Where do you put foreign income on the IRS Form 1040 when you file your tax return if you work overseas, as I do in China, and do not have a W2? I just spent half an hour on the phone with a very patient and helpful IRS expert on foreign income--and learned that the income goes on the 1040 Form Line 7, just like U.S. wages and salaries--even if you do not have the W2 to attach.
This was a relief to have confirmed, because the past week I've been facing an issue with U.S. finances, where I was told by experts that I had to provide a W2 for foreign income on Line 7--even though they admitted W2s are only provided in the U.S. But as the IRS man explained, wages and salaries are reported on Line 7, regardless of where they are earned, and if no W2, it goes there anyway (I had put it under "other income" a few years, which he said was clearly wrong--though thankfully they did not take me to task for it).
I know many others have had this problem, and hope this clears it up. If still doubtful, refer to the Form 1040 Instructions, Page 19 (for 2010 at least), which explains it quite clearly.
Thanks to the IRS for explaining that (and, I have to add, I've phoned them several times from China to ask about tricky issues, and they've always been quite helpful).
Enjoy Amoy!
Bill
Bill Brown
Xiamen University
www.amoymagic.com
Friday, July 29, 2011
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
Healthx24.com Croatian Attack
Lost Face Book, Blogger, Croatian Attacks, etc.
Blogger is still blocked in China, as is Face Book (maybe China can start their own, called "Lost Face" Book) and Twitter. Personally, I don't miss Facebook (or Lostface Book) or Twitter, but do miss the blog.
But I used a VPN to make a serious warning. A friend's email address book was hijacked and messages sent to all friends with links to www.healthx24.com DO NOT click this! It is based in Croatia, and will open you up to who knows what (in face, not even who knows what yet).
Happy Mooncake Game, for those of you celebrating the Mid-Autumn Festival in Xiamen (Amoy). This is, by far, our liveliest time of the year, even more so than Chinese New Year, because of the unique "cake gambling game", which was supposedly invented (or at least perfected) by Koxinga almost 350 years ago to keep his homesick troops preoccupied.
Read about the Mooncake Gambling Game in my book Magic Xiamen (formerly Amoy Magic), or click here for a brief overview (scroll down the page though):
http://www.amoymagic.com/custom.htm
Enjoy Amoy!
Bill
Just a quick note, folks!
Bill Brown Xiamen University www.amoymagic.com
Blogger is still blocked in China, as is Face Book (maybe China can start their own, called "Lost Face" Book) and Twitter. Personally, I don't miss Facebook (or Lostface Book) or Twitter, but do miss the blog.
But I used a VPN to make a serious warning. A friend's email address book was hijacked and messages sent to all friends with links to www.healthx24.com DO NOT click this! It is based in Croatia, and will open you up to who knows what (in face, not even who knows what yet).
Happy Mooncake Game, for those of you celebrating the Mid-Autumn Festival in Xiamen (Amoy). This is, by far, our liveliest time of the year, even more so than Chinese New Year, because of the unique "cake gambling game", which was supposedly invented (or at least perfected) by Koxinga almost 350 years ago to keep his homesick troops preoccupied.
Read about the Mooncake Gambling Game in my book Magic Xiamen (formerly Amoy Magic), or click here for a brief overview (scroll down the page though):
http://www.amoymagic.com/custom.htm
Enjoy Amoy!
Bill
Just a quick note, folks!
Bill Brown Xiamen University www.amoymagic.com
Tuesday, August 18, 2009
Manager Job Opening in Xiamen
Bill Brown ... Xiamen University
I just received a note that a Xiamen firm seeks an expat (or Taiwan or Hong Kong resident) manager, age 30 to 40.
The link is at the bottom of this blog entry.
Note that the English requirements say "Kill and Experience Required." I think they meant to add an "S" in front of Kill (unless they're looking for a 007-type manager?).
Bill
(Job Responsibilities & Requirements)： JOB TITLE: QS/Tender Manager
REPORTING TO:City General Manager
LOCATION: Xiamen City
1.PRINCIPAL ACCOUNTABILITIES:
a.Project Cost Estimate Preparation or Review
b.Preparation of Cost Ledger
c.Sourcing, Assessment, Prequalification / Screening of Contractors ＆ Suppliers
d.Preparation or Review of Bid Documents
e.Administration of Bidding / Tendering Process
f.Preparation or Review of Contract Documents
g.Regular Project Budget Monitoring / Preparation of Cash Flow Projections
h.Payment Evaluation / Recommendation
i.Change Order Evaluation
j.Preparation or Review of Final Accounting of Construction Project
2.KILL AND EXPERIENCE REQUIRED:
Knowledge: Quantity Surveying / Cost Estimation, Project Construction
Education: Engineering degree （Civil）
Skills:organizing / management skills, negotiation skills, written and oral language skills （English and/or Chinese）, computer literacy, construction contract writing / reviewing
Experience: Quantity Surveying / Contracts or Tender Management / Construction Management
E-mail Mr. Emerson Chan, HR Supervisor, at: zhifu.chen@dfre.com.cn
Click Here for Full Info
Click Here for full Job info
www.amoymagic.com
I just received a note that a Xiamen firm seeks an expat (or Taiwan or Hong Kong resident) manager, age 30 to 40.
The link is at the bottom of this blog entry.
Note that the English requirements say "Kill and Experience Required." I think they meant to add an "S" in front of Kill (unless they're looking for a 007-type manager?).
Bill
(Job Responsibilities & Requirements)： JOB TITLE: QS/Tender Manager
REPORTING TO:City General Manager
LOCATION: Xiamen City
1.PRINCIPAL ACCOUNTABILITIES:
a.Project Cost Estimate Preparation or Review
b.Preparation of Cost Ledger
c.Sourcing, Assessment, Prequalification / Screening of Contractors ＆ Suppliers
d.Preparation or Review of Bid Documents
e.Administration of Bidding / Tendering Process
f.Preparation or Review of Contract Documents
g.Regular Project Budget Monitoring / Preparation of Cash Flow Projections
h.Payment Evaluation / Recommendation
i.Change Order Evaluation
j.Preparation or Review of Final Accounting of Construction Project
2.KILL AND EXPERIENCE REQUIRED:
Knowledge: Quantity Surveying / Cost Estimation, Project Construction
Education: Engineering degree （Civil）
Skills:organizing / management skills, negotiation skills, written and oral language skills （English and/or Chinese）, computer literacy, construction contract writing / reviewing
Experience: Quantity Surveying / Contracts or Tender Management / Construction Management
E-mail Mr. Emerson Chan, HR Supervisor, at: zhifu.chen@dfre.com.cn
Tel:0592-5859591*206
0592-5826089
Fax:0592-5859589
Website:www.dfre.com.cn
| | 厦门顶峰房地产开发有限公 |
| |||||||||||
| 职位基本要求 | |||||||||||
| |||||||||||
Click Here for full Job info
www.amoymagic.com
Thursday, August 6, 2009
Millennium Harbourview Hotel -- 5-Star Angels?
Bill Brown ... Xiamen University
Xiamen's Best Hotels
I've often said that the best hotel in Xiamen is the Millennium Harbourview Hotel Xiamen because of the great location, excellent cuisines (best Italian in town), and excellent service. So today I was happy to come across this Yahoo review about the Millennium (the Millennium even found his lost luggage and helped him buy new clothes!). The review noted it had 5-star service and amenities. It's ironic, because Xiamen websites list it as 4-star, but many of the so-called 5-star hotels in Xiamen have 4-star or even 3-star. In my eyes, Millennium is the star.
Xiamen's Best Hotels
I've often said that the best hotel in Xiamen is the Millennium Harbourview Hotel Xiamen because of the great location, excellent cuisines (best Italian in town), and excellent service. So today I was happy to come across this Yahoo review about the Millennium (the Millennium even found his lost luggage and helped him buy new clothes!). The review noted it had 5-star service and amenities. It's ironic, because Xiamen websites list it as 4-star, but many of the so-called 5-star hotels in Xiamen have 4-star or even 3-star. In my eyes, Millennium is the star.
www.amoymagic.comIncredible Service!
By A Yahoo! Contributor, 06/29/09
This was my favorite stay on my business trips over this past month. The location was amazing, right in the downtown but within view of Gulangyu Island. When my luggage was lost by the airlines, the hotel's Concierge called the airlines continuously and got my luggage delivered straight to me. Meanwhile I had no clothes aside from what I was wearing, since they were all in my lost luggage, but a charming angel at Guest Relations walked with me to the nearby Trustmart and helped me buy a set of clothes.
The room was comfortable, all the standard 5 star amenities, and the breakfast was great. The hotel is priceless and I will be returning every time on my following visits. Thank you Millennium Harbourview for the amazing experience!!!
http://travel.yahoo.com/p-travelguide-482571-xiamen_vacations-i
Sunday, August 2, 2009
Xiamen Rent a Car
Bill Brown ... Xiamen University
It is now possible to rent a car in Xiamen, with a driver or to drive yourself--but caution is in order!
First, driving a car in China is totally unlike driving back home. It is automotive warfare, survival of the fastest. Don't believe me? Read "Darwinian Driving--Survival of the Fastest." While it is humorous, it is also 100% true (as even Chinese friends have admitted).
Still want to rent a car in Xiamen? There are various websites, but as far as I can find, they are all in Chinese. But if you can't read Chinese, you'll have problems anyway. Many cities have signs full of Chinese writing warning against this or that on this street or in that area. I've only had 3 tickets in my 30+ years of driving in the U.S., but I had 3 in China within 30 days of getting my license back in 1993.
Still, if you're careful, you'll find that driving in China is not only survivable but even enjoyable (in China, who needs Nintendo or Wii or Play Station if you have a car, and streets full of cars and pedestrians to dodge--or, on occasion, hit). Driving really frees you up, and we've put 200,000 km. on our two cars, even driving 40,000 km. to Tibet and Back, in 1994 (through the Gobi Desert no less, in our 2-wheel drive Toy Ota).
Try this website for cars ranging from 250 Yuan to 1200 Yuan a day:
http://www.xm-lease.net/
And do read about Darwinian Driving in China!
Also check out Tibet in 80 Days
Enjoy Amoy!
Dr. Bill
www.amoymagic.com
It is now possible to rent a car in Xiamen, with a driver or to drive yourself--but caution is in order!
First, driving a car in China is totally unlike driving back home. It is automotive warfare, survival of the fastest. Don't believe me? Read "Darwinian Driving--Survival of the Fastest." While it is humorous, it is also 100% true (as even Chinese friends have admitted).Still want to rent a car in Xiamen? There are various websites, but as far as I can find, they are all in Chinese. But if you can't read Chinese, you'll have problems anyway. Many cities have signs full of Chinese writing warning against this or that on this street or in that area. I've only had 3 tickets in my 30+ years of driving in the U.S., but I had 3 in China within 30 days of getting my license back in 1993.
Still, if you're careful, you'll find that driving in China is not only survivable but even enjoyable (in China, who needs Nintendo or Wii or Play Station if you have a car, and streets full of cars and pedestrians to dodge--or, on occasion, hit). Driving really frees you up, and we've put 200,000 km. on our two cars, even driving 40,000 km. to Tibet and Back, in 1994 (through the Gobi Desert no less, in our 2-wheel drive Toy Ota).
Try this website for cars ranging from 250 Yuan to 1200 Yuan a day:
http://www.xm-lease.net/
And do read about Darwinian Driving in China!
Also check out Tibet in 80 Days
Enjoy Amoy!
Dr. Bill
www.amoymagic.com
Free legal software to remove DRM from audio files
Bill Brown ... Xiamen University
I was frustrated to find that the album I bought online was DRM protected WMA files. While the site had claimed they could be played on MP3 players, they could not. They worked on my computer, but not on my iPod shuffle (a dinosaur-version, given to me by my sister years ago), or my Philips MP3 player. Itunes would not play them because it said they were protected and could not be converted.
I spent hours searching for ways to remove the DRM (after all, I did not illegally download these, but paid for them from a reputable site; I should be able to play them). The internet is chock full of links to Free DRM removal software and DRM free software and every combination you can think of--all throwing in the word FREE to get you to click. But almost everyone ended up charging $30 or $40 or more to convert more than 30 seconds or so. But I found a FREE Solution!
First...if the files are DRM Free (no DRM protection), you can convert WMA to MP3 easily, quickly, and for free with a FREEWARE program (not a trial--really free), called Switch Audio Converter. While they do urge you to pay for the upgraded version, their free WMA to MP3 conversion software works fine. I just used it--and it works for both Windows and MAC. (And, by the way, I receive no commission for referring you; I just hope you can avoid the hours of fruitless searching that I spend downloading, installing, and then uninstalling and deleting a dozen programs that claimed to be free but were not).
The next part-- removing DRM for free-- is trickier. The only easy to use Freeware that I could find was AnalogWhole. Actually, I'd think that removing DRM would be illegal, but Analog gets around this by playing the file on your computer and recording it as an unprotected copy. This is real time, so it takes 30 minutes to convert a 30 minute audio file. Slow--but it is 100% free DRM removal software. The other disadvantage, though, is that as it records the file being played, it picks up ambient noise (taps on the computer, movement, etc.). The background noise was distracting. You have to adjust the microphones just right (it helps you do this), because too low and you can't hear the DRM free copy, but too high and you get distortion, and it picks up everything from computer noise to your intestines digesting the previous night's pizza. Still...for free, who can complain.
The Best Solution for Converting DRM protected files? Don't buy them in the first place, if you can possibly avoid it. I understand the reasoning behind them, but it penalizes those of us who do buy legal copies, for our own personal Fair Use. But if, like me last night, you pay good money for files that you can't play on your MP3 player, then the above is the only really free solution that I could find.
If you know of better free solutions to removing DRM protection, please share them.
In closing--I am assuming that anyone reading this is seeking a way to remove DRM encoding from audio or video files that were obtained legally, and are being used legally--not shared!
Enjoy Amoy!
Bill
www.amoymagic.com
I was frustrated to find that the album I bought online was DRM protected WMA files. While the site had claimed they could be played on MP3 players, they could not. They worked on my computer, but not on my iPod shuffle (a dinosaur-version, given to me by my sister years ago), or my Philips MP3 player. Itunes would not play them because it said they were protected and could not be converted.
I spent hours searching for ways to remove the DRM (after all, I did not illegally download these, but paid for them from a reputable site; I should be able to play them). The internet is chock full of links to Free DRM removal software and DRM free software and every combination you can think of--all throwing in the word FREE to get you to click. But almost everyone ended up charging $30 or $40 or more to convert more than 30 seconds or so. But I found a FREE Solution!
First...if the files are DRM Free (no DRM protection), you can convert WMA to MP3 easily, quickly, and for free with a FREEWARE program (not a trial--really free), called Switch Audio Converter. While they do urge you to pay for the upgraded version, their free WMA to MP3 conversion software works fine. I just used it--and it works for both Windows and MAC. (And, by the way, I receive no commission for referring you; I just hope you can avoid the hours of fruitless searching that I spend downloading, installing, and then uninstalling and deleting a dozen programs that claimed to be free but were not).
The next part-- removing DRM for free-- is trickier. The only easy to use Freeware that I could find was AnalogWhole. Actually, I'd think that removing DRM would be illegal, but Analog gets around this by playing the file on your computer and recording it as an unprotected copy. This is real time, so it takes 30 minutes to convert a 30 minute audio file. Slow--but it is 100% free DRM removal software. The other disadvantage, though, is that as it records the file being played, it picks up ambient noise (taps on the computer, movement, etc.). The background noise was distracting. You have to adjust the microphones just right (it helps you do this), because too low and you can't hear the DRM free copy, but too high and you get distortion, and it picks up everything from computer noise to your intestines digesting the previous night's pizza. Still...for free, who can complain.
The Best Solution for Converting DRM protected files? Don't buy them in the first place, if you can possibly avoid it. I understand the reasoning behind them, but it penalizes those of us who do buy legal copies, for our own personal Fair Use. But if, like me last night, you pay good money for files that you can't play on your MP3 player, then the above is the only really free solution that I could find.
If you know of better free solutions to removing DRM protection, please share them.
In closing--I am assuming that anyone reading this is seeking a way to remove DRM encoding from audio or video files that were obtained legally, and are being used legally--not shared!
Enjoy Amoy!
Bill
www.amoymagic.com
Saturday, August 1, 2009
Xiamen Olympic Museum
Bill Brown ... Xiamen niversity
The Xiamen Olympic Museum, the only one of its kind in China approved by both the Chinese Olympic Committee and the International Olympic committee, now has a nice English Web Site.
Visit the museum, and nearby, on the Island Ring Road, note the 99 slightly larger than life bronze statues of marathon runners. The winner is, as happens every year, an African runner. Last in place is a "runner" in a wheelchair, being pushed by a friend (a nice touch, as Xiamen has numerous programs to encourage physically challenged locals to get involved in sports, which is why the Fresno-based "Break the Barriers" program received record media attention when they performed in Xiamen).
See "Break the Barriers Proves Anti-Gravity in Xiamen."
Also check out our beautiful 6km. (actually, 5.9 km). Xiamen Boardwalk.
www.amoymagic.com
The Xiamen Olympic Museum, the only one of its kind in China approved by both the Chinese Olympic Committee and the International Olympic committee, now has a nice English Web Site.
Visit the museum, and nearby, on the Island Ring Road, note the 99 slightly larger than life bronze statues of marathon runners. The winner is, as happens every year, an African runner. Last in place is a "runner" in a wheelchair, being pushed by a friend (a nice touch, as Xiamen has numerous programs to encourage physically challenged locals to get involved in sports, which is why the Fresno-based "Break the Barriers" program received record media attention when they performed in Xiamen). 
See "Break the Barriers Proves Anti-Gravity in Xiamen."
Also check out our beautiful 6km. (actually, 5.9 km). Xiamen Boardwalk.
www.amoymagic.com
World's Largest Organ Museum
Bill Brown
Hu Youyi, the Gulangyu-born piano collector who now resides in Australia and founded Gulangyu's Piano Museum (the largest in Asia, and the only one in China), has also built the world's largest organ museum on Gulangyu (no, it is not a museum for the world's largest organ, but the largest museum for organs; I just know someone would grab hold of that).
The museum has more than 100 organs, including over 30 varieties of reed organs, accordions, pianicas and three large-scale pipe organs.
It is in the Bagua Lou (Eight Diagram Building--the prominent domed building that resembles a consulate).
Xiamen University
www.amoymagic.com
Hu Youyi, the Gulangyu-born piano collector who now resides in Australia and founded Gulangyu's Piano Museum (the largest in Asia, and the only one in China), has also built the world's largest organ museum on Gulangyu (no, it is not a museum for the world's largest organ, but the largest museum for organs; I just know someone would grab hold of that).The museum has more than 100 organs, including over 30 varieties of reed organs, accordions, pianicas and three large-scale pipe organs.
It is in the Bagua Lou (Eight Diagram Building--the prominent domed building that resembles a consulate).
Xiamen University
www.amoymagic.com
Medical Prescriptions in Xiamen
Bill Brown Xiamen University
30 July 2009, Ms. K.S. wrote:
HI there,
I am moving to Xiamen from New York City in a few weeks. I take some prescribed medications. I am hoping you can tell me whether or not I will be able to get them in Xiamen as well. I regularly take Adderall. Do you have this medicine there? Is it easily available? Is it expensive? Who do I need to get a prescription from in China, a physician or psychiatrist? Should I bring a letter from my doctor here?
I hope you can help! I am desperate to find out as it may affect my trip.
Thank you for your time.
All the best,
K,S,
My reply: I think you need not worry, especially with the opening of the Chenggang Hospital (check our site's Xiamen Hospitals page). Many prescription meds are available over the counter. Those that aren't, you can get prescriptions at hospitals (we prefer Chenggang). But meds such as sleeping meds are generally doled out only half a dozen pills at a time, meaning a trip once or twice a week to the hospital, which is a pain, so you might want to bring a supply of those.
Enjoy Xiamen!
Bill
www.amoymagic.com
30 July 2009, Ms. K.S. wrote:
HI there,
I am moving to Xiamen from New York City in a few weeks. I take some prescribed medications. I am hoping you can tell me whether or not I will be able to get them in Xiamen as well. I regularly take Adderall. Do you have this medicine there? Is it easily available? Is it expensive? Who do I need to get a prescription from in China, a physician or psychiatrist? Should I bring a letter from my doctor here?
I hope you can help! I am desperate to find out as it may affect my trip.
Thank you for your time.
All the best,
K,S,
My reply: I think you need not worry, especially with the opening of the Chenggang Hospital (check our site's Xiamen Hospitals page). Many prescription meds are available over the counter. Those that aren't, you can get prescriptions at hospitals (we prefer Chenggang). But meds such as sleeping meds are generally doled out only half a dozen pills at a time, meaning a trip once or twice a week to the hospital, which is a pain, so you might want to bring a supply of those.
www.amoymagic.com
Sunday, July 19, 2009
Lose 100 Pounds in 6 Months Guaranteed!
Bill Brown ... Xiamen University
According to recent research, six foods will keep you so full and satisfied that, in theory, you would have negative weight in weeks.
No less an authority than Liz Vaccariello, Editor-in-Chief, PREVENTION, wrote on Sat Jun 27, 2009: (I edit it down considerably):
Eggs quell hunger. Women on low-fat diets who ate 2 eggs for breakfast at least 5 days a week lost 65% more weight and averaged 83% greater reduction in waist size (substitute low-fat yogurt for eggs if you're vegan).
Almonds: are full of healthy monounsaturated fatty acids. Studies "prove" that after six months, dieters who eat almonds lost 63% more weight, 50% more body fat, and shrunk waistlines 55% more than those on high carb diets (though careful--they're high calorie).
Avocados: loaded with healthy monounsaturated fats, vitamins and minerals, and satisfying.
Apples: people who eat apples with every meal lose 40% more than those who do not (I guess it doesn't matter what you do or do not eat in addition to apples).
Oatmeal: slows digestion, keeps you full for hours,and people who eat oatmeal for every breakfast and walk 15 to 20 minutes a day lose 10 pounds in 12 weeks.
Peanut butter: research proves dieters who eat it lose more weight than those who don't (but didn't say how much weight, or how much peanut butter to eat).
Do the math! Just eat eggs, almonds, avocados, apples, oatmeal and peanut butter, and in six months you'll weigh less than when you were born and you can be a fashion model in Shanghai, Paris, or Los Angeles' Hill Street.
www.amoymagic.com
According to recent research, six foods will keep you so full and satisfied that, in theory, you would have negative weight in weeks.
No less an authority than Liz Vaccariello, Editor-in-Chief, PREVENTION, wrote on Sat Jun 27, 2009: (I edit it down considerably):
Eggs quell hunger. Women on low-fat diets who ate 2 eggs for breakfast at least 5 days a week lost 65% more weight and averaged 83% greater reduction in waist size (substitute low-fat yogurt for eggs if you're vegan).
Almonds: are full of healthy monounsaturated fatty acids. Studies "prove" that after six months, dieters who eat almonds lost 63% more weight, 50% more body fat, and shrunk waistlines 55% more than those on high carb diets (though careful--they're high calorie).
Avocados: loaded with healthy monounsaturated fats, vitamins and minerals, and satisfying.
Apples: people who eat apples with every meal lose 40% more than those who do not (I guess it doesn't matter what you do or do not eat in addition to apples).
Oatmeal: slows digestion, keeps you full for hours,and people who eat oatmeal for every breakfast and walk 15 to 20 minutes a day lose 10 pounds in 12 weeks.
Peanut butter: research proves dieters who eat it lose more weight than those who don't (but didn't say how much weight, or how much peanut butter to eat).
Do the math! Just eat eggs, almonds, avocados, apples, oatmeal and peanut butter, and in six months you'll weigh less than when you were born and you can be a fashion model in Shanghai, Paris, or Los Angeles' Hill Street.
www.amoymagic.com
Sunday, July 5, 2009
4th of July in Xiamen --1921!
Bill Brown ... Xiamen University
Some folks from the U.S. Consulate in Guangzhou, and visitors from the U.S., had some sort of get together in Xiamen (former Amoy), a week before July 4th. That was the closest, perhaps, to having an "official" 4th
of July celebration in Xiamen for over 60 years. But I have accounts from journals and diaries of pretty big July 4th celebrations in Xiamen dating back to the mid 1850s, and below is a photo of Americans in Amoy celebrating the U.S.' birthday in 1921. (I'm certainly glad we don't have to brave Xiamen summers in those kinds of clothes today).
By the way, while we're celebrating the 4th, let's give thanks to Xiamen, because no Xiamen, no U.S.A.! After all, it was Anxi tea (from Quanzhou) shipped from Xiamen by a Xiamen ship that was dumped overboard during the Boston Tea Party of 1773. So were it not for Xiamen, there would be no 4th of July, our lawyers would still be wearing powdered white wigs (like the guys in HK still wear), and we'd be eating our french fries with malt vinegar instead of ketchup. So.... thank you Xiamen!
Happy 4th!
Bill
Click the image for a larger view:
www.amoymagic.com
Some folks from the U.S. Consulate in Guangzhou, and visitors from the U.S., had some sort of get together in Xiamen (former Amoy), a week before July 4th. That was the closest, perhaps, to having an "official" 4th
of July celebration in Xiamen for over 60 years. But I have accounts from journals and diaries of pretty big July 4th celebrations in Xiamen dating back to the mid 1850s, and below is a photo of Americans in Amoy celebrating the U.S.' birthday in 1921. (I'm certainly glad we don't have to brave Xiamen summers in those kinds of clothes today).By the way, while we're celebrating the 4th, let's give thanks to Xiamen, because no Xiamen, no U.S.A.! After all, it was Anxi tea (from Quanzhou) shipped from Xiamen by a Xiamen ship that was dumped overboard during the Boston Tea Party of 1773. So were it not for Xiamen, there would be no 4th of July, our lawyers would still be wearing powdered white wigs (like the guys in HK still wear), and we'd be eating our french fries with malt vinegar instead of ketchup. So.... thank you Xiamen!
Happy 4th!
Bill
Click the image for a larger view:
www.amoymagic.com
Wednesday, July 1, 2009
The Great Firewall
Bill Brown
Around April, 2009, the Great Firewall of China blocked many servers, including Blogger, which hosts my blogs--so I can no longer easily update them unless I use a Proxy, which is not secure. So...no more posts for awhile.
Oh well. Life is Off the Wall.... especially when it's behind the Great Firewall.
Xiamen University
www.amoymagic.com
Around April, 2009, the Great Firewall of China blocked many servers, including Blogger, which hosts my blogs--so I can no longer easily update them unless I use a Proxy, which is not secure. So...no more posts for awhile.
Oh well. Life is Off the Wall.... especially when it's behind the Great Firewall.
Xiamen University
www.amoymagic.com
Monday, May 11, 2009
How to Unanswer E-mails!
Bill Brown ... Xiamen University
Ever struggled about whether you should reply to that e-mail or letter, or wait a bit--or toss it? In "The Wisdom of America," Lin Yutang quoted a delightful essay On Unanswering Letters, published back in 1928, long before people were deluged with daily letters, e-mail, and SPAM.
Ironically, the fellow in the essay who wrote the unanswered letter was named "Bill." Do you think that was a hint for me. If so, jot me a line and I'll get back to you--about Thanksgiving or Christmas.
On Unanswering Letters,
by Christopher Morley, from Essays, 1928, J.B. Lippincott Company
(Quoted in The Wisdom of America, pp. 250-253)
Ever struggled about whether you should reply to that e-mail or letter, or wait a bit--or toss it? In "The Wisdom of America," Lin Yutang quoted a delightful essay On Unanswering Letters, published back in 1928, long before people were deluged with daily letters, e-mail, and SPAM.
Ironically, the fellow in the essay who wrote the unanswered letter was named "Bill." Do you think that was a hint for me. If so, jot me a line and I'll get back to you--about Thanksgiving or Christmas.
On Unanswering Letters,
by Christopher Morley, from Essays, 1928, J.B. Lippincott Company
(Quoted in The Wisdom of America, pp. 250-253)
There are a great many people who really believe in answering letters the day they are received, just as there are people who go to the movies at nine o clock in the morning; but these people are stunted and queer.
It is a great mistake. Such crass and breathless promptness takes away a great deal of the pleasure of correspondence.
The psychological didoes involved in receiving letters and making up one s mind to answer them are very complex. If the tangled process could be clearly analyzed and its component involutions isolated for inspection we might reach a clearer comprehension of that curious bag of tricks, the efficient Masculine Mind.
Take Bill F., for instance, a man so delightful that even to contem plate his existence puts us in good humor and makes us think well of a world that can exhibit an individual equally comely in mind, body and estate. Every now and then we get a letter from Bill, and immediately we pass into a kind of trance, in which our mind rapidly enunciates the ideas, thoughts, surmises and contradictions that we would like to write to him in reply. We think what fun it would be to sit right down and churn the ink-well, spreading speculation and cynicism over a number of sheets of foolscap to be wafted Billward.
Sternly we repress the impulse for we know that the shock to Bill of getting so immediate a retort would surely unhinge the well-fitted panels of his intellect.
We add his letter to the large delta of unanswered mail on our desk, taking occasion to turn the mass over once or twice and run through it in a brisk, smiling mood, thinking of all the jolly letters we shall write some day.
After Bill's letter has lain on the pile for a fortnight or so it has been gently silted over by about twenty other pleasantly postponed manuscripts. Coming upon it by chance, we reflect that any specific problems raised by Bill in that manifesto will by. this time have settled themselves. And his random speculations upon household management and human destiny will probably have taken a new slant by now, so that to answer his letter in its own tune will not be congruent with his present fevers. We had better bide a wee until we really have some thing o circumstance to impart.
We wait a week.
By this time a certain sense of shame has begun to invade the privacy of our brain. We feel that to answer that letter now would be an indelicacy. Better to pretend that we never got it. By and bye Bill will write again and then we will answer promptly. We put the letter back in the middle of the heap and think what a fine chap Bill is. But he knows we love him, so it doesn t really matter whether we write or not.
Another week passes by, and no further communication from Bill. We wonder whether he does love us as much as we thought. Still we are too proud to write and ask.
A few days later a new thought strikes us. Perhaps Bill thinks we have died and he is annoyed because he wasn*t invited to the funeral, Ought we to wire him? No, because after all we are not dead, and even if he thinks we are, his subsequent relief at hearing the good news of our survival will outweigh his bitterness during the interval. One of these days we will write him a letter that will really express our heart, filled with all the grindings and gear-work of our mind, rich in affection and fallacy. But we had better let it ripen and mellow for a while. Letters, like wines, accumulate bright fumes and bubblings if kept under cork.
Presently we turn over that pile of letters again. We find in the lees of the heap two or three that have gone for six months and can safely be destroyed. Bill is still on our mind, but in a pleasant, dreamy kind of way* He does not ache or twinge us as he did a month ago. It is fine to have old friends like that and keep in touch with them. We wonder how he is and whether he has two children or three. Splendid old Bill!
By this time we have written Bill several letters in imagination and enjoyed doing so, but the matter of sending him an actual letter has begun to pall. The thought no longer has the savour and vivid sparkle it had once. When one feels like that it is unwise to write. Letters should be spontaneous outpourings: they should never be undertaken merely from a sense of duty. We know that Bill wouldn t want to get a letter that was dictated by a feeling of obligation.
Another fortnight or so elapsing, it occurs to us that we have entirely forgotten what Bill said to us in that letter. We take it out and con it over. Delightful fellow! It is full of his own felicitous kinks of whim, though some of it sounds a little old-fashioned by now- It seems a bit stale, has lost some of its freshness and surprise. Better not answer it just yet, for Christmas will soon be here and we shall have to write then anyway. We wonder, can Bill hold out until Christmas without a letter?
We have been rereading some of those imaginary letters to Bill that have been dancing in our head. They are full of all sorts of fine stuff. If Bill ever gets them he will know how we love him. To use O. Henry s immortal joke, we have days of Damon and Knights of Pythias writing those uninked letters to Bill A curious thought has come to us. Perhaps it would be better if we never saw Bill again. It is very difficult to talk to a man when you Eke him so much. It is much easier to write in the sweet fantastic strain. We are so inarticulate when face to face. If Bill comes to town, we will leave word that we have gone away. Good old Bill! He will always be a precious memory.
A few days later a sudden frenzy sweeps over us, and though we have many pressing matters on hand, we mobilize pen and paper and literary shock troops and prepare to hurl several battalions at BilL But, strangely enough, our utterance seems stilted and stiff. We have nothing to say. My dear Bill, we begin, it seems a long time since we heard from you. Why don t you write? We still love you, in spite of all your shortcomings.
That doesn t seem very cordial. We muse over the pen and nothing comes. Bursting with affection, we are unable to say a word.
Just then the phone rings. "Hello?"we say.
It is Bill, come to town unexpectedly.
"Good old fish!" we cry, ecstatic. "Meet you at the corner of Tenth and Chestnut in five minutes."
We tear up the unfinished letter. Bill will never know how much we love him. Perhaps it is just as well. It is very embarrassing to have your friends know how you feel about them. When we meet him we will be a little bit on our guard. It would not be well to be betrayed into any extravagance of cordiality.
And perhaps a not altogether false little story could be written about a man who never visited those most dear to him, because it hurt him so to say good-bye when he had to leave.
It is a great mistake. Such crass and breathless promptness takes away a great deal of the pleasure of correspondence.
The psychological didoes involved in receiving letters and making up one s mind to answer them are very complex. If the tangled process could be clearly analyzed and its component involutions isolated for inspection we might reach a clearer comprehension of that curious bag of tricks, the efficient Masculine Mind.
Take Bill F., for instance, a man so delightful that even to contem plate his existence puts us in good humor and makes us think well of a world that can exhibit an individual equally comely in mind, body and estate. Every now and then we get a letter from Bill, and immediately we pass into a kind of trance, in which our mind rapidly enunciates the ideas, thoughts, surmises and contradictions that we would like to write to him in reply. We think what fun it would be to sit right down and churn the ink-well, spreading speculation and cynicism over a number of sheets of foolscap to be wafted Billward.
Sternly we repress the impulse for we know that the shock to Bill of getting so immediate a retort would surely unhinge the well-fitted panels of his intellect.
We add his letter to the large delta of unanswered mail on our desk, taking occasion to turn the mass over once or twice and run through it in a brisk, smiling mood, thinking of all the jolly letters we shall write some day.
After Bill's letter has lain on the pile for a fortnight or so it has been gently silted over by about twenty other pleasantly postponed manuscripts. Coming upon it by chance, we reflect that any specific problems raised by Bill in that manifesto will by. this time have settled themselves. And his random speculations upon household management and human destiny will probably have taken a new slant by now, so that to answer his letter in its own tune will not be congruent with his present fevers. We had better bide a wee until we really have some thing o circumstance to impart.
We wait a week.
By this time a certain sense of shame has begun to invade the privacy of our brain. We feel that to answer that letter now would be an indelicacy. Better to pretend that we never got it. By and bye Bill will write again and then we will answer promptly. We put the letter back in the middle of the heap and think what a fine chap Bill is. But he knows we love him, so it doesn t really matter whether we write or not.
Another week passes by, and no further communication from Bill. We wonder whether he does love us as much as we thought. Still we are too proud to write and ask.
A few days later a new thought strikes us. Perhaps Bill thinks we have died and he is annoyed because he wasn*t invited to the funeral, Ought we to wire him? No, because after all we are not dead, and even if he thinks we are, his subsequent relief at hearing the good news of our survival will outweigh his bitterness during the interval. One of these days we will write him a letter that will really express our heart, filled with all the grindings and gear-work of our mind, rich in affection and fallacy. But we had better let it ripen and mellow for a while. Letters, like wines, accumulate bright fumes and bubblings if kept under cork.
Presently we turn over that pile of letters again. We find in the lees of the heap two or three that have gone for six months and can safely be destroyed. Bill is still on our mind, but in a pleasant, dreamy kind of way* He does not ache or twinge us as he did a month ago. It is fine to have old friends like that and keep in touch with them. We wonder how he is and whether he has two children or three. Splendid old Bill!
By this time we have written Bill several letters in imagination and enjoyed doing so, but the matter of sending him an actual letter has begun to pall. The thought no longer has the savour and vivid sparkle it had once. When one feels like that it is unwise to write. Letters should be spontaneous outpourings: they should never be undertaken merely from a sense of duty. We know that Bill wouldn t want to get a letter that was dictated by a feeling of obligation.
Another fortnight or so elapsing, it occurs to us that we have entirely forgotten what Bill said to us in that letter. We take it out and con it over. Delightful fellow! It is full of his own felicitous kinks of whim, though some of it sounds a little old-fashioned by now- It seems a bit stale, has lost some of its freshness and surprise. Better not answer it just yet, for Christmas will soon be here and we shall have to write then anyway. We wonder, can Bill hold out until Christmas without a letter?
We have been rereading some of those imaginary letters to Bill that have been dancing in our head. They are full of all sorts of fine stuff. If Bill ever gets them he will know how we love him. To use O. Henry s immortal joke, we have days of Damon and Knights of Pythias writing those uninked letters to Bill A curious thought has come to us. Perhaps it would be better if we never saw Bill again. It is very difficult to talk to a man when you Eke him so much. It is much easier to write in the sweet fantastic strain. We are so inarticulate when face to face. If Bill comes to town, we will leave word that we have gone away. Good old Bill! He will always be a precious memory.
A few days later a sudden frenzy sweeps over us, and though we have many pressing matters on hand, we mobilize pen and paper and literary shock troops and prepare to hurl several battalions at BilL But, strangely enough, our utterance seems stilted and stiff. We have nothing to say. My dear Bill, we begin, it seems a long time since we heard from you. Why don t you write? We still love you, in spite of all your shortcomings.
That doesn t seem very cordial. We muse over the pen and nothing comes. Bursting with affection, we are unable to say a word.
Just then the phone rings. "Hello?"we say.
It is Bill, come to town unexpectedly.
"Good old fish!" we cry, ecstatic. "Meet you at the corner of Tenth and Chestnut in five minutes."
We tear up the unfinished letter. Bill will never know how much we love him. Perhaps it is just as well. It is very embarrassing to have your friends know how you feel about them. When we meet him we will be a little bit on our guard. It would not be well to be betrayed into any extravagance of cordiality.
And perhaps a not altogether false little story could be written about a man who never visited those most dear to him, because it hurt him so to say good-bye when he had to leave.
Sunday, May 10, 2009
The Mother of Mother's Day
Bill Brown ... Xiamen University
Happy Mother's Day from Amoy!
I wrote this article for Common Talk in 2006.
When Anna May Jarvis's mother died on the second Sunday of May 1906, Anna May wished she had heeded the warning to, “Lavish your flowers on the living, not the dead.” Driven by remorse, the gentle, easy going Anna May became obsessed with the desire to see her mother and motherhood honored throughout the world.
After a year’s planning, the first Mother's Day was celebrated on the second anniversary of her mother’s death, May 10, 1908, at St. Andrew’s Methodist Church in Grafton, West Virginia, where Anna’s mother had taught Sunday School. A year later, Philadelphia became the first city to proclaim an official Mother’s Day. Three years later, in 1914, President Woodrow Wilson signed Public Resolution 25, establishing the second Sunday of each May as Mother's Day. And then, to everyone’s surprise, Anna May retired and spent the remaining 34 years of her life, and her fortune of over 100,000 dollars, fighting against Mother’s Day!
The problem was that from day one, Mother’s Day had become a great commercial extravaganza to boost the incomes of card and candy makers, and a salve to soothe the consciences of those who each May made mother a “queen for the day” but neglected her the other 364 days.
Anna May complained, “Mother’s Day has nothing to do with candy. Candy is junk. A maudlin, insincere printed card or a ready-made telegram means nothing except that you’re too lazy to write to the woman who has done more for you than anyone else in the world. You ought to go home and see your mother on Mother’s Day. You ought to take her out and paint the town red...You ought to give her something useful, something permanent...Is she sleeping warm at night? Could she use an eiderdown? Maybe the stairs in her home need fixing...”
For 30 years, Anna May fought for the integrity of Mother’s Day. She finally died in a sanitarium — old, tired, deaf, blind, penniless, and having never married nor been a mother herself!
Sixty years later, mothers may be more neglected than ever. Statistics show one half of Americans, which of course includes one half of our mothers, live in poverty. Where are the children? More than ever, mothers deserve more than cards and candy one day a year and anonymity the other 364.
My appreciation of motherhood only began as I watched my wife, Susan Marie, in both sickness and health, unselfishly spend herself on her two sons (and her husband as well!). I also slowly came to better appreciate my own mother, and though she’s 12,000 miles away, I am now careful to not only send her the obligatory Mother’s Day card and flowers but also to regularly write and phone her.
Fortunately, most Common Talk readers are not 12,000 miles away from home! So as Mother's Day catches on in China, let us seek to make Mother’s Day not a card-and-candy substitute for well-deserved love but the crown and pinnacle of a full year’s expression of love and appreciation for the one who gave us life: our mother.
www.amoymagic.com
Happy Mother's Day from Amoy!
I wrote this article for Common Talk in 2006.
When Anna May Jarvis's mother died on the second Sunday of May 1906, Anna May wished she had heeded the warning to, “Lavish your flowers on the living, not the dead.” Driven by remorse, the gentle, easy going Anna May became obsessed with the desire to see her mother and motherhood honored throughout the world.
After a year’s planning, the first Mother's Day was celebrated on the second anniversary of her mother’s death, May 10, 1908, at St. Andrew’s Methodist Church in Grafton, West Virginia, where Anna’s mother had taught Sunday School. A year later, Philadelphia became the first city to proclaim an official Mother’s Day. Three years later, in 1914, President Woodrow Wilson signed Public Resolution 25, establishing the second Sunday of each May as Mother's Day. And then, to everyone’s surprise, Anna May retired and spent the remaining 34 years of her life, and her fortune of over 100,000 dollars, fighting against Mother’s Day!
The problem was that from day one, Mother’s Day had become a great commercial extravaganza to boost the incomes of card and candy makers, and a salve to soothe the consciences of those who each May made mother a “queen for the day” but neglected her the other 364 days.
Anna May complained, “Mother’s Day has nothing to do with candy. Candy is junk. A maudlin, insincere printed card or a ready-made telegram means nothing except that you’re too lazy to write to the woman who has done more for you than anyone else in the world. You ought to go home and see your mother on Mother’s Day. You ought to take her out and paint the town red...You ought to give her something useful, something permanent...Is she sleeping warm at night? Could she use an eiderdown? Maybe the stairs in her home need fixing...”
For 30 years, Anna May fought for the integrity of Mother’s Day. She finally died in a sanitarium — old, tired, deaf, blind, penniless, and having never married nor been a mother herself!
Sixty years later, mothers may be more neglected than ever. Statistics show one half of Americans, which of course includes one half of our mothers, live in poverty. Where are the children? More than ever, mothers deserve more than cards and candy one day a year and anonymity the other 364.
My appreciation of motherhood only began as I watched my wife, Susan Marie, in both sickness and health, unselfishly spend herself on her two sons (and her husband as well!). I also slowly came to better appreciate my own mother, and though she’s 12,000 miles away, I am now careful to not only send her the obligatory Mother’s Day card and flowers but also to regularly write and phone her.
Fortunately, most Common Talk readers are not 12,000 miles away from home! So as Mother's Day catches on in China, let us seek to make Mother’s Day not a card-and-candy substitute for well-deserved love but the crown and pinnacle of a full year’s expression of love and appreciation for the one who gave us life: our mother.
www.amoymagic.com
Thursday, May 7, 2009
Princeton Premier Business Leaders and Professionals Honors Edition
Bill Brown ... Xiamen University
For years I've been getting invitations for "Who's Who in -- Fill in the Blanks," and countless Chinese versions of such "honors," but today I received this one from "Princeton." Pretty impressive--except as far as I can tell it really has nothing to do with Princeton. It is just a scam to get you to spend $100 nonrefundable to be included. But some Chinese colleagues are so excited about these frauds and think they're the ticket to fame and fortune abroad.
As Groucho Marx said in his oft-repeated quip, "I would not join any organization that would take me as a member."
Below is the entire letter, but for the record--I think none of these are worth the money they charge you, even if they're legitimate. In High School I paid for the "Who's Who" volume with me in it, and the "Outstanding American High School Students", and a couple others. My parents were very excited about them and did not want to miss the chance to get them. But what prospective employer or school really cares? These "directories" go by information you send them, and as far as I know do not verify anything. If I were a university or a prospective employer, I'd go by a resume that I could verify rather than a commercial "honors" directory.
Don't waste your money!
Dear Bill,
It is my pleasure to inform you that you are being considered for inclusion into the 2009-2010 Princeton Premier Business Leaders and Professionals Honors Edition section of the registry.
The 2009-2010 edition of the registry will include biographies of the world's most accomplished individuals. Recognition of this kind is an honor shared by thousands of executives and professionals throughout the world each year. Inclusion is considered by many as the single highest mark of achievement.
You may access our application form using the following link:
http://www.formdesk.com/pgn6/
Upon final confirmation, you will be listed among other accomplished individuals in the Princeton Premier Registry.
For accuracy and publication deadlines, please complete your application form and return it to us within five business days.
There is no cost to be included in the registry.
If you've already received this email from us, there is no need to respond again.
This email serves as our final invitation to potential members who have not yet responded.
On behalf of the Executive Publisher, we wish you continued success.
Sincerely,
Jason Harris
Managing Director
Princeton Premier
Princeton Premier
23-35A Steinway St - Astoria, NY 11105 - USA
www.amoymagic.com
For years I've been getting invitations for "Who's Who in -- Fill in the Blanks," and countless Chinese versions of such "honors," but today I received this one from "Princeton." Pretty impressive--except as far as I can tell it really has nothing to do with Princeton. It is just a scam to get you to spend $100 nonrefundable to be included. But some Chinese colleagues are so excited about these frauds and think they're the ticket to fame and fortune abroad.
As Groucho Marx said in his oft-repeated quip, "I would not join any organization that would take me as a member."
Below is the entire letter, but for the record--I think none of these are worth the money they charge you, even if they're legitimate. In High School I paid for the "Who's Who" volume with me in it, and the "Outstanding American High School Students", and a couple others. My parents were very excited about them and did not want to miss the chance to get them. But what prospective employer or school really cares? These "directories" go by information you send them, and as far as I know do not verify anything. If I were a university or a prospective employer, I'd go by a resume that I could verify rather than a commercial "honors" directory.
Don't waste your money!
Dear Bill,
It is my pleasure to inform you that you are being considered for inclusion into the 2009-2010 Princeton Premier Business Leaders and Professionals Honors Edition section of the registry.
The 2009-2010 edition of the registry will include biographies of the world's most accomplished individuals. Recognition of this kind is an honor shared by thousands of executives and professionals throughout the world each year. Inclusion is considered by many as the single highest mark of achievement.
You may access our application form using the following link:
http://www.formdesk.com/pgn6/
Upon final confirmation, you will be listed among other accomplished individuals in the Princeton Premier Registry.
For accuracy and publication deadlines, please complete your application form and return it to us within five business days.
There is no cost to be included in the registry.
If you've already received this email from us, there is no need to respond again.
This email serves as our final invitation to potential members who have not yet responded.
On behalf of the Executive Publisher, we wish you continued success.
Sincerely,
Jason Harris
Managing Director
Princeton Premier
Princeton Premier
23-35A Steinway St - Astoria, NY 11105 - USA
| We only support ethical email marketing. To remove yourself from future mailings, please visit here to use our automated removal system. You will be removed from our mailing database within seven (7) days. 7505 | |
www.amoymagic.com
Saturday, May 2, 2009
Chinese vs. American Culture
Bill Brown ... Xiamen University
I've been asked to lecture at a Chinese high school in Xiamen about the differences between Chinese and American culture, so below, and in a few following blogs, will be some rough drafts of my thoughts so far.
Any suggestions or additions? Please add them in the comments! I have a week to pull this together...
Differences between Chinese & American Culture
The longer I live in China, the more I realize that the difference between Chinese culture and American culture is—everything! From use of color to how we cook, from body language to body space, we are not just separate cultures but different planets. But fortunately, most of this is on the social level. Individually, we are very similar indeed, with the same needs, hopes, and fears as any other peoples on the planet. So I believe that the day will come when East does meet West—though it may not be in my lifetime.
There are so many issues in which we differ, so for this talk I will focus on just a few that many of us would assume are universal, such as views on body space and privacy, importance of family and patriotism, value of education and view of teachers, use of time and history, use of color, cooking and dining, and a little about Chinese and American humor. Of course, I may not be the right one to write this. My wife Susan Marie says I have no culture whatsoever. She’s probably right—but at least I have class. In fact, I have 12 hours of class a week in the MBA Program. Personally, I never expected to have so many classes in a classless society.
Part 1. Chinese & American Cooking & Dining
“With English cooking you boil the chicken, throw away the water and eat the chicken. With Chinese cooking you boil the chicken, throw away the carcass and drink the soup.” Anonymous
“One should eat to live, not live to eat.” Moliere
“Moliere never ate Chinese food.”
Bill Brown
I once joked that Adam and Eve could not have been Chinese because if they’d been Chinese, Eve would have tossed the apple and eaten the snake. But an Overseas Chinese friend said, “Not true! If she’d been Chinese, she’d have sold the apple, and then eaten the snake.”
Chinese seem to live for food, and spend much of their day preparing or eating dishes that are a feast for both palate and eyes—and things I never could have imagined people would eat. I eventually learned that Chinese eat anything edible, and if it isn’t edible, they call it medicine and ingest it anyway.
In N.W. Fujian they boast about noodles made from the flour of a very poisonous tuber. “Takes 18 steps to make it safe,” my host told me. I asked him how many people died on steps 1 to 17.
And birds nests! Just who thought of crawling up the side of a cliff into a cave to steal bird’s nest made of solidified swallow spit—and then cooking it? And in China I think I’ve eaten every part of a chicken, cow or pig except the meat itself. Chinese will fuss over a tiny morsel of meat that’s smaller than some of the bits I fish out of my mouth with a toothpick after the meal. If they do give you meat, it’s chopped up small—and chock full of sharp little bones. Personally, I think it’s all a front, carried out on a national level, and after foreign guests leave the room, the Chinese bring out the steaks and chops (and probably knives and forks as well).
The hardest thing to get used to is how long Chinese take to eat. At one of our first three-hour 20-course meals in China, my oldest son, who was only five, said, “This is certainly not fast food—it’s slow food.” For Chinese, meals are a social event. For Americans, meals are a pitstop for refueling. Quite often, we just swallow our meal whole and then chew it later.
www.amoymagic.com
I've been asked to lecture at a Chinese high school in Xiamen about the differences between Chinese and American culture, so below, and in a few following blogs, will be some rough drafts of my thoughts so far.
Any suggestions or additions? Please add them in the comments! I have a week to pull this together...
Differences between Chinese & American Culture
The longer I live in China, the more I realize that the difference between Chinese culture and American culture is—everything! From use of color to how we cook, from body language to body space, we are not just separate cultures but different planets. But fortunately, most of this is on the social level. Individually, we are very similar indeed, with the same needs, hopes, and fears as any other peoples on the planet. So I believe that the day will come when East does meet West—though it may not be in my lifetime.
There are so many issues in which we differ, so for this talk I will focus on just a few that many of us would assume are universal, such as views on body space and privacy, importance of family and patriotism, value of education and view of teachers, use of time and history, use of color, cooking and dining, and a little about Chinese and American humor. Of course, I may not be the right one to write this. My wife Susan Marie says I have no culture whatsoever. She’s probably right—but at least I have class. In fact, I have 12 hours of class a week in the MBA Program. Personally, I never expected to have so many classes in a classless society.Part 1. Chinese & American Cooking & Dining
“With English cooking you boil the chicken, throw away the water and eat the chicken. With Chinese cooking you boil the chicken, throw away the carcass and drink the soup.” Anonymous
“One should eat to live, not live to eat.” Moliere
“Moliere never ate Chinese food.”
Bill Brown
I once joked that Adam and Eve could not have been Chinese because if they’d been Chinese, Eve would have tossed the apple and eaten the snake. But an Overseas Chinese friend said, “Not true! If she’d been Chinese, she’d have sold the apple, and then eaten the snake.”
Chinese seem to live for food, and spend much of their day preparing or eating dishes that are a feast for both palate and eyes—and things I never could have imagined people would eat. I eventually learned that Chinese eat anything edible, and if it isn’t edible, they call it medicine and ingest it anyway.
In N.W. Fujian they boast about noodles made from the flour of a very poisonous tuber. “Takes 18 steps to make it safe,” my host told me. I asked him how many people died on steps 1 to 17.
And birds nests! Just who thought of crawling up the side of a cliff into a cave to steal bird’s nest made of solidified swallow spit—and then cooking it? And in China I think I’ve eaten every part of a chicken, cow or pig except the meat itself. Chinese will fuss over a tiny morsel of meat that’s smaller than some of the bits I fish out of my mouth with a toothpick after the meal. If they do give you meat, it’s chopped up small—and chock full of sharp little bones. Personally, I think it’s all a front, carried out on a national level, and after foreign guests leave the room, the Chinese bring out the steaks and chops (and probably knives and forks as well).
The hardest thing to get used to is how long Chinese take to eat. At one of our first three-hour 20-course meals in China, my oldest son, who was only five, said, “This is certainly not fast food—it’s slow food.” For Chinese, meals are a social event. For Americans, meals are a pitstop for refueling. Quite often, we just swallow our meal whole and then chew it later.
www.amoymagic.com
Lin Yutang on the Futility of Force
Bill Brown ... Xiamen University
In 1943, in his book "Between Tears and Laughter," Lin Yutang angered friends and foes alike by candidly laying bare the true motives behind the wars and the political machinations going on around the planet. And by the simple expediency of analyzing what the "Powers" had been doing, Lin was able to predict exactly what those same Powers would be doing half a century later.
Though Christ said, "Blessed are the peacemakers," I am skeptical of the motives of some who cry peace, peace (Herr Hitler cried peace even as he sharpened his swords]. But like Lin Yutang, I also do not feel it is unpatriotic or unChristian to question the motives of those resorting to war for the cause of peace.
The following excerpt from Lin Yutang's Between Tears and Laughter is, I think, even more poignant today, over 60 years after it was written. Download the entire book at Internet Archives, and as you read it, note the parallels with much of what we see today. In particular--note how Lin predicted we would rebuild Japan, and why.
Lin Yutang on the Futility of Force
Note: Lin did note, interestingly, that there were occasions where war was unavoidable:
"Civil wars are necessary in a nation until an equilibrium is restored. Revolts against empires are necessary until the invader is driven out. The only stable equilibrium in the world is the equilibrium of equality. Only when such equilibrium is reached can we have peace. Small countries have the right to fight, perhaps to settle an old boundary dispute. Big countries have no right to fight, ever, because when they fight they involve the whole world.
Lin Yutang on "Big Neighbors":
...Of all the fifty or sixty nations in the world, only three or four big powers are upsetting the peace of the world. These powers have run over this earth, kicking down people's fences in bad temper and worse manners, robbing them of their liberty and independence, and taking possession of their goods and have then
fought wars among themselves for these goods. First they fought among themselves, and then they called upon the entire world to fight for them to keep what they have. This makes little sense, and it makes still less sense to say that we can have peace only by giving greater power to the big powers and disarming the small powers, on the plea that the small powers may combine to attack them!
Big Powers, at least behave as if you were not scared! But now we suddenly hear about policing the world, as if the Greenlanders and Samoans and Formosans and Burmese were threatening the world peace, while the big powers don their uniforms, strutting about to club the small powers on their heads with a baton if they do not behave. It would seem that we could well police the big powers for a while and leave the poor Samoans and Balinese and Eskimos alone. But, no, we cannot disarm the big powers, because the big powers will not be disarmed, after having so heroically fought and triumphed in this war. Very well, then, let's have wars eternally. The first thing we know the police will start shooting among themselves and scare us poor humble neighbors out of our wits.www.amoymagic.com
In 1943, in his book "Between Tears and Laughter," Lin Yutang angered friends and foes alike by candidly laying bare the true motives behind the wars and the political machinations going on around the planet. And by the simple expediency of analyzing what the "Powers" had been doing, Lin was able to predict exactly what those same Powers would be doing half a century later.
Though Christ said, "Blessed are the peacemakers," I am skeptical of the motives of some who cry peace, peace (Herr Hitler cried peace even as he sharpened his swords]. But like Lin Yutang, I also do not feel it is unpatriotic or unChristian to question the motives of those resorting to war for the cause of peace.
The following excerpt from Lin Yutang's Between Tears and Laughter is, I think, even more poignant today, over 60 years after it was written. Download the entire book at Internet Archives, and as you read it, note the parallels with much of what we see today. In particular--note how Lin predicted we would rebuild Japan, and why.
Lin Yutang on the Futility of Force
Who will make plain to the world the law of the spirit, and demonstrate that Force generates Coercion, Coercion generates Fear, and Fear generates Hatred, as definitely and as accurately as one billiard ball sends another rolling? Who will write a philosophy and psychology of Force and its reactions and determine their characteristics ? Who will be the consummate fatalist to tell the world in plain, convincing, forceful terms that actions generate emotions and emotions in turn generate actions, that the fruit of Force is Fear and Hatred, that thoroughgoing Force generates Fear and Hatred and unthoroughgoing Force generates Hatred without Fear? Who will say, even as in a classroom in physics, that the greater the Force, the greater the Hatred, and that the greatest Force is the most hated of all?
And who will say, as clearly as the prophets of the sky say that a thunderclap presages a storm, that Force is inevitably followed by Hatred, and Hatred is followed by Revenge? For Hatred divides, and the structure of power must sooner or later fall.
In ignorance of such simple and self-evident moral laws, Pericles alternately threatened by force and cajoled by oratory the other Greek states. And after his death, Cleon the leather merchant, Eucrates the rope-seller, and Hyperbolus the lampmaker babbled. They were all good democrats and Cleon was a good general It was left only for the insolent public idol, Alcibiades, to complete the suicide of Greece.
But such laws, being the laws of God, are manifest to the mind of the simple man, requiring no proof. Therefore, he who would be strong within must guard against the use of power, for only then is he safe from corruption within and hatred without. And only he who is free from corruption within and hatred without can be strong eternally. Laotse says, "For love is victorious in attack and invulnerable in defense. Heaven arms with love those it would not see destroyed." Therefore he says:
Of all things, soldiers are instruments of evil, Hated by men. Therefore the religious man avoids them. Soldiers are weapons of evil; They are not the weapons of the gentleman. When the use of soldiers cannot be helped, The best policy is calm restraint. Even in victory, there is no beauty, And who calls it beautiful Is one who delights in slaughter. He who delights in slaughter Will not succeed in his ambition to rule the world. The slaying of multitudes should be mourned with sorrow. A victory should be celebrated with the Funeral Rite. Those who love America and England and wish them to be strong forever must read Laotse again and again, for they will gain thereby the secret of immortal strength, exempt from corruption within and invulnerable from attack without. Let America be great, even as the great river of life: The Great Tao flows everywhere, (Like a flood) it may go left or right The myriad things derive their life from it, And it does not deny them. When its work is accomplished, It does not take possession. It clothes and feeds the myriad things, Yet does not claim them as its own... Because to the end it does not claim greatness, Its greatness is achieved. How did the great rivers and seas become the Lords of the Ravines ? By being good at keeping low. That was how they became the Lords of the Ravines. Therefore in order to be the chief among the people, One must speak like their inferiors. In order to be foremost among the people, One must walk behind them. Thus it is that the sage stays above, And the people do not feel his weight; Walks in front, And the people do not wish him harm. Then the people of the world are glad to uphold him forever. Because he does not contend, No one in the world can contend against him. I am not worried lest America may not be able to assert a leadership of force and power; I am worried lest she may. I am concerned to see America assume a moral leadership, a leadership of humility, so that the world may pay her glad homage and uphold her forever. Like the great river that nourishes life along its valley, she shall by the exuberance and richness of her life be a blessing upon the peoples of the earth. She shall stay above, and the world shall not feel her weight; she shall walk in front and no one will wish her harm. For she shall then lead in kindness and unselfishness and justice and by that secret of unused power bring a new era of brotherhood to mankind. No one can dethrone her because of her power for goodness, and no one can take away from her, because she does not take possession, She shall not contend, and no one in the world can contend against her, and because she takes no credit, the credit can never be taken away from her. This is my Dream America. Will it come true? Man has done it before. Abraham Lincoln did it. George Washington did it. In a world of evil chaos, great men have stood up and with the strength of their goodness and their simplicity and the innocence of youth proclaimed that the good in men can outweigh the evil, and they have acted upon that assumption.In ignorance of such simple and self-evident moral laws, Pericles alternately threatened by force and cajoled by oratory the other Greek states. And after his death, Cleon the leather merchant, Eucrates the rope-seller, and Hyperbolus the lampmaker babbled. They were all good democrats and Cleon was a good general It was left only for the insolent public idol, Alcibiades, to complete the suicide of Greece.
But such laws, being the laws of God, are manifest to the mind of the simple man, requiring no proof. Therefore, he who would be strong within must guard against the use of power, for only then is he safe from corruption within and hatred without. And only he who is free from corruption within and hatred without can be strong eternally. Laotse says, "For love is victorious in attack and invulnerable in defense. Heaven arms with love those it would not see destroyed." Therefore he says:
Note: Lin did note, interestingly, that there were occasions where war was unavoidable:
"Civil wars are necessary in a nation until an equilibrium is restored. Revolts against empires are necessary until the invader is driven out. The only stable equilibrium in the world is the equilibrium of equality. Only when such equilibrium is reached can we have peace. Small countries have the right to fight, perhaps to settle an old boundary dispute. Big countries have no right to fight, ever, because when they fight they involve the whole world.
Lin Yutang on "Big Neighbors":
...Of all the fifty or sixty nations in the world, only three or four big powers are upsetting the peace of the world. These powers have run over this earth, kicking down people's fences in bad temper and worse manners, robbing them of their liberty and independence, and taking possession of their goods and have then
fought wars among themselves for these goods. First they fought among themselves, and then they called upon the entire world to fight for them to keep what they have. This makes little sense, and it makes still less sense to say that we can have peace only by giving greater power to the big powers and disarming the small powers, on the plea that the small powers may combine to attack them!
Big Powers, at least behave as if you were not scared! But now we suddenly hear about policing the world, as if the Greenlanders and Samoans and Formosans and Burmese were threatening the world peace, while the big powers don their uniforms, strutting about to club the small powers on their heads with a baton if they do not behave. It would seem that we could well police the big powers for a while and leave the poor Samoans and Balinese and Eskimos alone. But, no, we cannot disarm the big powers, because the big powers will not be disarmed, after having so heroically fought and triumphed in this war. Very well, then, let's have wars eternally. The first thing we know the police will start shooting among themselves and scare us poor humble neighbors out of our wits.www.amoymagic.com
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
Proof: U.S. Government is Taoist!
Bill Brown ... Xiamen University
At long last I have discovered the secret behind how the U.S. government works: both Democrats and Republicans alike are Taoists. Need proof? Just consider the following passage from Lao Tse's "Tao Dejing" (Taoist Scripture). Though written five centuries before Christ, the following passage sounds just like a manual for modern government:
"The ancients who showed their skill in practicing the Tao did so, not to enlighten the people, but rather to make them simple and ignorant.
The difficulty in governing the people arises from their having much knowledge. He who (tries to) govern a state by his wisdom is a scourge to it; while he who does not (try to) do so is a blessing." 65 道德经:古之善为道者，非以明民，将以愚之。民之难治，以其智多。故以智治国，国之贼；不以智治国，国之福。
If people ruled by leaders without wisdom are blessed, we are very fortunate in this day and age! But seriously, Old Lao Tzu did have some shrewd insights on good government. Consider verse 57:
"In the kingdom the more prohibitions, the poorer the people become...the more laws, the more thieves and robbers there are." 57道德经:天下多忌讳，而民弥贫...法令滋彰，盗贼多有。
No wonder Mark Twain said we had so many cons in Congress.
Not that I'm complaining--at least much. For all America's faults, at least we are allowed to complain about them--a freedom that in itself covers a multitude of sins. If dissent is allowed, change is possible--at least in theory.
Lao Tse's Three Treasures Lao Tse, by the way, had some priorities that it might do for our modern rulers to adopt. He said his three treasures were gentleness, frugality, and not putting himself first. He explained, "Gentleness lets me be bold, frugality enables me to be liberal, not putting myself above others allows me to take the place of highest honor. " He then said, "Now-a-days [2500 years ago!], they give up gentleness for boldness, frugality for liberality, and the hindmost place to be foremost--all ending in death."
Maybe Lao Tse knew what he was talking about after all!
In closing, here is Lao Tse on Over-Government:
"The people starve because overtaxed by officials. This causes famine. The people are hard to govern because they are governed too much. This makes them ungovernable." 75 道德经:民之饥，以其上食税之多，是以饥。民之难治，以其上之有为，是以难治
Well, I hear the bells of nearby Nanputuo Temple ringing; Congress must be back in session. Ommmmmmm.
Reference: Lao Tse's 3 Treasures: 道德经: 我有三宝，持而保之。一曰慈，二曰俭，三曰不敢为天下先。慈故能勇；俭故能广；不敢为天下先，故能成器长。今舍慈且勇；舍俭且广；舍后且先；死矣！
www.amoymagic.com
At long last I have discovered the secret behind how the U.S. government works: both Democrats and Republicans alike are Taoists. Need proof? Just consider the following passage from Lao Tse's "Tao Dejing" (Taoist Scripture). Though written five centuries before Christ, the following passage sounds just like a manual for modern government:
"The ancients who showed their skill in practicing the Tao did so, not to enlighten the people, but rather to make them simple and ignorant.
The difficulty in governing the people arises from their having much knowledge. He who (tries to) govern a state by his wisdom is a scourge to it; while he who does not (try to) do so is a blessing." 65 道德经:古之善为道者，非以明民，将以愚之。民之难治，以其智多。故以智治国，国之贼；不以智治国，国之福。
If people ruled by leaders without wisdom are blessed, we are very fortunate in this day and age! But seriously, Old Lao Tzu did have some shrewd insights on good government. Consider verse 57:
"In the kingdom the more prohibitions, the poorer the people become...the more laws, the more thieves and robbers there are." 57道德经:天下多忌讳，而民弥贫...法令滋彰，盗贼多有。
No wonder Mark Twain said we had so many cons in Congress.
Not that I'm complaining--at least much. For all America's faults, at least we are allowed to complain about them--a freedom that in itself covers a multitude of sins. If dissent is allowed, change is possible--at least in theory.
Lao Tse's Three Treasures Lao Tse, by the way, had some priorities that it might do for our modern rulers to adopt. He said his three treasures were gentleness, frugality, and not putting himself first. He explained, "Gentleness lets me be bold, frugality enables me to be liberal, not putting myself above others allows me to take the place of highest honor. " He then said, "Now-a-days [2500 years ago!], they give up gentleness for boldness, frugality for liberality, and the hindmost place to be foremost--all ending in death."
Maybe Lao Tse knew what he was talking about after all!
In closing, here is Lao Tse on Over-Government:
"The people starve because overtaxed by officials. This causes famine. The people are hard to govern because they are governed too much. This makes them ungovernable." 75 道德经:民之饥，以其上食税之多，是以饥。民之难治，以其上之有为，是以难治
Well, I hear the bells of nearby Nanputuo Temple ringing; Congress must be back in session. Ommmmmmm.
Reference: Lao Tse's 3 Treasures: 道德经: 我有三宝，持而保之。一曰慈，二曰俭，三曰不敢为天下先。慈故能勇；俭故能广；不敢为天下先，故能成器长。今舍慈且勇；舍俭且广；舍后且先；死矣！
www.amoymagic.com
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
This Folder is Shared with Other People [ cannot move error]
Bill Brown .. Xiamen University
This blog entry is not related to Xiamen...but then it again, it is, since we all use computers, and someone out there may be able to help! (By the way, when I came to Xiamen University in 1988, we had no computers in the MBA Center's office, and the Foreign Affair's first computer was one that I put together with parts that I brought in from Hong Kong. How times have changed!).
Here's the problem. With Microsoft Vista, quite often it gives me an error message when I try to moved a folder. A box pops up with the warning "This folder is shared with other people. If you move this folder, it will no longer be shared." It then gives me the option to continue or cancel. If I cancel, it freezes, and if I try to then cancel, I cannot. But a few minutes later (sometime 15 minutes later), I get a message
"Buffer overrun detected! Program:...PowerCinema for TOSHIBA\KERNEL|CLML\CLMLSvc.exe A buffer overrun has been detected which has corrupted the program's internal state. The program cannot safely continue execution and must now be terminated."
One, my folders are NOT shared with anyone else, and I've even closed the Power Cinema Program, which appears to be a Power Problem. But nothing helps. I've even completely disabled the Cyberlink PowerCinema and rebooted; no use. Does anyone have any idea what to do--other than to chuck the computer and send a letter to Osama Bin Laden asking him to pay a visit to Microsoft? Thanks.
Enjoy Amoy-- anyway!
Dr. Bill
www.amoymagic.com
This blog entry is not related to Xiamen...but then it again, it is, since we all use computers, and someone out there may be able to help! (By the way, when I came to Xiamen University in 1988, we had no computers in the MBA Center's office, and the Foreign Affair's first computer was one that I put together with parts that I brought in from Hong Kong. How times have changed!).
Here's the problem. With Microsoft Vista, quite often it gives me an error message when I try to moved a folder. A box pops up with the warning "This folder is shared with other people. If you move this folder, it will no longer be shared." It then gives me the option to continue or cancel. If I cancel, it freezes, and if I try to then cancel, I cannot. But a few minutes later (sometime 15 minutes later), I get a message
"Buffer overrun detected! Program:...PowerCinema for TOSHIBA\KERNEL|CLML\CLMLSvc.exe A buffer overrun has been detected which has corrupted the program's internal state. The program cannot safely continue execution and must now be terminated."
One, my folders are NOT shared with anyone else, and I've even closed the Power Cinema Program, which appears to be a Power Problem. But nothing helps. I've even completely disabled the Cyberlink PowerCinema and rebooted; no use. Does anyone have any idea what to do--other than to chuck the computer and send a letter to Osama Bin Laden asking him to pay a visit to Microsoft? Thanks.
Enjoy Amoy-- anyway!
Dr. Bill
www.amoymagic.com
20 Ounces or 12?
Bill Brown ... Xiamen University
Dr. Tom sent this about stress. Of course, Dr. Tom is one of those folks who forwards several things a day--but this one has some very choice quotes, and deserves to be shared. I especially liked the very last quote--perhaps because I'm always getting sidetracked--but sidetrack or main track, I enjoy the ride! Enjoy.
A lecturer, when explaining stress management to an audience, raised a glass of water and asked, 'How heavy is this glass of water?' Answers called out ranged from 8oz. to 20oz.
The lecturer replied, 'The absolute weight doesn't matter. It depends on how long you try to hold it. If I hold it for a minute, that's not a problem. If I hold it for an hour, I'll have an ache in my right arm. If I hold it for a day, you'll have to call an ambulance.'
'In each case it's the same weight, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes.' He continued, 'And that's the way it is with stress management. If we carry our burdens all the time, sooner or later, as the burden becomes increasingly heavy, we won't be able to carry on.'
'As with the glass of water, you have to put it down for a while and rest before holding it again, when we're refreshed, we can carry on with the burden.'
'So, before you return home tonight, put the burden of work or life down. Don't carry it home. You can pick it up tomorrow. Whatever burdens you're carrying now, let them down for a moment if you can. Relax; pick them up later after you've rested.
‘Life is short. Enjoy!’ And then he shared some ways of dealing with the burden of life:
* Accept that some days you're the pigeon, and some days you're the statue
* Always keep your words soft and sweet, just in case you have to eat them.
* Always read stuff that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it.
* Drive carefully. It's not only cars that can be recalled by their Maker.
* If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.
* If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably worth it.
* It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.
* Never buy a car you can't push.
* Never put both feet in your mouth at the same time, because then you won't have a leg to stand on.
* Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance.
* Since it's the early worm that gets eaten by the bird, sleep late.
* The second mouse gets the cheese.
* When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
* Birthdays are good for you. The more you have, the longer you live.
* You may be only one person in the world, but you may also be the world to one person.
* Some mistakes are too much fun to only make once.
* We could learn a lot from crayons. Some are sharp, some are pretty and some are dull. Some have weird names and all are different colors, but they all have to live in the same box.
* A truly happy person is one who can enjoy the scenery on a detour.
www.amoymagic.com
Dr. Tom sent this about stress. Of course, Dr. Tom is one of those folks who forwards several things a day--but this one has some very choice quotes, and deserves to be shared. I especially liked the very last quote--perhaps because I'm always getting sidetracked--but sidetrack or main track, I enjoy the ride! Enjoy.
A lecturer, when explaining stress management to an audience, raised a glass of water and asked, 'How heavy is this glass of water?' Answers called out ranged from 8oz. to 20oz.
The lecturer replied, 'The absolute weight doesn't matter. It depends on how long you try to hold it. If I hold it for a minute, that's not a problem. If I hold it for an hour, I'll have an ache in my right arm. If I hold it for a day, you'll have to call an ambulance.'
'In each case it's the same weight, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes.' He continued, 'And that's the way it is with stress management. If we carry our burdens all the time, sooner or later, as the burden becomes increasingly heavy, we won't be able to carry on.'
'As with the glass of water, you have to put it down for a while and rest before holding it again, when we're refreshed, we can carry on with the burden.'
'So, before you return home tonight, put the burden of work or life down. Don't carry it home. You can pick it up tomorrow. Whatever burdens you're carrying now, let them down for a moment if you can. Relax; pick them up later after you've rested.
‘Life is short. Enjoy!’ And then he shared some ways of dealing with the burden of life:
* Accept that some days you're the pigeon, and some days you're the statue
* Always keep your words soft and sweet, just in case you have to eat them.
* Always read stuff that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it.
* Drive carefully. It's not only cars that can be recalled by their Maker.
* If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.
* If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably worth it.
* It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.
* Never buy a car you can't push.
* Never put both feet in your mouth at the same time, because then you won't have a leg to stand on.
* Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance.
* Since it's the early worm that gets eaten by the bird, sleep late.
* The second mouse gets the cheese.
* When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
* Birthdays are good for you. The more you have, the longer you live.
* You may be only one person in the world, but you may also be the world to one person.
* Some mistakes are too much fun to only make once.
* We could learn a lot from crayons. Some are sharp, some are pretty and some are dull. Some have weird names and all are different colors, but they all have to live in the same box.
* A truly happy person is one who can enjoy the scenery on a detour.
www.amoymagic.com
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