田园般美丽的校园，也没想过厦门市会成为闻名世界的花园城市，既保证经济增长又能很好地保护环境。
、
2002年，我用了8个月时间考察厦门，厦门参加斯图加特国家花园城市比赛。我所看到的让我很震惊。每个人都可以看到，这个"海上花园"确实是地球上最漂亮的城市之一，外行人不知道实现如此全面变化背后的领导和策划。

跟厦门市一样，厦大的改变不仅仅是表面上的，更是追求和精神的进化――尽管在我写这本书之前丝毫没有感觉到这种变化，我也不知道厦大在过去的85年对中国乃至是对世界的贡献。这本书只只是很粗浅的介绍了一些内容，我希望这些能帮助你理解在一定程度上理解，为什么厦大不仅是南方之强，更是中国之强。

外国"专家"在中国
老师还是学生？
（摘自《中国问题》伯特兰罗素（1922）著）
[谭倩倩翻译]

" 我当初来中国是为了教书的，但在中国停留的时间越久，我就越不知道我能教他们些什么，相反我倒是在想我能向他们学些什么。我发现，长时间在中国生活的人往往都会这么想。但对于那些只在中国生活了较短时间，或者来中国纯粹为了赚钱的人，持这种态度的人少得可怜。这是因为在我们真正重视的东西上中国无法超过我们――军事力量和经济繁荣。但是对于那些崇尚智慧或美感，甚至只是追求更高生活品味的人，他们可以在中国更多的找到他们所真正需要的东西。而这些，是他们在纷乱繁杂的西方社会所很难找到的。他们可以在中国过上幸福的生活，因为这些东西也是中国人所看重和需要的。我多么希望，中国可以给予我们她的宽容、博大、平和，就像我们在科学技术方面所给予中国的。
"我们穷尽一生的时间来积聚我们永远也不会去消费的金钱值得吗？
"中国人对这些问题的答案是否定的，所以他们必须忍受贫穷、疾病和政治混乱。但是，为了弥补这些不幸，他们保留了享乐、安逸和笑容，这是工业国家所没有的。我所认识的中国人，无论他们来自哪个阶层，都比其它任何一个民族更喜欢笑；他们从每一件事情中享受快乐，一个笑话就可以缓解争端......
无论来自上流社会还是最底层的中国人，都有着深刻的自我认知，这种认知是欧洲的教育无法溶蚀的。正是这种强烈的自我认知，使他们不会孤注一掷、独断专行，无论是个人还是整个国家。他们承认，中国的军事力量还不算强大......但他们并不认为能用最短的时间消灭敌人是一个人或一个国家最重要的品质。实际上，我认为，他们觉得中国是世界上最大的国家，有着世界上最先进的文明。"

www.amoymagic.com

A Sign from the Heavens (How I got here)

2009-02-20T05:28:00.005+08:00

Bill Brown ... Xiamen University
Many ask how I ended up in Xiamen and I reply, "A sign from the heavens!" And this is literally true, as I wrote in the intro to the book "Xiamen University--Strength of the South". Also read "China--our Matchmaker" to learn about my blond, blue-eyed made-in-Taiwan wife and our "match made in heaven" (but assembled in China).

How I Got Here (中文）
(A Sign from the Heavens!)
Adapted from "Xiamen University, Strength of the South"

Many Chinese expect some deep, philosophical response when they ask me why I chose XMU in 1988, but my answer is rather prosaic: XMU was the only Chinese university at that time that let foreign students bring families. A far more interesting question is "Why did I come to China at all?" The answer is-I received a sign from the heavens!

After 20 years in China it is hard for me to believe that I never met a Chinese or ate Chinese food until I was twenty years old. I remember being told that one in four people on earth were Chinese and I said, "That's not true. Our family has 4 people and none of us are Chinese!" But I got oriented quickly when the U.S. Air Force sent me to Taiwan for two years in 1976, and that was the beginning of a decade-long chain of events that led me right to XMU.
Sign From the Heavens As a young Air Force missile systems expert, my only interest in the mainland was as a military target. With hindsight, I'm very thankful that by the 1970s Taiwan and the apocalyptic Yellow Peril were exchanging not weapons but words.

On a bright, spring morning, a batch of mainland propaganda leaflets fell from the heavens like colored snow right onto our Air Force base. I could not read the Chinese so they did not interest me in the slightest-until the Taiwanese police told us, "You'll go to jail if you even touch them!" Forbidden fruit is always sweeter, and I stuffed my pockets with contraband propaganda, raced home, closed my curtains, and studied them secretly. I didn't believe the mainland was as rosy as the photos depicted (Red maybe, but not rosy), but they piqued my curiosity, and I began reading about Chinese history and culture.

I had already fallen for Taiwan and her people, and when I learned that 3/4 of Taiwanese were from South Fujian, I decided that someday I'd visit the mainland. I never dreamed that a decade later I'd not only visit but become Fujian Province's first permanent resident foreigner.

Heard of Xiamen? In April, 1988, right after the birth of our second son, Matthew, a total stranger phoned from Thailand and said, "I hear you're interested in studying Chinese in China. Have you ever heard of Xiamen? Their university has dorms for families..."

"No, never have," I said, "and my wife just had a baby so we can't go anywhere for a couple years. But thanks anyway."

Exactly one week later, a man from Orange, California, phoned and said, "I've heard you want to study in China. Have you ever heard of Xiamen?"
"Yes, I have," I said. "Last week!" I met with him, and 5 months later my wife, two infant sons, and I were in Xiamen University.

Only English Teachers! When I showed up at Xiamen University in 1988 with a PhD in management, half a dozen "China Hands" said China wanted nothing but English teachers, and they suggested I return to the U.S. to get a degree in TESL. So imagine my surprise and delight when I heard that XMU was starting one of China's first MBA programs, and that they did have one foreign teacher. And as "luck" would have it (for me, if not for him), the American teacher left China mid-year because of family issues back home. The Dean asked me if I'd take his place, and I said, "Let me think about it." And after thinking about it for a good 30 or 40 seconds, I said yes, and we've been here ever since.

It was the right place, and the right time, and I felt so proud to be part of the team that a couple years later awarded China's first MBA degrees (beating Nankai University by 6 days). But in 1988, neither Xiamen University nor Xiamen City was remotely like the idyllic city and campus we take delight in today.

A Poor SEZ XMU may well have been China's only key university in a Special Economic Zone, but China was still a poor country, recovering from decades of difficulties, and XMU's living conditions left much to be desired.

The electricity and water were shut off several days a week (we were once without water for 4 days and I lugged it up the hillside in buckets). When we did have water, it gurgled from the faucet brown, like tea. The air was dirty as well, full of coal soot, and I coughed like a veteran smoker.

Roads were poor, we had only 3 main bus rouses, and buses were dilapidated. Black exhaust often billowed through the busses' wooden plank floors and sometimes I looked like a minstrel1 by the time I staggered off.

Rains transformed our campus' dirt roads into quagmires, with vehicles mired in the mud at the university gates. Though we're an island the drainage was poor and XMU often flooded. After one typhoon, Foreign Affairs (now ICE) spread their documents on the lawn to dry them in the sun. (I was curious to read what they had on me, but I didn't have the nerve to sneak a peek).

If foreign teachers' living conditions were bad, those of famous Chinese professors and leaders were even worse. I often encountered Liu Peng, our MBA Center's Dean, walking home in a robe from the public bathroom a block away. Ji Yuhua, now the nationally famous Uncle Beard, lived in one room, and like other teachers he had built a kitchen of cardboard in the common hallway (replete with padlock on the cardboard door!).

Changed From Within We would have never imagined in 1988 that only a decade later we'd have the idyllic campus we take for granted today, and that Xiamen City would be a garden city recognized internationally for balancing record economic growth with sound environmental preservation.

In 2002, I spent eight months researching Xiamen to help represent her in an international competition for livable cities in Stuttgart2. I was awed at what I discovered. While anyone with eyes in their head can see that the "Garden City" is indeed one of the most beautiful cities on the planet, the casual observer does not see the tremendous quality of leadership and planning that made such comprehensive changes possible.

`XMU, like Xiamen City, has undergone not a mere cosmetic makeover but an evolution of purpose and spirit-though I did not have an inkling of the sheer scale of change until I researched this book. I also had no idea of XMU's contributions not just to China but to the rest of the world over the past 85 years. This book only scratches the surface, but I hope it will help you understand, in some small measure, why XMU is not only the Strength of the South but the Strength of the Nation as well.

Below is a list of some of Xiamen University's Many "Firsts!"
Some of XMU's Many Firsts

China's only key university founded by an Overseas Chinese
中国唯一一所由海外华侨创办的重点大学
China's only key university in a Special Economic Zone
中国经济特区中唯一一所重点大学
China's most beautiful campus (only Wuhan University comes close).
中国最美丽的校园（只有武汉大学能媲美）
China's largest university auditorium (overlooking the sea)
中国最大的大学礼堂（眺望大海）
A "Cradle of modern aviation"
"现代航空学的摇篮"
A "Cradle of modern Chinese oceanography" (1st PhD in Oceanography)
"现代中国海洋学的摇篮"（培养了海洋学的第一个博士）
China's 1st to award the MBA degree
中国首次授予MBA学位的大学
China's 1st EMBA to enroll students (4th most popular E-MBA today)
中国第一次招收EMBA学生的大学（目前是第四大热门的EMBA学校）
China's largest number of enrolled EMBA students
中国招收最多EMBA学生的大学
China's leading chemistry department
中国leading的化学系
China's 1st Institute of and degrees in Higher Education Research
中国第一个高等教育研究所和高等教育学位
China's first modern college for foreigners (OEC)
中国为外国学生设立的第一所现代大学
China's pioneer in correspondence education (since 1950s!)
中国函授教育的先锋（从20世纪50年代始）
China's leading mathematicians, including talents like Chen Jingrun.
中国著名的数学家，包括陈景润等天才
China's closest university ties with Taiwan.
中国离台湾最近的大学
China's 1st Taiwan Research Center
中国第一个台湾研究所
China's 1st Taiwan research quarterly)
中国第一份台湾研究刊物
China's 1st institute of S.E. Asian and Overseas Chinese Studies
中国第一个中南亚及海外华侨研究机构

China's 1st Anthropology Museum
中国第一个人类博物馆
One of China's 1st universities to teach International Law
中国最早教授国际法的大学之一
One of China's Leaders in Political Affairs Research
中国主要的政治事件研究点之一
China's only Public Economics Dept. designated as a "National Key Branch of Learning"
被中国公共经济部指定的唯一一个"国家重点研究branch"
.........
Click Here to read more of XMU's firsts

And Click Here to read "China, our Matchmaker"
www.amoymagic.com

Insane Amoy Dialect?

2009-02-19T12:56:00.002+08:00

Bill Brown ... Xiamen University
Ann Mackenzie-Grieve's husband came to Xiamen in the 1940s to learn the Amoy Dialect, which some thought would cause insanity! In her book "Race of Green Ginger" she humorously relates:

'I'm sure you'll find Chinese culture is worth studying,' said Mrs. Roots, 'but there don't seem to be any of those useful courses that you find at home about European culture. Why, I studied Dante in a very clear twelve-lesson course when Mr. Roots and I stayed in Italy.'

'You should tell your husband, Mrs. Theobald, to write one for the ladies, instead ofworking all those years on his dictionary.'

Mrs. Danvers leaned across to the bridge table. She made a point of being nice to the missionaries [of the Amoy Misson], she told me later. 'I hardly think that Mr. Theobald could help you there. Chinese culture is a complicated subject, you know. And he's given all his time to the local language and customs.’

‘People say you get peculiar if you study Chinese too long.', Mrs. Jones of the Customs addressed her remark to Mrs. Theobald quite kindly. I concluded that she believed the sanity of missionaries to be somehow immune.

Mrs. Weeks, the doctor's wife, said: 'I knew a man who put snakes in his wife's bed; he was terribly good at Chinese.'
…I should have to risk the snakes. Cyril [her husband] had to learn the language-that was why we were in Kulangsu. Apart from all cultural and social considerations, I, being borne in a sedan chair about the island, unable to make any sound which conveyed the least shred of meaning to the bearers, was even prepared to risk mental derangement. Mackenzie-Grieves, 1959, p. 29,30
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Scottish Medical Secretaries

2009-02-16T15:31:00.004+08:00

Bill Brown ... Xiamen University

Xiamen (Amoy) was pretty much the Scotland of China to many foreigners. At least 4 Scottish authors that I know of said the hills and rocks and rough coast reminded them of their homes. And Scotland accounted for a very disproportionate percentage of the best merchants, bankers and missionaries in China--great men like Robert Burns, and Dr. Patrick Manson, the "Father of Tropical Medicine," who discovered the link between malaria and mosquitoes (and Chinese vampires) right here on Gulangyu Islet. Given Scotland's fame for producing great doctors, I was surprised but happy to receive today this list, entitled Socialized Medicine, with sentences actually typed out by medical secretaries at NHS Greater Glasgow. Laughter's the best medicine, so enjoy and laugh hard enough that you won't end up at Glasgow NHS.

These are sentences actually typed by Medical secretaries in NHS Greater Glasgow.....

1. The patient has no previous history of suicides.

2. Patient has left her white blood cells at another hospital.

3. Patient's medical history has been remarkably insignificant with only a 40 pound weight gain in the past three days.

4. She has no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states she was very hot in bed last night.

5. Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.

6. On the second day the knee was better and on the third day it disappeared.

7. The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be depressed.

8. The patient has been depressed since she began seeing me in 1993.

9. Discharge status: Alive, but without my permission.

10. Healthy appearing decrepit 69-year old male, mentally alert, but forgetful.

11. Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.

12. She is numb from her toes down.

13. While in ER, she was examined, x-rated and sent home.

14. The skin was moist and dry.

15. Occasional, constant infrequent headaches.

16. Patient was alert and unresponsive.

17. Rectal examination revealed a normal size thyroid.

18. She stated that she had been constipated for most of her life until she got a divorce.

19. I saw your patient today, who is still under our care for physical therapy.

20. Both breasts are equal and reactive to light and accommodation.

21 Examination of genitalia reveals that he is circus sized.

22. The lab test indicated abnormal lover function.

23. Skin: somewhat pale, but present.

24. The pelvic exam will be done later on the floor.

25. Large brown stool ambulating in the hall.

26. Patient has two teenage children, but no other abnormalities.

27. When she fainted, her eyes rolled around the room.

28. The patient was in his usual state of good health until his airplane ran out of fuel and crashed.

29. Between you and me, we ought to be able to get this lady pregnant.

30. She slipped on the ice and apparently her legs went in separate directions in early December.

31. Patient was seen in consultation by Dr. Smith, who felt we should sit on the abdomen and I agree.

32. The patient was to have a bowel resection. However, he took a job as a stock broker instead.

33. By the time he was admitted, his rapid heart had stopped, and he was feeling better.

Related Link: Amoy Vampires (True story)
www.amoymagic.com

There IS American Cuisine

2009-01-25T13:43:00.003+08:00

Bill Brown ... Xiamen University
Adapted from "Magic Xiamen--Guide to Xiamen"

°We don't like American food!" Chinese often say, but I just reply, °That's because you've never had it!"

Likening American fast food to authentic American home cooking is like comparing instant noodles with Anxi Hutou's famous rice noodles. Every time I visit Hutou, I return with a 50 pound sack of rice noodles, but I'd sure never drive 4 hours for instant Ramen!

I can sing the praises of the award-winning Hakka dish, He Tian chicken, because I first had it in a real Hakka kitchen in Longyan City's Hetian Village. But my second serving, only 3 hours away in Sanming, was more foul than fowl. Fortunately I know what real Hetian chicken is supposed to taste like.

Some people complain that American food is just a mix of other countries cuisines, but that is its strength! America is as much a melting pot of menus as of men, and in many ways reminds me of a much younger version of the centuries-old culinary traditions of West Fujia's famous little Shaxian Town.

About 1,000 years ago, people from all over China moved to remote Shaxian and brought with them their own unique cooking styles. Over the centuries, extremities of tastes mellowed to maximize their appeal to a cosmopolitan population, and today Shaxian's over 100 dishes are popular all over China (those many so-called Shaxian shops are less than genuine).

As Shaxian has adapted from cuisines all over China, so Americans have adopted and adapted foods from all over the world to create. Those who think all Americans subsist on meat, potatoes and bread need only browse Susan Marie's few dozen cookbooks and their thousands of recipes for genuine American food.

And America, like China, has rich regional specialties. Kentucky Fried Chicken originated in the South, where fried foods are popular. Texans enjoy Tex-Mex, a unique Americanization of Mexican food. (Nothing beats a breakfast burritos!). The French influenced Louisiana's Cajun cooking.

Americans adapted Italian cooking to create a distinctively American style of pizza (fair enough, since Italians stole spaghetti from the Chinese). Even the so-called American staple, potatoes, came from abroad. The Spanish introduced potatoes from Peru to Europe in the 16th century, and they eventually made it back to America, largely via Ireland. Turkey and corn are genuine American foods (from Native Americans).

Americans also have inventive salads, like the Waldorf and Caesar, and endless desserts like chocolate brownies and pumpkin pie. And those who turn up their noses at the very idea of a cheeseburger might change their tune if those noses got a whiff of a real burger: a thick, juicy, hand-shaped (not machine-stamped) beef patty bedded between fresh buns and blanketed with real cheeses, fresh lettuce, tomatoes, pickles, grilled onions, and slathered in a rich sauce or dressing.

Epicureans eschew American cuisine as Old Money shuns New, and it may well be our tastes are immature, untamed¡ªbut just give us a few centuries.

Sample Tex-Mex (one of my favorite cuisines) at Xiamen's Coyote Cafe!

Address: Yuan Dang Lu Gan Long Hua Yuan 58-2

Telephone: 504 - 6623

Chinese Judge and the Pig Whisperer

2008-12-11T11:53:00.002+08:00

Bill Brown ... Xiamen University

A century ago, Xiamen's foreigners were quite impressed with both the imagination and the sense of humor of Chinese judges--as well as their humanity. I enjoyed this excerpt from MacGowan ("Men and Manners of Modern China," 1912, pp. 164-6), in which a Chinese judge appealed to a goddess to solve a crime!

CHINESE JUDGES

The Chinese judge, having nothing to control his decisions excepting his own free will, frequently settles cases after a very free and easy method. He sometimes shows great common-sense and ingenuity in the ruses adopted to elicit the truth in some disputed case. An amusing instance occurred some time ago, when the mandarin showed himself to be a man of humour and one well acquainted with the ins and outs of the Chinese mind. A Chinese went abroad and stayed away for fifteen years, where he accumulated quite a comfortable little sum, with which he determined to return home and spend the rest of his days in comfort. Night had fallen when he reached the entrance of the village where his home was. During all the years he had been away no letter had passed between him and his wife, and no tidings had ever reached him about her or his home. Was she alive? And, if so, would she receive him kindly after the neglect of years? His mind was so agitated about the reception he was likely to receive that he took the bar of gold into which he had converted his savings, and hid it in the ashes of the incense dish in front of the village idol in the public temple, and then with beating heart he made his way to his home. He found his wife alive, and to his delight she received him without any reproaches. She was too happy to have him back again to dream of scolding him. As they sat talking he told her how much money he had made and how it was then in the incense dish in front of the Goddess of Mercy in the village temple. He tried to tell her this in a low voice, but he did not succeed. A Chinese does not seem to know how to whisper. He can shout and bawl and howl, but the art of speaking quietly into another’s ear is a lost one in China. The expression “in a pig’s whisper” would be utterly misunderstood in this land.

At a crack in the wall that separated his house from his neighbour’s was an ear that drank in every word that was uttered by husband and wife. It seemed glued to it. It was fascinated, indeed, by the strange stories that poured into it, and when the tale of the gold bar was related it thrilled with joy, for it seemed as though some fairy had come to reveal a hidden fortune. Next morning, before the dawn of the day, the husband wound his way silently to the temple for his gold bar, but to his horror he found it was gone. He at once accused his neighbor of the theft, but the latter declared that he had not even heard of his return, and , therefore, he could not possibly have known anything about his gold. Finding it useless to discuss the matter, he hurried to the nearest mandarin and laid his complaint before him. This official happened to be a man of humour as well as a very sagacious one. He summoned the accused before him and ordered him to restore the gold. This the man declared he could not do for the simple reason that he had never taken it. The mandarin, who was convinced of his guilt, now determined to adopt a ruse which he believed would be successful. He ordered his policeman to go to the village temple and bring the idol in whose incense dish the gold had been concealed into his presence. When it arrived he asked the goddess who had stolen the gold. Profound silence was the only reply. “Don’t you consider it your duty to tell me who the thief is, seeing that the money was practically entrusted to you care?” asked the mandarin. Still no reply. Upon this the judge became indignant and accused the idol of want of respect to him, and also of neglect in allowing a theft to take place in a temple that was her residence. The mandarin now adjourned the case for a day and in an angry tone threatened the goddess that if she did not confess then he would have her publicly beaten with rods by his policemen.

That same evening the mandarin summoned the accused into his private room, and with a look of mystery on his face and in a voice trembling with emotion he said: “The goddess has confessed that it was you who stole the gold. She is furious with you, for you have made her ‘lose face’ to-day when I threatened before my whole court to have her beaten, and she vows vengeance against you and your whole family. She says she will make your fields barren and send sickness into your home. Yours sons will die, and when you leave the world there will be no one to worship at your tomb, and you will wander a hungry and wretched spirit in the land of the shades. The only way in which you can avert the wrath of the goddess is by an instant confession. If you do this, I will use all my influence to get her to forgive you.” The man was so terrified at the prospect of such awful calamities awaiting him that, trembling and full of awe, he made a clean breast of it and restored the bar of gold to the rightful owner; and, though he was punished by the mandarin for his wrong, he considered he had got off lightly, since he had not to suffer the vengeance of the goddess.

.www.amoymagic.com

The U,S, Consul on Xiamen Law (1893)

2008-12-10T18:45:00.003+08:00

Bill Brown ... Xiamen University
When D.C. Judge Roy Pearson, the fearless crusader against frivolous lawsuits, sued a Chinese laundry for $65.5 million after they lost their pants, the Chinese proprietors probably wished they were back in China where, according to Xiamen's U.S. Consul Mr. Edward Bedloe, Chinese are not a litigious society. At least they weren't in 1893, when Bedloe made his report--but times may be changing.

As Xiamen University's Law Department takes off, we have foreign lawyers crawling out of the woodwork, coming to learn and, scarier yet, to teach... I hope you enjoy this excerpt from Amoy U.S. Consul Bedloe's report in “Reports from the Consuls of the United States, Commerce, Manufactures, Etc., Vol. XLII, May, June, July and August, 1893”...

“To an American newcomer in China the laws respecting debt seem at first to be a labyrinth without a clew. Even a lawyer finds it difficult to determine the principles upon which Chinese jurisprudence is based. When, however, the student applies the touchstone of history and public policy, a system is disclosed which, thought it is at utter variance with any that prevails in countries that follow the common law or that employ a code, possesses great wisdom and practical merit. Time and space forbid a detailed account of the juridical development of China, but a brief synopsis may be of benefit to the reader.

In the first place, all Chinese law is customary law…. The law books (so called) of the country are hardly commentaries. They profess to be statements of what is considered right and proper by the community at large.

In the second place, the Chinese regard litigation as an evil and try to reduce it to a minimum. There are no lawyers, no costs, fees, or allowances. There are no calendars, rules of practice, judgment rolls, nor any of the machinery which makes the attorney so prominent a feature of civilized life. A magistrate hears and determines a case very much as a father does a dispute between to children, or, better still, as an arbitrator does a difficulty between two friendly merchants. In the main, justice is done in the premises and, it must be added, is done more speedily, cheaply, and thoroughly than by the tribunals of our own race.

In the third place, litigation being an evil, public policy has increased to a very large extent the number of obligations which have no legal or binding nature except the honor of the debtor. Many of these “debts of honor” will seem monstrous to the legal mind……

…Professional services at Chinese law have in the main no legal value. In practice a physician keeps a memorandum of his services, but seldom, if ever, sends a bill. When his work is done, the patient usually hands him an amount of money equal to what would have been charged under the American system. For this no receipt is given. The same principle applies to scribes, mediums, priests, and other professionals. As a heck upon non-paying customers shrewd professional men insist upon a note, I O U, or bond before doing any work. The document, no matter what its form, is as binding as ordinary business paper. It may be well to add at this point that a creditor has means of collecting debts which seem ridiculous to the Western mind. He depends upon the profound love of peace and tranquility so characteristic of the Chinese race. When a patron or client shows a disinclination toward payment, he visits the latter’s house, sits upon the threshold, and weeps and harangues until his bill is paid. It seldom requires more than an hour of lamentation to collect any reasonable claim.

In cases of insolvency legal debts and those of honor are almost invariably paid by the debtor if he retrieves his position. In very many cases the obligations of bankrupt have been assumed by his children and even grandchildren. This is a legal duty when the debt is legal in character. When it is a debt of honor, its payment by a second generation is considered an act of high filial piety.

A custom, probably peculiar to china, is that of mutual forgetfulness. Business men who have advanced moneys or sold goods on credit and find it impossible to collect their capital or to obtain payment in full of the amount due them, but who are on friendly terms with their debtors, will, after several years, call upon the latter and agree to “forget everything to date.” This is equivalent to a mutual release under seal and is highly favored by the great magistrates and priests of China. In conclusion, it may be stated that commercial litigation and insolvency are much rarer in China than in Europe or the United States. The number of tribunals, magistrates, and court officers is scarcely one-third, and the amount involved not a tenth, of what is at stake in the courts of Christendom.

Beyond the fear of going to law is the greater fear and disgrace of being a delinquent debtor. A Chinaman who becomes financially embarrassed will sell himself for a plantation coolie, go into exile for twenty years, or even commit suicide. It is part of his religion to pay off all he owes in the last week of the year, in order that he may begin the next one free from care and oblitatoin….

….The matter may be summed up in the remark that the expression “a debt of honor” in China is “a debt of duty,” and that one of their great maxims is “the highest good is the performance of every duty, even the humblest.”

Edward Bedloe, U.S. Consul, “Reports from the Consuls of the United States, Commerce, Manufactures, Etc., Vol. XLII, May, June, July and August, 1893”, U.S. Bureau of Foreign Commerce, Government Printing Office, Washington, 1893. pp. 500-503
www.amoymagic.com

Who Will Run Xiamen's Foreign Consulates?

2008-12-09T16:46:00.004+08:00

Bill Brown ... Xiamen University

Xiamen government seems to be taking the Field of Dreams approach in building its new "consulate district." "If you build it, they will come!" Or so they hope. Personally, I think they should have the consulates on Gulangyu Islet, where they used to be. While 100 years ago Gulangyu was the richest square mile on earth, today the government is struggling to break even, much less break a profit, on the tiny garden islet. Xiamen should abandon its periodic visions of transforming the former international settlement into a Chinese Disneyland and once again use Gulangyu's buildings for worthwhile purposes, such as consulates and schools. Of course, they haven't asked for my opinion...

Regardless of where the consulates are located, I do hope more countries open consuls here. It will be good for Xiamen, and good for the foreign countries as well. But newly arrived Consuls would do well to choose carefully their Chinese staff, lest locals not only dictate where consuls are located but also what goes on inside them as well! As MacGowan noted over a century ago, "weak-willed" foreign consuls can easily end up wrapped around the finger of their Chinese secretary, even as my household sometimes seems under the thumb of our helper of 20 years, the indefatigable Lixi! I hope you enjoy this amusing extract from John MacGowan's 1907 work, "Sidelights on Chinese Life" (1907, pp. 16,17).

Chinese in the Foreign Consulates
Perhaps the most conspicuous instance of the dominating influence of the Chinaman is seen in the foreign Consulates. In each of these there is a Chinese official employed that is called a writer. He is a gentleman and a member of the literary class. His duties are to write dispatches in Chinese to the mandarins and to be the one connecting link between the native authorities and the particular foreign Consul in whose service he happens to be. All petitions or complaints from the Chinese have to go through his hands, so that his position is one of great responsibility and power.

If the Consul happens to be a man of strong, independent character he will hold his own, and the business of the Consulate will be in a large measure under his own control.

If he is, however, easy-going or of average intellectual ability, he comes at once under the hypnotizing influence of the wily self-contained Chinaman, who before long becomes the master spirit in the office. This fact is so far realized by the leading mandarin of the place that he actually subsidizes him to influence the policy of the Consul to be favourable to him. A hostile writer could so easily influence his mind against the former, and cause such strained diplomatic relations, that he would incur the resentment of his superiors and be dismissed from his office.

I have known a case where the whole policy of a Consulate was dictated by the writer, who was a clever, intriguing scamp. All Chinese documents had to pass through his hands, and it depended upon the amount of the bribes received whether any of them got a dispassionate investigation at the hands of the Consul. His reputation became so bad that he was finally asked to resign, but he did so with a very comfortable fortune that enabled him to take a commanding position amongst the leading men in his neighbourhood.

In whatever direction one likes to take the Chinaman, he seems to have an hypnotic power that secures, if not favour, at least attention.
www.amoymagic.com

Melamine in Whiskas Cat food?

2008-11-26T22:48:00.009+08:00

Bill Brown ... Xiamen University

Has anyone else's pets died after eating Whiskas pet food? For a decade we bought Whiskas, and only Whiskas, by the case--until one cat died and another almost died--in 2007, the very time that Whiskas with melamine was discovered outside China.

The company denies that they have had any problems, and I'd like to believe it--yet USA Today and other sources have shown that Whiskas prepared in Thailand had melamine and cyanide from contaminated Chinese grains. So we should believe that Whiskas made in China never had problems, when my cats sickened at the same time as the problems elsewhere? Read what happened to our cats, and decide for yourself.

In 2007, our beloved old cat, whom we had for 12 years in Xiamen, became very ill at the same time as the younger one, with the same symptoms--gagging, coughing, throwing up. We thought it was hairballs and treated them, but it did not help. We then took them to the vet, but the vet did not know the cause. We never suspected food, because we trusted Whiskas, having fed them nothing but Whiskas for years (purchased by the case at Metro).

Finally, hearing of the problems with melamine in cat food, and that a Mars plant in Thailand that manufactured Purina and Whiskas had used Chinese grains that were contaminated with melamine and cynanide (check here for one source), we tried Optima, and the cats recovered some over a few weeks. But Optima, at least here, is very expensive, so we thought, just to be sure, we'd try Whiskas again. After all, we had used only Whiskas every since the cat was very young (we bought it by the case).

When we went back to Whiskas, within a few weeks both cats were again ill. We took them off Whiskas and tried Optima and Friskies, but it was too late for the older cat. It could not recover, and we had it put to sleep. It was skin and bones. The younger cat, over a couple months, recovered, though still is not quite the same.

I e-mailed Whiskas last year and they said they'd had no problem. But given the widespread melamine scares the past year, and that melamine has been found in everything from children's formula to coffee-mate and candy, it seemed to me that, in fact, Whiskas might also have used contaminated Chinese grains in China (as they did elsewhere). I e-mailed Whiskas again. It is too late for our cat, but hopefully other cats will not suffer the same.

A couple days ago, a lady from Whiskas in Beijing phoned, and was very apologetic, but insisted that Whiskas had taken this very seriously, and inspected their products, and had found nothing. Is this likely? If Whiskas used contaminated Chinese grain in Thailand, is it any less likely they'd use it (inadvertantly, of course) in China itself?

Given that we fed our cats nothing but Whiskas, and that both became ill with the same symptoms at the same time, that both recovered when taken off Whiskas, and that both became ill again when back on Whiskas, and that the old one did not recover but the younger one did when back on Optima (and Friskies now), does it not seem likely that Whiskas also was the victim of contaminated grains?

It is too late for my cat, but I hope other pet owners will not suffer the same experiences, and I wish I could believe that the firm in Beijing is being upfront--but it seems very unlikely.

If your pet too has become ill, or died, from Whiskas, let me know (amoybill AT gmail.com).

Bill http://www.amoymagic.com

Below is the info from the link above:
The tainted ingredients in the Asian incident came from a Mars plant in Thailand that manufactured Pedigree dog foods and Whiskas cat food. The culprit in the U.S. poisonings was Chinese grain that had been adulterated with the industrial chemicals melamine and cyanuric acid to make it appear higher in protein. The same contaminants were also found in feed for hogs, chicken and fish that had entered the U.S. food supply.

Mars researchers had linked the incidents even earlier -- in March 2007 -- after scientists figured out that melamine was involved in the U.S. contamination. Mars shared the information with the U.S. Food and Drug Administration, but major veterinary groups including the American Veterinary Medical Association say no one informed them of the link.

The Georgia researchers' findings have worrisome long-term implications for both pets and people:

...[S]ublethal MARF [melamine-associated renal failure] could represent an important, previously unrecognized cause of chronic kidney disease in dogs and cats. Interestingly, the contaminated wheat gluten in the 2007 outbreak was a human food-grade product. The potential effects of ingestion of similarly contaminated material by people are unknown.
Link

www.amoymagic.com

What Teachers Make (Much more than Money!)

2008-11-24T09:20:00.002+08:00

Bill Brown .... Xiamen University

Thanks, Joann Hill (who was born in Hope Hospital right here on Gulangyu Islet) for sending this to me today. I don't usually read, much less forward or post, such things--but this one hit home! :)

WHAT TEACHERS MAKE

The dinner guests were sitting around the table discussing life.

One man, a CEO, decided to explain the problem with education. He argued, 'What's a kid going to learn from someone who decided his best option in life was to become a teacher?'

He reminded the other dinner guests what they say about teachers: 'Those who can, do. Those who can't, teach.'

To stress his point he said to another guest;
'You're a teacher, Bonnie. Be honest. What do you make?'

Bonnie, who had a reputation for honesty and frankness replied, 'You want to know what I make? (She paused for a second, then began...)

'Well, I make kids work harder than they ever thought they could.

I make a C+ feel like the Congressional Medal of Honor.

I make kids sit through 40 minutes of class time when their parents can't make them sit for 5 without an I Pod, Game Cube or movie rental.

You want to know what I make?' (She paused again and looked at each and every person at the table.)

''I make kids wonder.
I make them question.
I make them apologize and mean it.
I make them have respect and take responsibility for their actions.

I teach them to write and then I make them write. Keyboarding isn't everything.

I make them read, read, read.
I make them show all their work in math. They use their God given brain, not the man-made calculator.

I make my students from other countries learn everything they need to know in English while preserving their unique cultural identity.

I make my classroom a place where all my students feel safe.

I make my students stand, placing their hand over their heart to say the Pledge of Allegiance to the Flag, One Nation Under God, because we live in the United States of America.

Finally, I make them understand that if they use the gifts they were given, work hard, and follow their hearts, they can succeed in life.'

(Bonnie paused one last time and then continued.)

'Then, when people try to judge me by what I make, with me knowing money isn't everything, I can hold my head up high and pay no attention
because they are ignorant... You want to know what I make?

I MAKE A DIFFERENCE . What do you make Mr. CEO?'

His jaw dropped, he went silent.

www.amoymagic.com

100 Chinese Surnames; Sorry--Wang Number

2008-11-21T11:44:00.002+08:00

Bill Brown ... Xiamen University

Sorry, Wang Number!
Adapted from "Magic Xiamen--Guide to Xiamen" (within China)
"Magic Xiamen--Guide to Xiamen" (outside China)

Chinese have about 8,000 surnames, with Han Chinese using about 3,050 of them. But roughly 87 percent of Han Chinese share the same 100 or so most common names—hence “the people” is expressed “Old 100 Names” (Lǎobǎixìng, 老百姓). The three most common surnames, Lǐ (李), Wáng (王), and Zhāng (张), are used by about 250 million Chinese—almost the population of the U.S.A.! Over 100 million people are surnamed Zhāng.

Just imagine if all Americans were Lǐ, Zhāng, or Wáng. You could dial the Wáng number 1/3 of the time! Do that to your girlfriend and she might give you the old “Dear Zhang Letter” (unless she gives you some Lǐ way).

Forty percent of Chinese share the 10 most common surnames. Zhang (张), Wáng (王), Lǐ (李), Zhào (赵), Chén (陈), Yáng (杨), Wú (吴), Liú (刘), Huáng (黄) and Zhōu (周). Chinese surnames are passed down through the father, but women keep their family name even after marriage.

In old days, it was a capital crime to speak the Emperor’s name aloud, or even to have the same name as the Emperor—which must have created havoc when the Emperor had the same name as 50 million others. When Liǔ Bāng (刘邦) became emperor during the Hàn Dynasty (汉朝 206 BC to 23 AD), people surnamed "Bāng" faced either a name change or a bang in the head (this was the Chinese Big Bāng Theory). This en masse name changing probably drove census takers out of their senses.

In more recent times, given names reflected parents' desire for their children's happiness—or for their political correctness. During the Great Proletariat Cultural Revolution, children were named “Flourishing China” (Xìngguó, 兴国), or “Build the Army” (Jiànjún, 建军), “Love Country” (?ihuá 爱华), or “National Day” (Guóqìng 国庆). And “Red”, of course, was a major theme of many names. Imagine naming your little one “Face the Red” (Cháohóng 朝红), Forever Red (Yonghong 永红), “Red Soldier” (Hóngbīng 红兵). No wonder so many of that generation saw red.

Nowadays parents are more likely to give names that emphasize economics over politics: Zhìfù (致富) means to get rich.

Generally, women’s names have words relating to beauty, nature, jewelry, etc. Examples: “Beautiful” (Měi 美), “Flower” (Huā 花) or “Graceful” (Tíng 婷 ). Men's names reflect strength or military bearing: “Steel” (Gang1 钢) or “Strong Pine” (Jin4song1 劲松).

In my youth, I too was nicknamed after a pine: knothead.

www.amoymagic.com

Windows 64 Crashes Firefox? How to fix it

2008-11-21T10:44:00.001+08:00

Bill Brown . . Xiamen University

Lots of people are frustrated that after recent updates their Firefox is crashing, shutdown by Windows Data Execution Prevention (DEP). There are many suggestions, but most do not work. Shutting down DEP does not always work. Very frustrating, as Firefox is generally very reliable--and much faster than Internet Explorer, which I was forced to use until I found a solution. (If I was into conspiracy, I'd think Microsoft was deliberately creating updates to sabotage Firefox. Then again.... as Confucius once said, just because I'm paranoid does not mean people are not out to get me).

Also, there is an incompatibility with Bitdefender (the fftoolbar@bitdefender.com ) To date, there is no compatible bitdefender plug-in, and this will cause Firefox to crash.

The solution: download the Firefox 3.1 beta. It works fine. No crashes; just as fast as Firefox 3.0.4 , and it looks like the Firefox 3.1 will be out soon anyway.

Another alternative is to use Google Chrome, which seems to be a great browser, but it has both pros and cons.

Happy surfing.

Dr. Bill

www.amoymagic.com

Paint, Thinner and Vanilla

2008-11-16T09:26:00.002+08:00

Bill Brown ... Xiamen University

When we came to Xiamen in 1988, it took me weeks to learn that nutmeg (ròudòukòu, 肉豆蔻) and cinnamon (ròuguì, 肉桂) were sold only in Chinese medicine stores. Better yet, vanilla (xiāngcǎojīng 香草精) was sold only in paint stores! I asked why, and was told, by many Chinese, that paint, vanilla and thinner should be sold together because they are all chemicals.

Maybe they’re right. Peacock Brand Vanilla smelled like paint thinner, and when I put a match to a spoon of vanilla it exploded. After that I didn’t buy any more vanilla from paint stores. I’d already lost a lot of weight my first few months here and I didn’t need any thinner.
www.amoymagic.com

Long Arm of the ATM (in Xiamen Banks)

2008-11-16T09:18:00.002+08:00

Bill Brown ... Xiamen University

Xiàmén’s first ATM machines, in the mid-90s, were for closed during noon naps (Xiūxi休息). I told an official, “I think Xiamen just wants to look modern and our ATM’s are fake. A little peasant hiding inside hands out money, and he goes home for lunch.”

“Not true!” he protested. “These are real ATMs!”

“I was joking!” I said to the blustering banker, but he wasn’t mollified. Soon afterwards they started keeping ATMs open even at lunch.

I hope I didn’t cost the little guy his job.
www.amoymagic.com

Xiamen's Stairway to Heaven

2008-11-16T09:16:00.001+08:00

Bill Brown ... Xiamen University

Huáliǎn, aka Dōnghǎi (东海), was our first real department store, and also had the first escalator. We had endless fun watching old and young alike trying to gather the courage to ascend the moving stairs.

One day, as a crowd of burly dockworkers were daring each other to jump aboard, 3-year-old Shannon and I squeezed through the crowd and stepped boldly out where no Xiàmén peasant had gone before. As they watched Shannon run and skip up the escalator, one muscled man stamped out his cigarette, rolled up his sleeves, stepped onto the escalator—and fell flat on his face. Shannon laughed, pointed, and said, “Look at the funny man, dad!”

“It’s not polite to point, Shannon,” I said.

“Why not?” Shannon said. “Chinese point at us all the time!”

www.amoymagic.com

Media Notice from U.S. Consulate

2008-11-04T18:45:00.000+08:00

Bill Brown ... Xiamen University

New Website Highlights U.S.-Xiamen Ties

The U.S. Consulate General, Guangzhou, is pleased to announce the launch of a new website, American in Xiamen. The website highlights the current activities of the Consulate in Xiamen and demonstrates the close nature of the ties between America and Xiamen. The website address is:

中文: http://chinese.xiamen.usvpp.gov/

English: http://xiamen.usvpp.gov/

The “Events” section of the website provides pictures and descriptions of the Consulate’s most recent activities in Xiamen, including the Consulate’s meeting with Mayor Liu Cigui and participation in the most recent CIFIT. The “About Us” section of the website links to a welcome message from Consul General Robert Goldberg and to a continuing commentary on America-Xiamen connections by Officer-designee for Xiamen Gary Oba. Other sections contain useful links to information about U.S. visas, study in the U.S., U.S. citizen services, and the U.S. Foreign Commercial Service. The website is designed to serve as a useful beginning point for Xiamen residents who would like official information about the United States of America.

Officer-designee for Xiamen Gary Oba will next be in Xiamen on November 10-11, in Guangzhou on November 12, and in Fuzhou November 13-14. Individuals and media personnel interested in the activities of the Consulate are encouraged to frequently check the new website for the latest updates.

www.amoymagic.com

Coffee on Gulangyu (and hotels and hostels)

2008-11-04T18:35:00.003+08:00

Bill Brown ...
Links: Gulangyu Hotels

John and Jennifer Anderson spent the better part of a month on Gulangyu, researching the work of John's parents in the 1930s (John was born on Gulangyu Islet in Hope Hospital).

Jennifer just sent this e-mail with suggestions for coffee places and accommodations on Gulangyu.

November 3rd, Mountain View, California

Dear Bill,

I'm a bit slow in getting this info to you- but here goes, with some comments that may be useful to others visiting Gulangyu in the near future:

For coffee -when John craved it after lunch- we found

Miss Zhao Cafe and Keepsake - on a corner of Longtou near the Produce Market. It had expensive coffee that was quite good (i.e. close to Italian), and a frowzy atmosphere- a bit like a bordello. The coffee was Y30. But it was a comfortable place to sit and watch the world go by.

Babycat Cafe- on the stretch of Longtou that includes Wonton Sister, but on the other side of the street, was very air-conditioned and rather sterile looking- all white. Their coffee was also Y30, I think- but they served some food too. And they have their own home-made Amoy Pies that are much better than the ones for sale at many stores around.

Judy's Cafe is a winner! It is small and personal, and Judy is interested in her customers. Her coffees are mostly Y22, the same price hot or cold. I had the most superb cold mocha coffee there. We went back several times- for lunch and/or coffee. She would sometimes give us something extra- e.g. some cut up persimmon, or a couple of apples, for free, and also offered to cook us dinner one evening. She doesnt generally serve dinner. Her cafe is at 79 Yongchun Lu, near its intersection with Quanzhou, a short distance up from the Yo-Yo Inn (#66 Quanzhou Lu)

Of course these Western style cafes serve relatively expensive western style lunches. We often ate street food for lunch or had some wonton soup at Wonton Sister. In the evening we went 3 times altogether to a little place at #64 Longtou Lu- I dont know its name but its in the same stretch of Longtou Lu as Babycat's and Wonton Sister and on the same side as Wonton Sister. The big advantage for us there was that there was a menu that was in both English and Chinese (and they didnt hide it or say there was no menu as happened at some of the seafood restaurants). It was quite inexpensive and had a good range of dishes (not much fish- mainly squid- called sleeve-fish on the menu) but a good variety of other dishes. So it was a good option when we were tired of eating (and paying higher prices for) seafood. It is also cleaner looking than many other restaurants around.

The Bay View Inn was inexpensive (when booked ahead on the internet through HostelWorld), but our room was very spare and small (you saw it). We liked the Yo-Yo Inn much better- also bookable using HostelWorld- but much more expensive (~$60 US for a room for two with a double bed versus ~$US20 for the 'same' at Bay View). We tried Naya Hotel (#12 Lujiao Lu) during our second stay- also inexpensive, but had a room with a bad drain smell, that was even more cramped than the room at Bay View, so we decamped after one night and were able to get into the Yo-Yo for the rest of our time on Gulangyu. The Naya did give us most of money back. And we quite liked it for a western style dinner once in a while. We met a Canadian couple who were happy staying there, but I think they had a room on an upper floor.

The Yo-Yo was Y388 per night and very clean in a revamped old house- so it has a nice style to it - the room was large and had lots of good places to put things - a certain amount of feminine decorative touches, which was nice too. Because it was up the hill a little it was quieter most of the time (but not when there was repair work being done on the building next door). They provided a breakfast (at 8:30 am) of rice porridge with some meat floss, and vegetable and pickle, which was quite tasty (but repetitive- nothing like the variety offered at the Sunshine Hotel in Fuzhou of course). I would stay there again- its close enough but not too close to downtown. It's owned by a couple of young women who were very pleasant and sensible.

The Naya had the best internet connection (in our Gulangyu experience) and Yo-Yo the worst- but Yo-Yo has a pleasant balcony on each floor and a nice front porch where the connection was better.

Philip Wang was horrified that we were paying so much for accommodation and showed us a couple of other places- further up the hill, and cheaper- also very nice and clean- but a little too far away from 'the action'. But we decided not to move yet again. They are:
1) Silly Girl Coffee my home hotel at 1-1 Jishan Lu (not that much further up the hill than the Yo-Yo). It had rooms that were quite comparable to those at the Yo-Yo, for Y360. And its in its own garden which is pleasant. (www.xilinge-hotel.cn) We had had coffee there one day and lunch another- the noodle soup was good and reasonably priced.
2) Piano and Sea Manor, right beside Ji Shan itself (www.piasea.com). It seems that all of its double rooms have twin beds and cost Y230, and on the top floor there was a suite with two such rooms and a central sitting room complete with piano for Y400 per night- it also had a bathroom off the rooftop balcony, plus an open to the sky bath-tub!

I havent checked the websites myself- they are just from the cards we were given when we visited these two places with Philip.

All the best

www.amoymagic.com

Learning Hokkien in Old Xiamen

2008-10-28T11:10:00.012+08:00

Bill Brown ... Xiamen University
Excerpts from Carstairs' Amoy Dictionary
Click here for "Why Xiamen was called Amoy"

When Xiamen folk ask, "How did you learn Chinese?" I respond, "I picked it up off the streets over the years--and have been trying to put it back..." This usually gets blank stares, so I add, in typical Chinese self-deprecating fashion, "My Chinese is not really that good. And after 20 years even a parrot could pick it up!"

That sometimes gets a bit of a laugh--but I doubt even a parrot could learn Amoy.

I can envision a bright parrot picking up Mandarin, but not the nasal eight-toned Amoy Dialect (also called Minnan Dialect, Hokkien, Taiwan Dialect, etc.). In fact, the mere attempt can lead to insanity--at least according to Desmond Neill, a British army officer serving in Malay and the British Ministry of Labour in Singapore. He was sent to Kulangsu in the late 1940s to learn Hokkien.

Below are excerpts from Neill's absolutely delightful account of studying Hokkien in Amoy, ("Elegant Flower - First Steps in China", John Murray, London, 1956).

[pp. 7,8] Early May 1948 and the day for departure to Amoy had arrived. My ship, evidently not important enough to command a berth alongside the harbor, was anchored somewhere in the Roads behind an imposing array of other steamers, billowing clouds of black smoke in preparation for their sailing. Near Clifford Pier lay a disorderly armada of small sampans, which bobbed up and down on the languid waves like discarded coconut shells, manned by Chinese who scrutinized each new arrival with an eagle’s eye for a fare.

‘Where are you off to?’ shouted one in Malay.

‘To Amoy,’ I replied in my best Hokkien. The man looked blank. He did not understand. Those six months had been wasted.

Filled with a desire to apply my newly acquired knowledge, I made another attempt, concentrating desperately on the right pronunciation. The boatman’s leathery face wreathed with a smile as a new understanding slowly dawned on him. In a flash, all the other Chinese on the pier within hearing distance had gathered around. With grinning enquiring faces they fired question … I became tongue-tied. They chuckled in amusement at my silence. I wanted terribly to explain, tell them I was going to the land of their forefathers.
‘To Amoy,’ I explained.
‘Eee! Aiyaah!’
‘To learn Hokkien….’
‘A Red-Haired speaking Hokkien lah!’ guffawed two or three in a full-throated chorus…’

[On disembarking in Amoy]… ‘Here’s how!’ bellowed the Captain. ‘Come and see us when we return and don’t go round the bend trying to learn this outlandish language.’

...There are seven distinct tones in Hokkien and several hundred monosyllabic noises which go, singly or in combination, to make up the spoken language, with nasal and aspirate variations. The nasal twang would come through with commendable mellifluousness for someone slightly adenoidal or with a cold in the head. …Correctness of tone pronunciation and tone changes was of prime importance for there was only a slight different in modulation, for instance, between returning to China and pawning a pair of long trousers.

…the first few days rolled into weeks of heartbreaking despair as I struggled with Mr. Lim and with the tones, noises and sounds that seemed to make up no pattern, no harmony, and had little meaning for anyone. Simple sentences were understood by shopkeepers or boatmen, but in the middle of lengthier explanations and conversations, a word would slip the memory or a tone mispronounced and in my sympathetic auditor would break out into a hurried and incomprehensible suggestion of what I was perhaps endeavouring to say. At last, however, the jumbled pieces began to fit slowly together. It was like hearing an orchestral concert, prefaced first by the screeching of violins and cellos being tuned up to the right key, with Mr. Lim as the unruffled conductor. But never did an orchestra take so long to tune up.

LEARNING CHARACTERS LEADS TO INSANITY [p. 36]
The memorizing of characters was a strain largely on the retentiveness of memory, helped by a little ingenuity in writing every character out on a blank visiting card….To help memorize a character one was tempted to draw it out on the hand on in thin air with a finger. It was on these occasions that outside observers immediately diagnosed that incipient insanity which is prognosticated for anyone learning Chinese.

...Litigation for instance is made up of two dogs fighting with words [Yu4] , and I have often wondered if the traditional Chinese aversion to the formality of the law courts did not give rise to the idea of litigation in this way. Peace is signified with a woman under a roof, and discord with two women under it.
www.amoymagic.com

Note: Márquez’s Gramática española-china del dialecto de Amoy is considered one of the oldest manuals on a local dialect!

United States Consulate in Xiamen China ?

2008-10-24T22:30:00.006+08:00

Bill Brown ... Xiamen University

Yesterday, at the Xiamen Millennium Harbourview Hotel, I was delighted to meet Mr. Gary Oba, who is from the U.S. Consulate in Guangzhou, and assigned to Fujian Province and Xiamen. And if things work out, we may finally have another U.S. Consulate in Xiamen in a couple years! During his visit last year, U.S. Ambassador Randt mentioned the U.S. would like a consulate here, but it did not seem likely. But this visit, Mr. Oba said, "Xiamen is next on the list." Of course, there are political and financial issues to work out. China has not yet agreed to it, and Washington has not funded it yet--but if the U.S. gets another consulate in China, it will be here.

That will be a great boon to Xiamen, but also to the U.S.. Here are a few reasons that I think we again need a consulate in Xiamen:

!. The U.S. has a long history of cooperation with Xiamen--from the 1840s to the 1940s.
2. Xiamen and Fujian people have for centuries been recognized as being very open to outsiders (Chinese and foreign) and cooperative, and Xiamen people have an especially good attitude about the U.S. because the U.S. helped China in many areas. It was the U.S. that early on tried to put a halt to the coolie trade, and the U.S. was one of the first Western powers to stop trading in Opium. (When they did that, the Chinese Viceroy said, "This is the first time I've seen a "Christian" country in the West practice what it preached!").
3. The U.S., through missionaries, businessmen and diplomats in the Xiamen U.S. Consulate, helped support and pioneer modern Chinese medicine, education, arts, sports, etc.
4. The U.S. helped China fight the Japanese during the war. We had an air base in Longyan, and when U.S. pilots were shot down near Xiamen, in Tong'an, locals rescued the pilots and hid them from the Japanese.
So the U.S. and Xiamen and Fujian have a history together. But today...
5. Fujian has great potential as Beijing pours on the rhetoric and pours in the funds to promote the province as the West bank of the Taiwan Straits development Zone.
6. Fujian is ideally located for trade, between Hong Kong and Shanghai and facing Taiwan.
7. As mainland and Taiwan ties improve, Xiamen will be increasingly strategic.
8. Most overseas Chinese are from southern Fujian province, many from Xiamen. As it becomes more difficult to do business in other areas of China (because of the currency, and increased cost of Chinese labor), many of the overseas Chinese will move their factories from Guangdong and Shanghai to Fujian--because this is their ancestral home, they can get better terms here, and even if they can't, they often own the land in Fujian, and are more willing to take lower profits "at home" than they would in other areas of China.
9. Xiamen is a rich source of educated labor. Xiamen University is China's only key university in a special economic zone, and Jimei College Town is projected, within a few years, to have 200,000 students and faculties in its various colleges and universities.
10. Xiamen is a delightful place to live and work, so U.S. consul officials, I'm quite sure, would enjoy being here, even without the above 9 advantages.

Okay, I could go on, of course. For example, I could talk about the amazing entrepreneurial bent of Fujian people, and how the maritime Silk Route started from here (Quanzhou, just to the North--the legendary port visited by Sinbad), etc.... But my point is--it would be very strategic for the United States to have a consulate in Xiamen--and it would be of great benefit to the Chinese as well, as they try promote their "business abroad" policies.

If only they could open the new U.S. consualte on Gulangyu Islet, in the original red brick building!

www.amoymagic.com

Ahoy from Amoy (Common Talk Highlights)

2008-10-20T18:14:00.003+08:00

by Bill Brown
Xiamen University

Ahoy from Amoy!

A summary of news from this Week's Common Talk (Xiamen Daily's weekly English supplement, which is the first of its kind, and has gone international):

Cover story: "Gulangyu graced with poetry!"

"The third session of the Gulangyu Poem Festival kicked off on Gulangyu last Saturday, where over 80 renowned poets across the country met and shared their poetry and literary beliefs."

Renowned poets? Why wasn't I invited? I'm a poet, and I know it (though I blow it when I show it). Seriously, can you not read my epic poem about the true story of Amoy Vampires and not be moved? Or, at the least, want to move--far away, perhaps?

And "sharing literary beliefs?" I can imagine how that went.

"Yes, I'm professor Hong, and I'm honored to be here and share why I believe in the noun and the verb but eschew the adverb."

Or perhaps Doctor Dong waxed eloquent upon why verbs move him? Or Miss Tang shared how adjectives made her feel? Or....

Now I know why I was not invited to the Gulangyu Poem Festival.

America's Milk Scandal! So you thought it was just China? Common Talk reprinted an article from the New York Times that revealed American milk producers were killing up to 8,000 babies every year, for decades, with milk that contained swill milk, plaster of paris and starch and eggs, etc. Of course, this was 150 years ago. But it took decades to stop it. So the upshot was that what is happeing in China is bad but it's what happens in any rapidly developing country when the government cannot keep up. Of course, the government had a hard time keeping up with the biggest culprits because it had exempted them from inspections.

I appreciated the quote from a leading Chinese dairy's Vice manager last week. "We've learned an important lesson from this. We must provide the public quality, safe, and healthy foods." As if he did not know that before?

But today, Sue and I threw out our remaining bags of Nestle milk powder. It appears Nestle milk powder has malamine in it. An article quoted Nestle in Hong Kong as saying they've no idea how the melamine got in there but it's only a little bit so its okay.

How could even a little bit of a chemical used for plastics end up in milk?

By the way, I was with Alan Smith, of the Livcom Awards, in Shanghai a couple weeks ago, touring a brand new housing development. Alan asked why the new swimming pool was empty and I said it was because they founbd melamine in the water. The officials said, "That's not true!"

No sense of humor.

Xiamen Wal-mart, by the way has been having big sales on milk powder--piles of the stuff, and people with loudspeakers urging people to buy it. Trust-mart is doing the same thing. TV Commercials show smiling Chinese officials with milk moustaches holding glasses of milk.

Still, I'm switching to soy milk. Though who knows what is in soy milk. About a decade ago, Xiamen Daily announced that Xiamen's tofu makers had been filling out their tofu with plaster that they had obtained from recycled plaster casts bought from Xiamen hospitals.

Not sure why everyone complained. With global warming, aren't we supposed to be recycling?

Xiamen University invents Anti-Cancer Drug -- a surefire cure for cancer! It's a "compound that can turn a cancer cell-protecting protein in the human body into a cancer cell killer."

Hey, I think Sichuan cuisine can kill cancer as well--at least any cancer in the tract that leads from mouth to posterior.

I remember about 15 years ago China Daily had a spate of articles about how Chinese medicine had been proven to cure cancer. They also said it had cured AIDS. Those articles went on for months and then nothing more was said about these miraculous cures. Fortunately, given what I know of Xiamen University's Life Sciences department and bio-chemical research, I think XMU's claim to having developed a cancer cure may have more substance to it.

School Principals Swapped! Common Talk said 15 primary and secondary schools in Beijing have come to Xiamen to study local educational practices because Xiamen is a "leader in China in primary education, especially in curricular reform, quality of instructions and extracurricular activities." I guess in Xiamen good primary education is just elementary. Especially if it is at Xiamen International School! This is a free plug for them, by the way).

Quanzhou will host cultural exchanges with Taiwan, including Gaojia opera, Hui'an hand puppets, and Quanzhou marionettes, or "Quanzhou string puppets," as they put it. I'm sure there are strings attached to the exchange program as well.

Common Talk also announced the results of the 2008 Ig Nobel prizes, held on October 2nd at Harvard University, to recognize scientific experiments that "cannot or should not be reproduced." The winners included research in France proving dog fleas jump higher than cat fleas, Swiss scientists got the peace price for recognizing the legal principle that plants have dignity. The cognitive prize went to the Japanese who proved that slime molds can find their way out of a maze (this should encourage some of the low life that lives in our back alleys here). The chemistry prize went to two researchers who tested Coca-cola as a spermicide (one wonders how they tested it, and if they shook it up first). Two archaeologists measured how much an armadillo can mess up a dig. Etc.

Further news: NASA's Rhessi spacecraft has put a different spin on our understanding of the sun with the bright revelation that the sun is not perfectly round. During years of high solar activity it bulges at the middle. (I do the same thing).

The Quanzhou International Club just sent this announcement"

The 6th China National Peasant's Games will be held in Quanzhou starting on Sunday, 26th October 2008 and end on Saturday, 1st November 2008.
This Gala National Event would be akin to China¡¯s own Olympic Sports held every four years but certain events would be held with a difference. Some events would have a peasant and/or agricultural twist such as water-carrying race; seedling-throwing and 60-metre seedling-transplanting competition
We are attaching the games event schedule together with the venue of each sport. Note that the games will be held not only in Quanzhou City but also in JinJiang; Nan¡¯an; Hui An; Chong Wu; Shishi.
Unfortunately, attendance for the OPENING and CLOSING CEREMONIES are by Invitation Only. We asked if tickets for these two events may be purchased but we are told tickets are distributed to businesses, sponsors and local government. So if you have some connections with these, go for it!!

All other events are OPEN and FREE to the Public. We are trying to get confirmation this is indeed the case also for the finals in Basketball; Track & Field; Wushu and Dragon & Lion Dance. We will let you know if we can get confirmation from the organizers.
Please find in attachment a calendar of the games, a brief introduction of the 6th and the 5th China National Peasant¡¯s Games, a reference map showing locations of the downtown venues, and a picture of mascot Tongtong and logo of the games.

www.amoymagic.com

Art of Chinese Mini-Bussing

2008-10-08T21:54:00.003+08:00

The Arcane Art of Mini-Bussing

Adapted from Amoy Magic -- Guide to Xiamen and Fujian

Our first long distance bus trip, to neighboring Zhangzhou and back, was supposed to take 1½ to 2 hours, but that obviously didn’t include the hour they spent packing us on the mini-bus. If only we could have figured out which bus was leaving first.

One would think the fullest bus would pull out first, but not so. Sometimes a half empty bus will race off, the strategy being to pick up more victims down the highway, while a bus that is packed to the gills like a sardine tin might wait another half hour to find some soul willing to fry their fanny on the blistering engine cover. On a 30 seat bus, they can cram 50 victims, who sit on laps, or stand, or squat on tiny bamboo stools in the aisles.

The ticket hawkers all squawk in unison, “Hurry up! We’re leaving right now!” And drivers inch forward a few feet to prove time is of the essence. “Aiyah!” they scream. “Kuai Lai!”

I asked one lady, “Do you have A/C?”

“Of course! See the sign? Get on quick! We’re leaving!”
Sue and I scrambled aboard and squeezed into a tiny seat in the back, between two farmers and their baskets of carrots, cabbage and Chinese celery. The ticket seller snatched my money and the driver switched off the engine.

“I thought you were leaving right now?”

“As soon as the bus is full,” she said.

“It’s packed now,” I argued. But she ignored me like yesterday’s news, and stuck her head out the window like a turtle straining from its shell for a feeble-minded fly, and she screamed at all and sundry, “Hurry up! Get on board. We’re leaving now!”

Several passengers snickered, and I knew I had been had.

A youth who was obviously wiser than I eyed the bus suspiciously and said, “You’ve not filled up the aisle yet.”

The ticket lady rolled her eyes. “Of course we haven’t. We’ll pick up more people down the road. The driver started his engine and inched forward. The youth puffed his chest and led his girl onto the bus, sat on a bamboo stool in the aisle, forked over his 20 Yuan, and the driver switched the ignition off.

“Hey, you said we’re leaving now!” But the agent was again deaf, dumb and blind. I could barely keep from joining the snickers.

Twain’s Duke and Dauphin would have been proud.

Fully 45 minutes after we had been told, “Hurry, we’re leaving!” the van lurched off down the road. I asked the ticket lady, “Why haven’t you turned on the air conditioning?”

“Open windows are cool enough when we’re moving.”

“But you said the bus has A/C!”

“It does!” she said, “But we don’t use it when we’re moving.”

Snicker, snicker, all around me.

The bus slowed every few minutes as the ticket hawker poked her head from her yellow shell and screamed, “Get on board. Plenty of seats! Hurry!” One wily peasant dubiously eyed the collage of faces peering dolefully from the windows like nonAryans on the cattle car to Auschwitz. He timorously put one foot, clad in Playboy socks and plastic flip flops, onto the rusted bus step. The lady grabbed him by the collar, yanked him inside, slammed the door, and said, “Ten Yuan!”

“You said there was plenty of room!”

“There is room,” she said, and pointed to the battery box, which was coated in greenish gray cottony corrosion and grease, and squeezed between the hot engine cover and the wheel well.

Those of us with enough room to expand our rib cages snickered softly.
There was no order to her people packing, so every time the bus stopped to disgorge a victim, we reshuffled the deck of dog-eared bodies; parents lost children, husbands lost wives; one lost a wallet. But we made it to Zhangzhou in one piece, more or less.

After a pleasant afternoon in Zhangzhou, we returned to the bus stop, where we saw a bus inching forward. The sweetest little granny shouted, “Hurry, we’re leaving.”

“Susan, this old granny can’t be like the rogue on the last bus. They really are leaving.” We boarded the bus, paid our pesos, and the driver cut the engine. We sweltered for 20 minutes until sweet old granny had packed her bus.

Susan snickered.
When we reached home that night we discovered that we had been gallivanting about the countryside on Friday the 13th.

Someday I’ll write about China's Saturday the 14th....

Bill Brown
Xiamen University
www.amoymagic.com

Froggy Food in China

2008-10-06T21:13:00.003+08:00

When I phoned the well-known Professor, Ji Yuhua, a few days ago, he said, "Ha! Good timing! I was just rereading your article in "Magic Xiamen" about frog pee and frog spit!" ...

"Never try to catch two frogs with one hand." Chinese Proverb

Froggy Food A Chinese friend removed from his kitchen cabinet a plastic baggie of about four ounces of a grayish, stringy dried matter, rather like a finely shredded sponge. “Only 210 RMB,” he said, beaming delightedly. “My brother brought it straight from the mountains!”

This expensive gray stuff was a rare Chinese medicine and cooking ingredient, second in efficacy only to bird’s nests (made from dry swallow spit). It was dry frog spit. Not just any frog spit, mind. It was that of a rare mountain frog, and collected only during a very brief season in the spring.

It seemed that everyone had frogs on the brain. A few days later our Xiamen University MBA Center invited me to lunch with a group of Provincial leaders who were taking my night courses. They complimented me on my lectures, though one confessed he wasn’t sure if I was contributing to China’s modernization or sabotaging it. Halfway through the meal, the waitress set in front of me a shot glass full of a bright, evil looking ruby liquid. It was redder than the inside lining of Dracula’s cape, and shimmered with a life of its own. I suspected it wasn’t V-8 Juice.
“What is this?” I asked.
“Oh, that’s the blood of a rare mountain frog. It is second in potency only to the blood of …”
“No thanks, I’ll pass.”
“But Professor Pan, you’re the guest of honor!”
“I have no honor. You drink it!”
Eventually the rankest person present took the small cup in both hands, ceremonially offered it to each diner, then downed it in one gulp and smacked his lips.
The waitress then handed me a cup of pale yellow liquid. “What’s this?” I demanded. “Frog pee? Second only to—”
“—Of course not,” she said in disgust. “It’s beer.”
Frog blood, beer, cobra venom (I’ve had it).
I wish they’d stick to tea…

Bill Brown

Xiamen University

www.amoymagic.com

Millennium Harbourview Hotel Xiamen (Xiamen's Best Hotel)

2008-09-18T10:20:00.005+08:00

Xiamen has hundreds of quality hotels but the best is Xiamen's oldest international hotel--the Millennium Harbourview Hotel Xiamen. Here's why.

#1 Service. Many of the top managers have served here since it's opening 15 years ago. These experienced leaders in the hotel industry are committed to providing the best experience possible for their clients. To do this, they offer unsurpassed training (even a newly hired dishwasher, in his 50s, told me he received several weeks training about the hotel!). At Millennium Harbourview, if you need it, they have it--or will find a way to provide it.

#1 Location. A couple weeks ago an American government delegation visited the 2008 China International Fair for Investment and Trade (CIFIT), and stayed at the Sheraton. The Sheraton is nice, to be sure--but the location...? The Americans complained, "Nothing to do out there!" So the last day they moved to the Millennium Harbourview, and were delighted by its downtown location--only a 5 minute walk to Zhongshan Rd. (our Main Street, and a great area to stroll or shop), and only a ten minute walk to the Gulangyu Ferry.

#1 Exquisite Chinese and International Cuisine! The Millennium Harbourview Xiamen has several of Xiamen's top restaurants--the best Western buffet in town (can't beat their breakfast), the incomparable Portofino (Italian), the Japanese Sakura, the Chinese Loong Yuen (excellent Cantonese, vegetarian, etc.). You'll also enjoy watching their Wizard of Pasta rolling in the dough!

Visit our Millennium Harvourview Xiamen page for more details--and then visit our family favorite hotel for a night, or a week--or settle down!

Reservations: 0086-592-2023333-6233/6668
Front Desk: 0086-592-2023333 FAX: 2036666
Add: 12-8 Zhēnhǎi Lù 镇海路12-8号
Email: bc@millenniumxiamen.com
Official Website: http://millenniumxiamen.com/en/index.asp

Enjoy Amoy!

Why Chinese Dogs are Shy

2008-09-18T08:48:00.004+08:00

Every time Sue and I took our early morning walks around the little town of Reedley, California, dogs fences barked and howled and frothed at the mouth, pawing at the wood or chain link fences, ready to attack; one little poor excuse of a dog did chase us down, nipping at Sue's heels--even as the owner watched and smiled.

But dogs aren't so vicious here in China--at least in Xiamen. Some bark and howl, but it lacks the vicious undertone--perhaps because Chinese dogs know their place. Unlike arrogant, American dogs, Chinese dogs know they could just as easily end up in the kitchen as in the SPCA (Click Here for Canine Cuisine).

In America we say it is "raining cats and dogs," but not in China, because dogs would hit the woks long before they hit the ground. A Hakka man told me that during the war with Japan, Chinese soldiers so craved their potatoes 'n puppies that they'd sell their sleeping bags or tent for a feast of canine cuisine. (Probably sold their pup tents).

Chinese often ask why I came to China and I often reply, "Because Chinese food is too expensive in America." And I do delight in having, daily, great Chinese food that doesn't cost and arm and a leg (though the Taiwan headhunters 100 years ago might have charged that). And I've eaten almost everything imaginable, it seems, including Xiamen people's favorite--jellyfish and seaworms. Chinese eat anything edible, and if it isn't edible, they ingest in anyway and call it medicine. But I've never eaten dog, and never will. My sons Shannon and Matt have. They've even ordered it (poor guys have been here too long). But I draw the line at dogs--and cats too.

But let it be known back in Reedley, California, that the next time my wife and I go for a walk, I'm taking a wok and cleaver with me. There's a first time for everything, and pit bull might be just fine as barbeque pit bull.

Enjoy Amoy!
Dr. Bill www.amoymagic.com

These are the Magi--Gift-Giving in China

2008-09-14T09:40:00.004+08:00

Adapted from "Magic Xiamen--Guide to Xiamen & Fujian"

He who gives when he is asked has waited too long. Chinese Proverb

The Art of Chinese Gift-giving It is written that the wise men who brought gifts to the Christ child came from the East. I suspect they meant China, because 1) you can't get any further East than China, and 2) Chinese have raised giving to an art form.

Our first Christmas in China, our elderly dean gave our two sons a toy electric car that set him back at least a week's wages. Two months later, on Chinese New Year, a teacher gave each of our sons a Hongbao (Red Envelope) stuffed with 100 rmb-a small fortune by that teacher's standards. Any doubts on the importance of gifts in China vanished when I read Lesson 38 in, "Modern Chinese Beginner's Course." The correct response to an impromptu invitation to a Chinese friend's home was, "But we haven't brought any gift.

Gift giving rituals vary around China. Tibetans give a white silk scarf, while Hainan Islanders place a lei of flowers over guests' shoulders. In Xiamen, the most common gifts are bags of fruit or packages of our local Oolong tea.

Xiamen folk avoid giving odd numbers of gifts. It must be two bottles of Chenggang medicinal wine, not one or three bottles, or 4 boxes of Tiekuanyin tea, never three or five. The gifts must be proffered respectfully with two hands, and accepted with two hands.

Americans have no qualms in giving an inexpensive gift or card to convey a sentiment because it's the thought that counts. But not in China, where face is everything, and a small or trifling gift may be worse than no gift at all. Conversely and perversely, the larger the gift, the more face for both parties. Over the years, our face has been lifted more times than Elizabeth Taylor's.

Guests have materialized on our threadbare astroturf welcome mat with 50 bananas, or 30 pounds of roasted Longyan peanuts, or 15 pounds of freshly caught fish, or 4 dozen freshly fried home-made spring rolls. We've protested, futilely, that 50 pounds of bananas will rot before we can finish them off. In the end, we either go on banana binges or make a quick pilgrimage to a Chinese colleague's home with a second-hand gift of bananas, tea, dried mushrooms or fresh fish. They probably pass them off too, but somewhere down the line some soul has to get 50 pounds of bananas down the hatch.

Where's the Beef? We had some knotty experiences until we learned the ropes of Chinese gift giving. Shortly after we moved into Chinese professor's housing, Susan baked chocolate cake, which at that time few Xiamen folk had tried. She gave our neighbor a couple of slices to sample, and the astonished granny thanked her profusely and shut her door slowly, politely. Next morning, bright and early, she rapped on our door, and thrust a plate full of beef in Sue's face. She said, "For you," and beat a hasty retreat, ignoring Susan's protests.

"This is terrible, Bill," Sue said. "She should not have done that."

"This is great, Sue." I retorted. "Two pounds of beef costs a lot more than two slices of cake. Think how much we'll save on meat if we give cake to all our neighbors."

Now I know why Marie Antoinette gave everyone cake.

It is Cheaper to Give Than to Receive Nowadays, we are more careful (though not paranoid!) with gift-giving, because it can be costly for all concerned. Those whom we give gifts feel compelled to reciprocate, whether they can afford it or not. As for receiving gifts… they sometimes have more strings than ribbons. But all things considered, I still think Chinese are the Magi-particularly where family and homeland are concerned.

Giving to the Motherland When overseas Chinese labored in abject poverty in the mines and fields of Africa and Colonial Asia, or to build American railroads, they invariably sent a large portion of their meager earnings home to family. It was these pittances, multiplied a million fold, that kept China afloat when we were bleeding her dry through the opium trade. Some laborers became industrial magnates, like Tan Kak Kee, and donated millions to China. Even today, regardless of political persuasions, overseas Chinese continue to remit millions annually not only to their mainland relatives but to local governments to build schools, colleges, orphanages, and roads.

Chinese, rich and poor alike, are a generous people. A lowly mason who lives in a shack nearby gave me 5 pounds of freshly netted fish because he heard my in-laws were visiting from America. A disabled, retired campus laborer shows up occasionally with fresh greens from his garden, or new flowers for our yard. When word got around that I wanted a stone mill to grind wheat, several peasants headed to the rural stone quarries, and we were blessed with not one mill but three (never again will I take wheat for granite).

The mason, the disabled laborer, the peasants, sought nothing in return. They gave because we were friends-like the poor bicycle repairman who repeatedly insists, "It's a small thing. Pay me when you have a real problem to fix." The man's entire world is but a tiny, dusty shop only 8 feet wide and 4 feet deep. Greased bike chains and sprockets, rims and tires and tubes, bike seats and pedals hang from nails on the walls. His furniture consists of two bamboo stools, one for himself and one for customers, and a bamboo footstool that doubles as a table for his cheap tea set, which he sets up every time I stop by. He has spent more serving me tea than he will ever make from fixing my battered bicycle.

Chinese have always given sacrificially to family and their immediate community, but charity beyond that was rare, for it was seen as depriving family and local community of scarce resources. But times are better now, and Beijing is seeking to widen the scope of giving.

Half a dozen programs encourage wealthier urbanites to help their less fortunate and far more numerous comrades in the countryside. Every year, "Project Hope" (????) allows millions of urban Chinese to help fund poor rural children's education. And "Helping Hand" pairs up city kids and country kids, who write to each other and exchange gifts.

Get involved!
Many foreign firms and individuals have participated in campaigns like Project Hope. For details on how to get involved, contact your Chinese colleagues or the municipal government. You can even arrange with local governments to help sponsor schools or poorer students. Opportunities are limited only by your imagination and your purse.

Gold Rats and Oxen A Ming Dynasty Tale (1368-1644) On his birthday, an official's subordinates chipped in to give him a life-sized solid gold rat, since he was born in the year of the rat (each year of a twelve year cycle has a different animal). The official thanked them, then asked, "Did you know that my wife's birthday is coming up? She was born in the year of the ox."

If no Xiamen, no U.S.A.!

2008-09-14T07:49:00.003+08:00

U.S. to Expand Presence in Xiamen and Fujian?
The U.S. Consulate in Guangzhou, I hear, may be expanding its work in Fujian Province, including Xiamen! That's good news for Xiamen--and the U.S. as well. Fujian, especially Xiamen, is very strategic for the U.S., and has been for centuries. It's 1/3 of the way between Hong Kong and Shanghai, on the coast facing Taiwan, home to most Overseas Chinese, home to China's only Key university in a Special Economic Zone (Xiamen University), and, most importantly, my home. :)

No Xiamen, no U.S.A.?
And, as I told over 400 American business people in a luncheon in Guangzhou a couple years ago, after Condoleeza (sp.?) Rice's special advisor had lectured us for half an hour, had it not been for Xiamen, there would not even be a U.S. of A! Remember the Boston Tea Party? December, 1773--the tea tossed into the sea was Anxi tea, shipped out of Xiamen Harbor. So were it not for Xiamen we'd still be a British colony and our judges would be wearing white wigs. I rest my case.
Enjoy Amoy!
Dr. Bill www.amoymagic.com

Mooncake Game Origin and Rules

2008-09-13T16:29:00.003+08:00

Adapted from “Discover Gulangyu”《魅力鼓浪屿》

Mooncake Game was started about 1500 years ago by scholars craving success in imperial exams. The total of 63 prizes, based on various dice combinations, was named after imperial titles earned from the exam:

One prize for #1 Scholar (Zhuangyuan) The seven prize levels:

Highest 1. Zhuangyuan with Gold Flower

2. Hongliubo (6 fours)

3. Yaodianliubo (6 ones)

4. Heiliubo (6 of the same, except fours)

5. Wuhong (5 fours)

6. Wuzi (5 of the same, except fours)

Lowest 7. Sihong (4 fours)

Two prizes for No. 2 Scholar (Duitang) A straight.
Four prizes for No. 3 Scholar (Sanhong) Throw 3 fours
Eight prizes for No. 4 Scholar (Sijin) Throw 4 of the same, except fours
Sixteen prizes for No. 5 Scholar (Erju) Throw 2 fours
Thirty two prizes for No. 6 Scholar (Yixiu) Throw 1 four

Rules and names of dice combos have changed little over the centuries, but chips have changed from common coins to Zhuàngyuán chips and cakes (Gǔlàngyú’s are most famous). Oddly, some people in N.E. Fújiàn’s Fúdǐng County (福鼎县) speak S. Fújiàn dialect, and still use “Zhuàngyuán Chips”.

Legend has it that one of Koxinga’s officers adapted dice game rules to create the mooncake game in order to preoccupy homesick soldiers, and according to many Qīng Dynasty writers, such as Zhèng Dàjiǔ (郑大久), in “Taiwanese Folk Customs” (《台湾民俗》), for centuries afterwards Táiwān folk stayed up all night shouting and tossing dice to compete for the large flour cake with a red “Yuán” character in the center.

Today the mooncake game is found not only in S. Fújiàn and Táiwān but also, it appears, wherever you find overseas Chinese of Xiàmén ancestry. A reader e-mailed me to say, “We play the Mooncake Game in the Philippines too!” Perhaps. But only in Xiàmén is the game preserved virtually unchanged. Even during the “Cultural Revolution,” when all “old” thinking and practices were frowned upon, Xiamen folk tossed the dice for mooncakes—though furtively!

In 2003, Gǔlàngyú’s first annual Mooncake Game Cultural Festival attracted crowds of locals, as well as domestic and overseas visitors and the media, and since then the game has become more popular than ever—though mooncakes are no longer the prize of choice (mooncakes, like fruitcake in America, are traditional but not necessarily all that tasty). Prizes today are usually more practical, like shampoo, towels, thermoses, blankets, or cutlery.

Happy Mooncake Gambling!

2008-09-13T16:08:00.008+08:00

Mid-Autumn Festival (Zhōngqiūjié 中秋节), aka Moon Festival, on the 15^th day of the 8^th Luny month, is Xiàmén’s most festive occasion, thanks in part to our unique Mooncake Game.

You should know that the first person on the moon was not a man but a woman--not Neil Armstrong but Chang-O, a Chinese beauty who fled earth during to the Xià Dynasty (2205-1766 BC). During Moon Festival, worshippers of this Moon Goddess offer her moon-cakes, tea and fruit, and Hell money.

Before Moon Festival, people present mooncakes to family, friends, co-workers and bosses. In Táiwān’s private schools, teachers give mooncakes to students, and students reciprocate with a cash-stuffed Red Envelope—a practice XMU should adopt.

Girls used to believe that the later they went to sleep on Moon Festival Eve, the longer their mother would live, so many girls stayed up all night (I think I’d start worrying if my daughter yawned and turned in early that night).

Wealthy but unmarried girls past their prime used to throw an embroidered ball out their window into a crowd of single men who happened to be loitering about. She could choose whom to throw the ball to, and if he caught it he had to marry her.

If he didn’t live happily ever after, he at least had a ball.

In the evening, families reunite to eat mooncakes, drink wine, guess riddles, and in Southern Fújiàn and Táiwān, play the “mooncake game” that some say Koxinga invented to keep his homesick troops occupied after they kicked the Dutch out of Táiwān.

Moon-Cake Game players take turns tossing 6 mahjong dice into a bowl, taking care that none bounce out (or they lose a turn).

Prizes range from tiny cookies to medium and large mooncakes, with each representing an official position won in the ancient imperial exams. The one grand prize, Zhuàngyuán (状元), represents #1 scholar; Duìtáng (对堂) is #2 scholar; Sānhóng (三红) is #3 scholar, etc.

The green bean and egg and fruit stuffed mooncakes are not the tastiest concoctions but they are traditional, kind of like fruitcakes back home, which are more or less edible but serve better as doorstops, paperweights and hand weapons. Nowadays, many Chinese are replacing mooncakes with fruits, food, or practical items like towels, toothpaste, and detergent. Our family wins enough toothpaste each year to last out the year. If we ever miss Moon Festival, our dentist will be first to know.

The mooncake game is fun, even addicting. When our sons were small, they played all year, competing for cakes they had carefully drawn and cut from cardboard.

They were probably just as tasty as the real thing.

Mooncake game rules can be confusing. For example, even if you win the Zhuàngyuán, someone else can abscond with it by throwing a higher winning combination. But not to worry. The game is really a piece of cake. Just study the rules I provide on the next page and you can learn the ropes before your Chinese hosts hang you with them.

Happy Holidays in China!

2008-09-13T15:57:00.004+08:00

Happy Holidays! Which ones? Take your pick! Over the past 5,020 years, [I was told China is 5000 years old but that was 20 years ago) Chinese have created so many holidays that it’s a wonder they don’t celebrate non-holidays for being so rare. And some Minnan traditions, like Mid-autumn Festival mooncake games, are unlike anything else in

China

(see next post).

To add to the merry mayhem, and perhaps as an excuse to celebrate the rare days that aren’t already holidays, Chinese are also adopting Western holidays.

Santa Bless You! There was not a Christmas tree in site when we came in 1988, but now Chinese seem to celebrate the Yuletide as much as we do. Even post offices have Christmas trees, and church loudspeakers broadcast traditional hymns like Silent Night, We Three Kings, Frosty the Snowman and Jingle Bells. We can even buy Christmas cards, like the classic that says, “Santa Bless You!”

Heart to Heart Chinese have also taken to Valentine’s Day with a passion (literally!). A girl gas station attendant in a remote town asked me, “Did you buy your wife flowers? It’s that day, you know!” Shops and stalls are full of roses. Kids sell them on street sides. And stores have Valentine’s cards, and cute little sweetheart figurines—with a Chinese slant to them!

One student said, “We Chinese learned about Valentines from the West.” I said, “With a 1.3 billion population, I doubt it!”

Buffaloed and Bamboozled

2008-09-13T11:23:00.007+08:00

Back in the early 1990s I was surprised by a string of China Daily articles claiming that trditional Chinese medicine cured everything from Aids to acne and baldness. We've come to see that such inflated claims are common. What surprises me is that people so readily believe them...

Bamboozled! In late 1999, I spent two months in a Hong Kong hospital. When I returned home to Xiamen University, a Chinese professor of literature visited me, doffed his shirt, and demonstrated vigorously how to use a 25 cent bamboo back scratcher. "Do this three tines a day," he said, "and you'll never have cancer again!" As he scoured his back, arms and belly, he added, "But you have to use a bamboo back scratcher. "No others work."

Another Nail in the Coughin’ Years ago, when our young sons' had colds and fevers that lasted a couple weeks, another famous professor told us that a certain award-winning cough medicine cured colds in 3 days, guaranteed. When I asked him why his own daughter had not been cured of the cold she’d had for over a week, he glared at me as if he understood why some animals ate their young, and replied, “It’s a different cold than last week.”

Rubbed the Wrong Way One Chinese Doctor heard Matthew had a fever and showed up on our doorstep, uninvited, waltzed in, vigorously rubbed a silver coin on Matt’s forehead, and pronounced, “Now the fever is gone.” and rose to make a dignified departure.

“Wait a minute,” I said, "let me check. I took Matt’s temperature. “It’s still 104!” I said.

“No it isn’t,” the doctor said. “The silver coin always works, so the thermometer is wrong.” And he packed up his satchel and left.

An Arm and a Leg Some medicines do work, of course, and even cure what Western medicine` cannot—like some kinds of asthma. And I know an herbalist who has cured king cobra bites with herbs. “I’ve never lost a patient!” he boasted. “If they had gone to a hospital instead, they would have had at least an arm or a leg amputated.”

“That’s nothing!” I said. “American hospitals charge an arm and a leg!”

Buffaloed! This brings us to the buffalo horn Chinese comb (I combed the country to find this!). The package claims (and I quote!):

“Comb having a long history in China. The pure natural horn of ox or sheep is being adopted to form the highly finished product through modern scientific technology. Using comb… will expel the fire-evil of the head and remove the scrap from the scalp with the most tender and comfort feeling resulting to smooth the skin and protect the hair to clear the mind to regulate the vital energy and blood of the whole body and improve the peripheral blood circulation. IT is beneficial to grey hair and loss of hair and it has the effect of decreasing fatty material in the blood and regulating blood pressure.” MADE IN CHINA

It is amazing that they can make such claims, in writing, with a straight face! But even more amazing is the fact that many Chinese believe them! But I guess we Americans are just as gullible.

You don't really "see" home until you've left it for awhile and returned. Almost every time I return to the U.S., someone tries to involve me in some multi-level scheme to get rich from using and selling the latest health cure-all. How about $30 for a bottle of fruit sugar pills? And magnetized bracelets are attracting a following with claims to cure everything from high blood pressure (if worn on the right wrist) to arthritis, sports injuries and impotence. A friend gave me a bed mattress with small round magnets scattered throughout it; said it would take 20 years off my age, and he was almost right. They stabbed me in the back every time I tried to sleep and took at least 20 years off my life, if not my age.

I laugh at the naivete of Chinese, but it seems we Americans also strain at gnats and swallow camels.

Enjoy Amoy!

Dr. Bill
Xiamen University MBA Center
www.amoymagic.com

Style of Nothingness-Seduction of Accessories

2008-09-11T22:32:00.003+08:00

Just passed through Seoul's Incheon Airport today--my favorite airport, which is convenient because our favorite airlines is Korean Airlines. The simplest (and usually cheapest) route from California to Xiamen is Korean Airlines from Los Angeles International Airport (LAX) to Seoul to Xiamen. And while at the Seoul airport, we enjoy the free internet, nice lounges with couches to lay on, and the relative quiet.

Sometime over the past year they've removed the airport, adding a museum-like display of traditional Chinese art and costumes near the lounge. I like the Asian clothing--sleeves that are two feet too long, waists that could fit someone 60 inches in girth, all bound up. They say it's style but I just think that in the old days the tailors didn't have measuring tapes. Still--some beautiful costumers. The elegance reminds me somewhat of Japan (imagine having a little slippered Japanese wife following behind! Of course, my made-in-Taiwan blonde wife Susan follows me behind, but not demurely; it's usually to keep me in line...).

But though I enjoy Seoul airport's museum-like displays, I think they should work on the English-unless they seriously mean for their English motto to really be "Style of Nothingness, Seduction of Accessories." Because in fact there is a lot of nothing to many styles nowadays, and people do seemed to be seduced by accessories--and in China as well.

Last year, before I passed out the final exams, my students handed me an elegantly packaged dunhill leather belt (probably fake, of course). I've seen belts sold in Xiamen for $300 USD! What on earth is the point? I can get a perfectly service belt on the night market for $5 USD!

Of course, it probably looks like a $5 belt, and lasts perhaps twice as long as the Chinese minister of commerce's famous "One Day" Shoes" that sparked an anti-shoddy quality campaign about ten years ago.
Enjoy Amoy!
Dr. Bill Xiamen University MBA Center

Well.... here's a scan of the Style of Nothingness Seduction of Accessories brochure from the Korean Airport. I'm not sure if they really mean it, or someone was having fun with the translation--but the airport itself is a delight, so visit Seoul and indulge in the style of nothingness.

No Xiamen--No U.S.A.!

2008-09-09T06:43:00.002+08:00

U.S. Presence to Expand in Xiamen!
The U.S. Consulate in Guangzhou e-mailed and they are expanding their presence in Fujian Province, including Xiamen! That's good news for Xiamen--and the U.S. as well. Fujian, especially Xiamen, is very strategic for the U.S., and has been for centuries. It's 1/3 of the way between Hong Kong and Shanghai, on the coast facing Taiwan, home to most Overseas Chinese, home to China's only Key university in a Special Economic Zone (Xiamen University), and, most importantly, my home. :)

No Xiamen, no U.S.A.?
And, as I told over 400 American business people in a luncheon in Guangzhou a couple years ago, after Condoleeza (sp.?) Rice's special advisor had lectured us for half an hour, had it not been for Xiamen, there would not even be a U.S. of A! Remember the Boston Tea Party? December, 1773--the tea tossed into the sea was Anxi tea, shipped out of Xiamen Harbor. So were it not for Xiamen we'd still be a British colony and our judges would be wearing white wigs. I rest my case.

No Xiamen, No New World?
By the way, Columbus was not seeking a New World but a shortcut to an ancient world. His goal? India, or China (specifically, Zaytun, ancient start of the Maritime Silk Route, which is Quanzhou, 70 km. to the north of us in Xiamen). Columbus' copy of Marco Polo's Travels was dog-eared and underlined on the pages about Zaytun, which told of its fabulous wealth. "For every ship laden with pepper sailing out of Christendom, 100 sail from Zaytun", he wrote (I paraphrase, as its from memory, but I'm sure it was pepper, or Dr. Pepper, or perhaps it was Pepsi).

So...no Xiamen (which was Zaytun's deepest port), no America!
Enjoy Amoy!

The Ancient Chinese IRS

2008-09-08T13:02:00.003+08:00

As I work on the book "Old Amoy in Foreigners' Eyes", using old texts and photos from my home library (Click here for a partial list), I come across some fascinating insights. This passage from one of MacGowan's books was about the ancient system of taxes, which was not overly oppressive, and the tactics of tax collectors--which were oppressive indeed. Read on to learn about the ANCIENT CHINESE INFERNAL REVENUE SERVICE!
Bill Brown Magic Xiamen--Guide to Xiamen and Fujian

Reverend John MacGowan, Lights and Shadows of Chinese Life, North China Daily News and Herald Limited, Shanghai 1909

FEW TAXES p. 3
With the exception of the dues collected at the various custom houses throughout the country, the only direct tax imposed by the Imperial Government is the land tax. Taxes for education, for the army and navy, for the defence of the Empire, as well as rates for the police, the poor, etc., are absolutely unknown. The civil list in China is a very model of simplicity, and gives the executive very little anxiety, for there are automatic systems that have been in existence from the earliest times that provide for the salaries and expenses of public servants in a manner highly satisfactory to everyone, excepting to the long-suffering masses from whom the money is extracted.

LAND TAX
The land tax… is a fixed one and was settled in A.D. 1644, when the present dynasty came into power. The land registers were then revised, and the amount that every man’s farm or holding had to pay was fixed by the imperial authorities. This seems to have been done in a very fair and generous spirit. The Government which affects to be a paternal one showed in this case, at least, great anxiety that this tax should not be an oppressive one….

As lands vary greatly in fertility, there was no uniformity in the levying of these taxes…in all cases due care has been taken that the farmers shall not be unduly distressed.

The Ancient Chinese IRS
Now whilst the land tax is in itself a very moderate one, the method of its collection renders it very oppressive, and certainly at all times it is more or less a source of trouble and vexation. The Government has entrusted the collection of it to a body of men that are notoriously of ill-repute, and who fro the very nature of the case must be dishonest. Not only have they no salaries, but they have actually to purchase their positions. The only privilege they demand in return for this outlay of their money is a free hand to get as much out of the people, by guile, by ruse, or by cunning, as they can; only they must be careful that everything they do must have an appearance of legality. Law, and ancient custom, and hoary traditions are sacred in the eyes of the Chinese, but there are a thousand-and-one ways by which these may be evaded, while the semblance of respect for them is still maintained.

A free-handed system like this exactly suits the genius of the Chinese, who prefer oblique methods to direct ones. It opens out a boundless field, where money can be gained more easily than by settled salaries….

Day One

Greetings from Amoy (old name for Xiamen, Fujian). I tried this a couple years ago and never got anywhere. I'll try again. I'm in California but headed back to Xiamen in 5 days, after 10 weeks in California researching for a couple of historical books I'm writing about Xiamen, my home for over 20 years.
Visit our main website, AmoyMagic -- Guide to Xiamen and Fujian

Also check out the historical texts and photos for the Amoy Mission Project.

Enjoy Amoy!

Dr. Bill
Xiamen University
Xiamen, Fujian

Way Off the Wall--Two Decades in the Dragon

2008-09-08T10:36:00.001+08:00

I've written a monthly "Off the Wall" newsletter for friends and family ever since we arrived in Xiamen (former Amoy) back in October 1988. I've toyed with the idea of an Off the Wall blog for years, so now I'll give it a go. Not sure if anyone will read it or not, but... here's life in China from the perspective of an American family who has been here 20 years.

No Change in China People often ask me, "Have you seen a lot of change in China?" I answer, "Nope! No change! Taxi drivers don't have any change. Bankers don't have any change...."

360 Degrees of Change But seriously, there has been lots of change. The difference between China today and China of 1988 is night and day. As a Xiamen University graduate student in Economics told me, "In the past 20 years China has turned around 360 degrees!" That guy will make a good economist--in Beijing or Washington (or the way things are going, both).

Bill Brown
Xiamen University
www.amoymagic.com

Way Off the Wall (Life in Xiamen Fujian China)

David Brainard Woodward

For Unto Us a Charlie's Born

Davey Crockett in China?

Peter Pan in China?

Foreign Income but no W2 -- what to do on your 1040

Healthx24.com Croatian Attack

Manager Job Opening in Xiamen

Millennium Harbourview Hotel -- 5-Star Angels?

Xiamen Rent a Car

Free legal software to remove DRM from audio files

Xiamen Olympic Museum

World's Largest Organ Museum

Medical Prescriptions in Xiamen

Lose 100 Pounds in 6 Months Guaranteed!

4th of July in Xiamen --1921!

The Great Firewall

How to Unanswer E-mails!

The Mother of Mother's Day

Princeton Premier Business Leaders and Professionals Honors Edition

Chinese vs. American Culture

Lin Yutang on the Futility of Force

Proof: U.S. Government is Taoist!

This Folder is Shared with Other People [ cannot move error]

20 Ounces or 12?

Ambassador von Royen in Xiamen!

Xiamen Vacation!

Dutch Retake Xiamen & Tigers

Napoleon of Nanputuo Temple! (Xiamen)

I Wanna Hold Your Hand!

100 Mayors TV

Xiamen-Hotel California of China (1860s)

Spring Cleaning in Xiamen, 1860s

Xiamen 4th of July, 1891

Western Food in Xiamen (1856)

Famished at the Feast

Stranger Creature Cuisine (1880s)

U.S. Guangzhou Consulate Move to Xiamen?

Xiamen Typhoon (1920s)

International Settlements in China?

Chang Gung Hospital 厦门长庚医院

中国——我们的红娘 - 潘维廉博士（美）

Xiamen University's Many Firsts

是如何来到这里的 或 天堂之...

A Sign from the Heavens (How I got here)

Insane Amoy Dialect?

Scottish Medical Secretaries

There IS American Cuisine

Chinese Judge and the Pig Whisperer

The U,S, Consul on Xiamen Law (1893)

Who Will Run Xiamen's Foreign Consulates?

Melamine in Whiskas Cat food?

What Teachers Make (Much more than Money!)

100 Chinese Surnames; Sorry--Wang Number

Windows 64 Crashes Firefox? How to fix it

Paint, Thinner and Vanilla

Long Arm of the ATM (in Xiamen Banks)

Xiamen's Stairway to Heaven

Media Notice from U.S. Consulate

Coffee on Gulangyu (and hotels and hostels)

Learning Hokkien in Old Xiamen

United States Consulate in Xiamen China ?

Ahoy from Amoy (Common Talk Highlights)

Art of Chinese Mini-Bussing

Froggy Food in China

Millennium Harbourview Hotel Xiamen (Xiamen's Best Hotel)

Why Chinese Dogs are Shy

These are the Magi--Gift-Giving in China

If no Xiamen, no U.S.A.!

Mooncake Game Origin and Rules

Happy Mooncake Gambling!

You should know that the first person on the moon was not a man but a woman--not Neil Armstrong but Chang-O, a Chinese beauty who fled earth during to the Xià Dynasty (2205-1766 BC). During Moon Festival, worshippers of this Moon Goddess offer her moon-cakes, tea and fruit, and Hell money.

Happy Holidays in China!

Buffaloed and Bamboozled

Style of Nothingness-Seduction of Accessories

No Xiamen--No U.S.A.!

The Ancient Chinese IRS

Day One

Way Off the Wall--Two Decades in the Dragon

是如何来到这里的或天堂之...